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How to restore the Jacobite heirs to their throne and why you should support it

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Jacob Harrison:
I talked about the Jacobite sucession before. So I came up with a step by step plan to restore the rightful heirs to the British throne to power. Since most of you don’t seem to give a damn about the Jacobite cause, I will first explain why it matters to you.

It matters because of the Muslim migrant  crisis. The UK and the majority of the Commonwealth realms support open borders, allowing Muslim migrants into the countries. If you read the news, you will easily find the concept that Islam is a religion of peace to be complete bullshit. The UK and other European countries have suffered from horrible terrorist attacks committed by Muslims. You may argue that not all Muslims are terrorists. That is true but your missing the point. There is a strong correlation between Muslim migration and terrorism because Muslims come from countries that have terrorists.

And Muslims that commit terrorist attacks are not the only threat. Most Muslims sympathize with the terrorists and want Sharia Law to become the law in European countries. They consider women to be lesser than men and believe in forcing women to cover their heads in hijabs. Muslim countries have the worst women rights records. They believe in wife beating. Some even practice female genital mutilation. They believe in marrying underage girls since their prophet Muhammad married a 9 year old. They kill women who have extramarital sex. They even punish women who were raped, blaming them for not covering up. They think that it is justified to rape women who don’t cover up their bodies. Germany and Sweden have the worst Muslim migrant rape epidemic. There are women’s marches in Germany against the bitch Angela Merkel for letting rapists into their country. This video explains the crisis. https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=D3ClAeKhazo

In order to save humanity from Islam, we need to get the Muslims deported from Europe and sent back to the Middle East and Africa. Queen Elizabeth II and the House of Windsor have betrayed their country by tolerating the massive influx of Muslim migrants to Britain. They do not deserve their throne. However the monarchs of Merry Old England never tolerated Islam. Good king Richard the Lionheart went on a crusade to stop the Muslim menace.

So Britain needs monarchs that will defend their own people such as the heirs of Saint Charles I. Britain needs monarchs that actually rule the country and lead armies into battle instead of being celebrities. Therefore Britain needs to be ruled by the descendants of Saint Charles I.

The problem in Europe is that the European countries banned guns so the people are unable to defend themselves from terrorists. You may argue that guns cause mass shootings in the US such as the horrible tragedy in Parkland Florida but that is not true. Of course psychopaths such as Nicholas Cruz should NOT have been allowed to get a gun but that is the fault of the FBI for ignoring the warning signs. Arming well trained teachers is what saves lives because they can immediately shoot psycho shooters. Guns save lives because it is used for self defense.

So step 1 of the plan is to smuggle guns into Britain so that the British can defend themselves. The British will learn that guns will save the lives of their children. So when the government tries to take away their guns, they will refuse to give them up which will lead to an armed rebellion. It should be led by a charismatic Neo Jacobite leader. Perhaps a Scot since the Scottish idolize their hero Bonnie Prince Charlie.

The Jacobite heir Prince Joseph Wenzel lives in Britain. The rebels can kidnap him, have him crowned King and a female rebel can force him into marriage so that a future son or daughter of his will be raised to become King or Queen.

Once the British rebels have won, they can invade France so that Joseph will be crowned King of France. Then the British can invade the Vatican. Pope Francis will be deposed, put on trial for covering up the pedophilia scandal, and executed. Then the Cardinals will be forced to elect Joseph as the new Pope.

Then the British and French can go on a new crusade against our Muslim enemies, Turkey, Saudi Arabia, Iran etc. The heir to the Palavi Dynazty will be made Shah of Iran. The Arab lands will be part of the Franco British Empire where the Muslims will be forced to submission. The Arab Christains will be in charge of the local governments. The women will be allowed to uncover themselves and wear bikinis.

So join this Neo Jacobite cause to stop the spread of the cancer of Islam!

 

dpareja:
Hi, I'm Jacob Harrison, and I think that democracy sucks balls.

Tolpuddle Martyr:
So, our Denim snowdropper has taken a break from the Gap catalogue to tell us how he opposed Oliver Cromwell because he was a sectarian and was mean to Catholics, which he's not anymore-whatever, but he was to restore a dead royal line because he thinks they'll be sectarian to Muslims, because reasons.

Also thinks that the present Royals could summon the PM and ask them to do their bidding or even more hilariously, that a bunch of randos no one's heard of could do it after turfing the incomprehensibly popular Windsors out of Buckingham Palace and pulling a Lannister on them.

niam2023:
Presumably he wants to recruit the Boltons and Freys to help.

Careful with that Ramsay - present your back once too many times and you're kibble.

Art Vandelay:
So basically, you want to induce a demand spike for guns in the UK, a demand spike which you and your newly set up arms smuggling operation will be in the perfect position to take advantage of, which will hopefully allow you to raise the money required for me to come over there and cut your balls off, no?

You know, I think you might be on to something. That said, if I may offer some advice. Don't sell exclusively to the neo-Jacobites. Also sell to the Muslim nutjobs, and perhaps the Welsh and Northern Irish separatists, and the existing government (it'll be a lot easier than you'd imagine), and anyone else who can pay. That way, you create a delicious positive feedback loop where each side is trying to arm themselves more heavily than the other, and ideally a stalemate where neither side can defeat the other. In the end, you'll be rolling in cash for the next decade. I might even be able to come over there in a private jet, stay in a five star all inclusive resort and cut your balls off using gold plated, diamond encrusted gardening shears and wearing only the finest custom made clown suit from Dolce and Gabana.

Ah, that'd be the dream.

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