Author Topic: What happens when a fundie writes fanfiction  (Read 12073 times)

0 Members and 1 Guest are viewing this topic.

Offline jumpingjackflash

  • Agent Swears-A-Lot Peashooter
  • Pope
  • ****
  • Posts: 469
  • Gender: Male
  • Burn, baby, burn!
What happens when a fundie writes fanfiction
« on: January 23, 2012, 03:06:39 am »
http://www.fanfiction.net/s/5102928/1/Harry_Potter_turns_to_the_Lord

It's so bad, it's mentioned in TVTropes' So Bad, It's Horrible/Fanfic page: http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Horrible/FanficE-H

Bonus points for the fact that the author himself actually reviewing the fic and calling it "A true masterpiece, worthy of Christ's blessing" even though Pride is considered the worst out of the 7 Deadly Sins.

Ok seriously, is nobody even going to try and avenge my man-burrito?

Offline Shane for Wax

  • Official Mosin Nagant Fanboy, Crazy, and Lord of Androgynes
  • Kakarot
  • ******
  • Posts: I am a geek!!
  • Gender: Male
  • Twin to shy, lover of weapons, pagan, wolf-brother
    • Game Podunk
Re: What happens when a fundie writes fanfiction
« Reply #1 on: January 23, 2012, 03:18:46 am »
Could be worse, could be this monstrosity. WARNING: highly NSFW and not really safe for anything. My sanity crumbled when I first read it.

&
"The human race. Greatest monsters of them all."
"Ke barjurir gar'ade, jagyc'ade kot'la a dalyc'ade kotla'shya."
Fucking Dalek twats I’m going to twat you over the head with my fucking TARDIS you fucking fucks!

Offline Captain Jack Harkness

  • Petter, Brony, and All-Around Cartoon Addict
  • The Beast
  • *****
  • Posts: 2868
  • Gender: Male
  • Or as a friend calls him, Captain Jack Hotness!
Re: What happens when a fundie writes fanfiction
« Reply #2 on: January 23, 2012, 03:19:02 am »
You didn't actually read the entire thing, did you?  I couldn't bring myself to.
My friend's blog.  Check it out!

I blame/credit The Doctor with inspiring my name change.

Offline Shane for Wax

  • Official Mosin Nagant Fanboy, Crazy, and Lord of Androgynes
  • Kakarot
  • ******
  • Posts: I am a geek!!
  • Gender: Male
  • Twin to shy, lover of weapons, pagan, wolf-brother
    • Game Podunk
Re: What happens when a fundie writes fanfiction
« Reply #3 on: January 23, 2012, 03:22:20 am »
Shy gave me his trainwreck syndrome at the time.

&
"The human race. Greatest monsters of them all."
"Ke barjurir gar'ade, jagyc'ade kot'la a dalyc'ade kotla'shya."
Fucking Dalek twats I’m going to twat you over the head with my fucking TARDIS you fucking fucks!

Offline Eniliad

  • Sword And Shield Of The Innocent
  • The Beast
  • *****
  • Posts: 1265
  • Gender: Male
  • Perpetually horny cock-slave
Re: What happens when a fundie writes fanfiction
« Reply #4 on: January 23, 2012, 03:32:42 am »
How joyless and paranoid is your life if you are so freaked out by some dumb fantasy book that you have to write an entire fucking fanfiction to make peace with it? That's some serious obsession right there, for someone who doesn't like it.
<Miles> "If dildoes are outlawed then only outlaws will have dildoes."
Quote from: Mlle Antéchrist
Yeah, gays cause hurricanes, tits cause earthquakes, and lack of prayer causes tornadoes. Learn to science, people.
Quote from: Mlle Antéchrist
Porn peddlers peddling pedal porn? My life is complete.

Offline jumpingjackflash

  • Agent Swears-A-Lot Peashooter
  • Pope
  • ****
  • Posts: 469
  • Gender: Male
  • Burn, baby, burn!
Re: What happens when a fundie writes fanfiction
« Reply #5 on: January 23, 2012, 03:56:01 am »
From Shane's link

Quote
Jesus Christ's incredible face rape

Ok seriously, is nobody even going to try and avenge my man-burrito?

Art Vandelay

  • Guest
Re: What happens when a fundie writes fanfiction
« Reply #6 on: January 23, 2012, 05:33:30 am »
Could be worse, could be this monstrosity. WARNING: highly NSFW and not really safe for anything. My sanity crumbled when I first read it.
My hat goes off to the author. That is truly hilarious.

Offline rosenewock21

  • The Snuffleupagus of the Satanic Sesame Street
  • God
  • *****
  • Posts: 585
  • Gender: Female
  • Holder of the sleepy time rag
Re: What happens when a fundie writes fanfiction
« Reply #7 on: January 23, 2012, 05:38:08 am »
Could be worse, could be this monstrosity. WARNING: highly NSFW and not really safe for anything. My sanity crumbled when I first read it.
My hat goes off to the author. That is truly hilarious.

I couldn't even make it past the A/N. Though now it makes me want to write one where the Devil really is God's ex-wife/husband.
Matthew 22:39 "And the second is like unto it, Thou shalt love thy neighbour as thyself." God's own "don't be a dick" rule.

Lithp and Vene really need to have some kind of confusing sexual encounter where Vene spends the entire session lovingly insulting Lithp's technique, then cums on his face, ruffles his hair, says, "You're all right, kid!", and then punches him in the nuts.

Art Vandelay

  • Guest
Re: What happens when a fundie writes fanfiction
« Reply #8 on: January 23, 2012, 05:44:54 am »
Could be worse, could be this monstrosity. WARNING: highly NSFW and not really safe for anything. My sanity crumbled when I first read it.
My hat goes off to the author. That is truly hilarious.
I couldn't even make it past the A/N. Though now it makes me want to write one where the Devil really is God's ex-wife/husband.
As long as it includes several extremely graphic sex scenes for no purpose other than to piss off any Christian readers, I say go for it.

Offline czechmate

  • Apprentice
  • **
  • Posts: 50
Re: What happens when a fundie writes fanfiction
« Reply #9 on: January 23, 2012, 05:47:50 am »
 :-\My Gast is Flabbered.

Offline starseeker

  • God
  • *****
  • Posts: 568
Re: What happens when a fundie writes fanfiction
« Reply #10 on: January 23, 2012, 06:23:30 am »
I am now being horribly reminded of this yaoi incest fanfic based on the Bible someone linked me. It had Cain and Abel as gay lovers. And then there was another one that had Jesus and Satan doing something my mind doesn't want to remember.

Offline kefkaownsall

  • The Beast
  • *****
  • Posts: 3253
  • Gender: Male
Re: What happens when a fundie writes fanfiction
« Reply #11 on: January 23, 2012, 06:45:16 am »
http://www.fanfiction.net/s/5102928/1/Harry_Potter_turns_to_the_Lord

It's so bad, it's mentioned in TVTropes' So Bad, It's Horrible/Fanfic page: http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Horrible/FanficE-H

Bonus points for the fact that the author himself actually reviewing the fic and calling it "A true masterpiece, worthy of Christ's blessing" even though Pride is considered the worst out of the 7 Deadly Sins.


I remember that one.  I couldnt tell if it was a troll or not
guess it wasnt

Offline Kain

  • God
  • *****
  • Posts: 542
  • Gender: Male
  • The Alkaline one
Re: What happens when a fundie writes fanfiction
« Reply #12 on: January 23, 2012, 09:21:34 am »
Yeeeeaaaahhhh, I'm not even gonna touch that.
In paranoia I find genius / But the ice-dreams have come
with spiritless consequence / A hatchet has been hidden
between my eyes / A hatchet gift-wrapped in paranoia / A
wooden heart never bleeds / A wooden heart never bleeds,
yet inextricable thoughts still weave / Introspection
fabricated for battle / No time has been wasted
/ Neuroleptic seconds marry electroconvulsive hours / In
the cranial freezer, paranoia is the bastard and I
find genius Petrify / Paralyze

Offline Shane for Wax

  • Official Mosin Nagant Fanboy, Crazy, and Lord of Androgynes
  • Kakarot
  • ******
  • Posts: I am a geek!!
  • Gender: Male
  • Twin to shy, lover of weapons, pagan, wolf-brother
    • Game Podunk
Re: What happens when a fundie writes fanfiction
« Reply #13 on: January 23, 2012, 09:31:14 am »
Could be worse, could be this monstrosity. WARNING: highly NSFW and not really safe for anything. My sanity crumbled when I first read it.
My hat goes off to the author. That is truly hilarious.

I couldn't even make it past the A/N. Though now it makes me want to write one where the Devil really is God's ex-wife/husband.

You mean he isn't?

&
"The human race. Greatest monsters of them all."
"Ke barjurir gar'ade, jagyc'ade kot'la a dalyc'ade kotla'shya."
Fucking Dalek twats I’m going to twat you over the head with my fucking TARDIS you fucking fucks!

Offline rosenewock21

  • The Snuffleupagus of the Satanic Sesame Street
  • God
  • *****
  • Posts: 585
  • Gender: Female
  • Holder of the sleepy time rag
Re: What happens when a fundie writes fanfiction
« Reply #14 on: January 23, 2012, 09:38:13 am »
Could be worse, could be this monstrosity. WARNING: highly NSFW and not really safe for anything. My sanity crumbled when I first read it.
My hat goes off to the author. That is truly hilarious.

I couldn't even make it past the A/N. Though now it makes me want to write one where the Devil really is God's ex-wife/husband.

You mean he isn't?

Hell, they might still be married. Ever read the book of Job? God is down right happy to see the devil when he shows up, asking where he's been, if he's well, that kind of thing. It can come off as "How was your day, honey" in the right light.
Matthew 22:39 "And the second is like unto it, Thou shalt love thy neighbour as thyself." God's own "don't be a dick" rule.

Lithp and Vene really need to have some kind of confusing sexual encounter where Vene spends the entire session lovingly insulting Lithp's technique, then cums on his face, ruffles his hair, says, "You're all right, kid!", and then punches him in the nuts.