Vending Machine

[Art Vandelay]

Yo get 200 cassette tapes.

I insert 25 megalitres of black waste water.

[Random Dinosaur]

You get a giant mutant trout.

I insert my dick.

[pyro]

You get an orgasm.

I insert a water bottle.

[Art Vandelay]

You get a repair bill for one water damaged vending machine.

I insert a pair of used panties.

[ironbite]

You get slapped by an irate schoolgirl who looks like she's 21 but really only 15.

Ironbite-I insert El Generico, the Generic Luchador.

[Random Dinosaur]

You get a burrito.

I insert a Bible.

[pyro]

You get a koran

I insert cannabis

[Art Vandelay]

You get cantabis, cannabis's less motivated cousin.

I insert a jar of my taint sweat.

[Random Dinosaur]

You get a hazmat team.

I insert Uranus.

[rookie]

You get an asteroid lodged in Uranus.

I insert a 30 year old Hot Wheels toy car.

[pyro]

You get an asteroid lodged in Uranus.

I insert a 30 year old Hot Wheels toy car.

You get a matchbox car.

I insert bni.hlqwkpwqbvnenralstuqwfp.

[Art Vandelay]

You get enough obscure references to buy one whole weed.

I insert a handful of dog hair.

[Eiki-mun]

You get a small (100 ml) bottle of Smirnoff vodka.

I insert a tiny, but fully detailed and intricate model of a T-34 tank.

[Random Dinosaur]

You get run over by a real T-34 tank.

I insert my dog.

[rookie]

You get my dog.

I insert a family portrait from 1986.