Limbaugh: Obama, Al Qaeda in cahoots to assassinate bin Laden

[Lt. Fred]

Seriously.

The Republicans have had an ontological problem for about a year now. Obama, being both black, a Democrat and named Hussein, must be allied with America's enemies. Unfortunately, Obama is also the guy who's goons blew away the greatest among those enemies, Usama bin Laden. Seriously, they shot him in the face, it was pretty awesome. Despite telling everyone for decades that they were the only party that could be trusted to do this- just look at the flag on my lapel!- the Republicans themselves were unable to achieve this mighty feat.

Therefore, the fuck? Cognitive dissonance!

Well, Professor Rush Limbaugh finally has an explanation: Al Qaeda helped Obama assassinate it's own leader in order to help him win another term in office, when he'll finally declare himself a Muslim from Kenya and close Guantanamo or something.

He had a courier going back and forth, but Al-Qaeda was not depending on Osama bin Laden for operational leadership. His day had come and gone. So he's expendable. He was near death anyway from diabetes or something. He needed dialysis. So they give him up; they give up his location. We go in and SEAL Team 6 gets him. Obama puffs up. "I killed Osama! I did it! I killed him!"

He gets instant credibility and gives himself some political capital.

http://www.rushlimbaugh.com/daily/2012/09/12/caller_nails_it_if_obama_is_so_concerned_with_feelings_in_the_muslim_world_why_is_he_bragging_so_much_about_killing_osama

[davedan]

Fred, not that I doubt you but because I want to read more on this, what's the source for this?

They're just pulling shit out of their arses now aren't they.

[Lt. Fred]

Fred, not that I doubt you but because I want to read more on this, what's the source for this?

They're just pulling shit out of their arses now aren't they.

I can't believe I didn't cite the damn source. That is such a rookie error. Added to original post in one second.

[KZN02]

I remember saying something earlier about GOP being in cahoots with Al Qaeda.

[Osama bin Bambi]

[ironbite]

rush might actually be right for once.  but for all the wrong reasons.  follow me camera guy.  aq has been hiding their leader since 9/11.  maybe they finally got tired of spending money on his old wrinkly ass and leaked the info.  wait...

ironbite-yeah still doesn't make sense

[Witchyjoshy]

...Funny junk again?

[Sylvana]

rush might actually be right for once.  but for all the wrong reasons.  follow me camera guy.  aq has been hiding their leader since 9/11.  maybe they finally got tired of spending money on his old wrinkly ass and leaked the info.  wait...

ironbite-yeah still doesn't make sense

Well there is another option.
Al Qaeda just decided that looking after him was too much overhead and he was not actually contributing anything to the movement anymore after 9/11. Hence it is not so much working with the American government as it is finally just ending their protection and letting him die.
Another option is that Al Qaeda realized that the American government in the hands of the republicans would forever use Osama bin Laden as a bogeyman to justify their wars and military presence in the middle east. With Osama dead, they wont have a convenient excuse anymore to just invade another country and thus Osamas death weakened the military freedom of America in the region.

Of course both of these gives the organization way too much credit. Especially considering groups like Al Qaeda are fanatically loyal and would never give up one of their heroes. Similarly with the recent success in killing off Al Qaeda leadership they would probably be wanting to keep Osama alive as he would have been one of the few big wigs still alive at the time.

Conspiracy theories are fun.

[Yla]

Another option is that Al Qaeda realized that the American government in the hands of the republicans would forever use Osama bin Laden as a bogeyman to justify their wars and military presence in the middle east. With Osama dead, they wont have a convenient excuse anymore to just invade another country and thus Osamas death weakened the military freedom of America in the region.

Conspiracy theories are fun.

Also, American activity ends up driving recruits to Al Qaeda, so it's beneficial to them.

[Tolpuddle Martyr]

Conspiracy theories are fun.

I'm surprised the Loose Change nutters haven't read all sorts of nefariousness into this.

Deliciously ironic since Limbaugh told that particular bunch of crazy conspiracy nuts they needed rehab and now he's spinning mad little theories of his own. 

[R. U. Sirius]

Shouldn't Limbaugh be floating through the ionosphere by now? He's got enough hot air.

[rookie]

*conspiracy theory*

Huh. Not bad. My own pet conspiracy theory is a bit different. Kind of mirrors the one where we sent our own planes into the buildings on 9/11. The powers that be gave bin Laden up as a martyr, as kind of a rally point for recruiting and fundraising.

That said, we need to stop paying attention to Rush. It's getting harder and harder for me to dredge up enough respect to capitalize the R in his name. Seriously, every time he goes on the air, the world is worse off for it.

[Lt. Fred]

Conspiracy theories are fun.

I'm surprised the Loose Change nutters

I'm surprised they haven't exploited the stories about Bush's negligent refusal to pay attention to the CIA's warnings in the run up to the attacks.

[shykid]

Seriously, Rush, less Oxycontin, moar antipsychotics.

[Meshakhad]

My own conspiracy theory is that a bunch of Muslim extremists hijacked a few airliners and flew them into the World Trade Center and the Pentagon. They were going to hit another target in DC, but the passengers retook the plane and crashed it in a field in Pennsylvania.

...wait a minute...