Author Topic: Church plans to bless AR-15s  (Read 355 times)

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Offline dpareja

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Church plans to bless AR-15s
« on: February 23, 2018, 05:45:21 pm »
http://thetimes-tribune.com/news/controversial-wayne-county-church-urges-couples-to-bring-ar-15-rifles-to-blessing-ceremony-1.2304229

World Peace and Unification Sanctuary in Newfoundland, Pennsylvania, is putting on a dinner at which they encourage attendees to bring semi-automatic rifles (or gun store vouchers in the event that they cannot obtain such a weapon before the event) so that the weapons can be blessed.
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Offline niam2023

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Re: Church plans to bless AR-15s
« Reply #1 on: February 23, 2018, 09:38:07 pm »
Dumbasses, that's for the Adeptus Mechanicus to do, not the Ministorum!
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Offline Art Vandelay

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Re: Church plans to bless AR-15s
« Reply #2 on: February 23, 2018, 09:38:47 pm »
What exactly is that supposed to achieve? Is it going to make the bullets more lethal? Will it make it more accurate? Less likely to jam? Give it the ability to automatically track fleeing school kids?

This whole practice of Christians blessing things is fucking weird.
« Last Edit: February 23, 2018, 10:44:41 pm by Art Vandelay »

Offline dpareja

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Re: Church plans to bless AR-15s
« Reply #3 on: February 23, 2018, 10:24:30 pm »
Dumbasses, that's for the Adeptus Mechanicus to do, not the Ministorum!

Well, as I saw it put...

Quote
That seems wasteful. They'd have better luck just blessing the person holding the weapon.

After all, Bless Weapon only grants bypassing of DR against evil creatures, whereas Bless adds a 5-20% chance to-hit, depending on the edition.
Quote from: Jordan Duram
It doesn't concern you, Sister, that kind of absolutist view of the universe? Right and wrong determined solely by a single all-knowing, all powerful being whose judgment cannot be questioned and in whose name the most horrendous acts can be sanctioned without appeal?

Quote from: Supreme Court of Canada
Being required by someone else’s religious beliefs to behave contrary to one’s sexual identity is degrading and disrespectful.

Offline Lana Reverse

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Re: Church plans to bless AR-15s
« Reply #4 on: February 23, 2018, 11:18:03 pm »
Are they planning a new crusade?
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Offline niam2023

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Re: Church plans to bless AR-15s
« Reply #5 on: February 23, 2018, 11:26:55 pm »
Are they planning a new crusade?

Yes. We've got to get Mortarion off those freaking planets, he's a menace!
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Offline Askold

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Re: Church plans to bless AR-15s
« Reply #6 on: February 24, 2018, 02:12:41 am »
But that's an East-European thing: https://polishpriests.tumblr.com/

No matter what happens, no matter what my last words may end up being, I want everyone to claim that they were:
"If you strike me down, I shall become more powerful than you could possibly imagine."
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Offline Sigmaleph

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Re: Church plans to bless AR-15s
« Reply #7 on: March 01, 2018, 05:57:43 pm »
What exactly is that supposed to achieve? Is it going to make the bullets more lethal? Will it make it more accurate? Less likely to jam? Give it the ability to automatically track fleeing school kids?

This whole practice of Christians blessing things is fucking weird.

i'm even more curious what happens when you bless a gun store voucher. is it...better at being a voucher? do you get a more expensive gun than you paid for?
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Offline davedan

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Re: Church plans to bless AR-15s
« Reply #8 on: March 01, 2018, 07:05:52 pm »
Obviously by blessing the voucher it is more likely to be accepted after the expiry date and the voucher provider is less likely to enter bankruptcy.

Offline rookie

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Re: Church plans to bless AR-15s
« Reply #9 on: March 02, 2018, 07:36:54 pm »
Oh Lord, please place your blessing on these guns that they might shoot up mine, I mean thine, enemies for that they mitt meet you and see then that I'm, I mean you're right. Amen.

Now somebody dig up Eric Idle blessing the holy hand grenade of Antioch.
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Offline dpareja

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Re: Church plans to bless AR-15s
« Reply #10 on: March 02, 2018, 07:48:57 pm »
Oh Lord, please place your blessing on these guns that they might shoot up mine, I mean thine, enemies for that they mitt meet you and see then that I'm, I mean you're right. Amen.

Now somebody dig up Eric Idle blessing the holy hand grenade of Antioch.

Ask and ye shall receive.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xOrgLj9lOwk
Quote from: Jordan Duram
It doesn't concern you, Sister, that kind of absolutist view of the universe? Right and wrong determined solely by a single all-knowing, all powerful being whose judgment cannot be questioned and in whose name the most horrendous acts can be sanctioned without appeal?

Quote from: Supreme Court of Canada
Being required by someone else’s religious beliefs to behave contrary to one’s sexual identity is degrading and disrespectful.