Not made with actual lesbian, independent, feminist, communist girls.

[The Illusive Man]

Meet Kevin Swanson, aspiring champion of DERP.

Swanson: The individualism of feminism has been devastating to this country. I’d say you ought to say no the Girl Scout cookies too. I don’t want to support lesbianism, I don’t want to support Planned Parenthood and I don’t want to support abortion, and if that be the case I’m not buying Girl Scout cookies. Now I suppose if you take a big, fat, black magic marker and you say, ‘give me that box,’ and you start marking out all of the references to the Girl Scouts of America on all the boxes then maybe we’re not promoting that organization anymore and I’d be willing to buy it. Maybe it’s not food offered to idols anymore if I had the opportunity to scratch out references to the Girl Scouts of America on the boxes of the Girl Scout cookies offered to me at Safeway.

I think we understand why Barack Obama is President of the United States. He is incredibly popular with single women, incredibly popular. In fact, if you want a communist in the White House in the year 2020 you have got to get more daughters raised with the worldview, the independent mindset, the worldview that is presented by the Girl Scouts of America. We’re going to go to the Girl Scouts of America because if you talk about Chevrolet, apple pie and America, if you want to talk about what America is all about, you’re talking about the Girl Scouts. These people show up every year about this time of year selling their cookies outside of the grocery stores across America.

[Dakota Bob]

They keep saying "communism", but I don't think they know what it means.

[Flying Mint Bunny!]

What's his problem with the Girl Scouts?

[Indikins]

...Sometimes, Girl Scout cookies are just Girl Scout cookies.

They keep saying "communism", but I don't think they know what it means.

Of course they don't know, or they'd have to spend energy on thoughts.

[Old Viking]

Girl Scout cookies?  This guy is out whompin' on Girl Scout cookies?

[Stormwarden]

So buy an extra box and send one to him. And do record the reaction he gives.

[Alehksunos]

What's his problem with the Girl Scouts?

Abortion and reproductive rights, feminism and both gender and sexual egalitarianism, and the funny ideas of "Communism" that has for the longest fucking time is still sweeping up and about our nation (god, when will we move on at long last?).

[Ghoti]

So buy an extra box and send one to him. And do record the reaction he gives.

And waste a perfectly good box of cookies?

In that case, I'll send him a box of those nasty peanut butter sandwiches.

[largeham]

I want a communist in the White House in 2020

Sometimes I wish what the right was saying was actually true, e.g. we are on the verge of a communist takeover.

[Rabbit of Caerbannog]

I was just munching away on Thin Mints and the next thing I knew I was leafing through a copy of The Communist Manifesto. Funny how that works.

[lord gibbon]

I was just munching away on Thin Mints and the next thing I knew I was leafing through a copy of The Communist Manifesto. Funny how that works.

You think that's bad? I ate a few and somehow ended up taking part in the Russian Revolution.

I really need to get my time connection looked at, I think it's on the fritz.

[Meshakhad]

I ate 10 boxes of Thin Mints. Guess what happened?

[Witchyjoshy]

I ate 10 boxes of Thin Mints. Guess what happened?

Are you Marx now?

[Canadian Mojo]

I ate 10 boxes of Thin Mints. Guess what happened?

You grew a kick-ass mustache and started purging your rivals.

[Ghoti]

I ate 10 boxes of Thin Mints. Guess what happened?

Diabetes?