Author Topic: Wishes Will Be Corrupted  (Read 364043 times)

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Offline Osama bin Bambi

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Re: Wishes Will Be Corrupted
« Reply #300 on: February 03, 2012, 09:13:05 pm »
Granted. But the work you did is shitty and you flunk all your classes and die alone.

I wish my back didn't hurt right now.
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Offline Cataclysm

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Re: Wishes Will Be Corrupted
« Reply #301 on: February 03, 2012, 10:17:13 pm »
Granted. You ignore the problem and it gets worse.

I wish I had Pinkie Sense.
I'd be more sympathetic if people here didn't act like they knew what they were saying when they were saying something very much wrong.

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Offline Meshakhad

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Re: Wishes Will Be Corrupted
« Reply #302 on: February 04, 2012, 02:07:44 am »
Granted. You ignore the problem and it gets worse.

I wish I had Pinkie Sense.

Granted. You can now sense your own pinkie.

I wish I had a sammich.
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Re: Wishes Will Be Corrupted
« Reply #303 on: February 04, 2012, 02:33:30 am »
Granted, but Newt Gingrich used it to wipe his ass.

I wish I wish for some salami.

Offline Her3tiK

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Re: Wishes Will Be Corrupted
« Reply #304 on: February 04, 2012, 09:43:13 pm »
Granted, but Newt Gingrich used it to wipe his ass.

I wish I wish for some salami.
Granted, it's from Meshakhad's sammich.

I wish my bass was properly set up.
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Offline Meshakhad

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Re: Wishes Will Be Corrupted
« Reply #305 on: February 05, 2012, 10:14:33 am »
Granted. Your bass fish is properly set up, whatever the hell that means.

I wish I had a holodeck.
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Offline jumpingjackflash

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Re: Wishes Will Be Corrupted
« Reply #306 on: February 06, 2012, 05:17:07 am »
Granted. But on its first use the electricity supply is short-circuited, causing it to fail.

I wish I didn't have to pay for my WoW subscription.
Ok seriously, is nobody even going to try and avenge my man-burrito?

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Re: Wishes Will Be Corrupted
« Reply #307 on: February 06, 2012, 05:36:08 am »
Granted, but you have to pay for your air instead.

I wish for steak.

Offline Captain Jack Harkness

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Re: Wishes Will Be Corrupted
« Reply #308 on: February 06, 2012, 01:17:23 pm »
Wish granted.  You have a horribly charred steak.

I wish for bullet-time skills.
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Offline e13

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Re: Wishes Will Be Corrupted
« Reply #309 on: February 06, 2012, 01:35:15 pm »
Wish granted.  You have a horribly charred steak.

I wish for bullet-time skills.
Granted. When you get shot with bullets, they hit you in a 6/8 time signature.

I wish I'd stop making such horrible wishes.

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Offline N. De Plume

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Re: Wishes Will Be Corrupted
« Reply #310 on: February 06, 2012, 01:58:58 pm »
Granted. You make horrible wishes of a totally different kind.

I wish I could blink and have my stuff automatically packed for the move.
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Offline Captain Jack Harkness

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Re: Wishes Will Be Corrupted
« Reply #311 on: February 06, 2012, 02:26:12 pm »
Granted. You make horrible wishes of a totally different kind.

I wish I could blink and have my stuff automatically packed for the move.

Wish granted.  You blink and nothing's packed - because you now have nothing.

I wish fundies would give up waiting for the rapture.
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Offline Jack Bauer

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Re: Wishes Will Be Corrupted
« Reply #312 on: February 06, 2012, 08:02:02 pm »
Granted. They rename 'rapture' to 'departure' - they're still waiting.

I wish the new cat from the house down the road would stop using my porch as its personal toilet. (That's 'porch', not 'Porsche'!)
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Offline Osama bin Bambi

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Re: Wishes Will Be Corrupted
« Reply #313 on: February 06, 2012, 08:03:36 pm »
Granted. It uses your bed instead.

I wish I didn't have so much social anxiety.
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Offline GLaDOS

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Re: Wishes Will Be Corrupted
« Reply #314 on: February 06, 2012, 08:10:31 pm »
granted, you are now absolutely shameless, and get arrested for disturbing the peace.

I wish everyone would come back.
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