Author Topic: Wishes Will Be Corrupted  (Read 363814 times)

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Offline ThunderWulf

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Re: Wishes Will Be Corrupted
« Reply #1275 on: December 23, 2012, 12:41:21 am »
Granted, but it attracts every predator in the area for a month.

I wish for unlimited sushi.
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Offline Captain Jack Harkness

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Re: Wishes Will Be Corrupted
« Reply #1276 on: December 23, 2012, 12:05:55 pm »
Wish granted.  You suffocate in sushi.  Also it tastes like fucking shit.

I wish I could permanently get rid of one of my bad habits with no effort.

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Offline dpareja

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Re: Wishes Will Be Corrupted
« Reply #1277 on: December 23, 2012, 12:09:03 pm »
Granted. Three others, all worse, replace it.

I wish that people would accept that both sides of the gun control debate have valid points.
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Being required by someone else’s religious beliefs to behave contrary to one’s sexual identity is degrading and disrespectful.

Offline Captain Jack Harkness

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Re: Wishes Will Be Corrupted
« Reply #1278 on: December 23, 2012, 12:13:27 pm »
Wish granted.  These people are promptly shot.

I wish I lived somewhere warm without snow.
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Offline Zygarde

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Re: Wishes Will Be Corrupted
« Reply #1279 on: December 23, 2012, 05:48:49 pm »
Granted welcome to my hell hole town hope you enjoy random shootings, the possibility of getting mugged and a corrupt state government with no end in sight.


I wish I could get my gender reassignment surgery sooner rather than later.

Offline dpareja

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Re: Wishes Will Be Corrupted
« Reply #1280 on: December 23, 2012, 05:50:31 pm »
Granted. Your doctor sucks and botches it horribly.

I wish all the various Linux distributions had proper compatibility with each other.
Quote from: Jordan Duram
It doesn't concern you, Sister, that kind of absolutist view of the universe? Right and wrong determined solely by a single all-knowing, all powerful being whose judgment cannot be questioned and in whose name the most horrendous acts can be sanctioned without appeal?

Quote from: Supreme Court of Canada
Being required by someone else’s religious beliefs to behave contrary to one’s sexual identity is degrading and disrespectful.

Offline Auggziliary

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Re: Wishes Will Be Corrupted
« Reply #1281 on: December 23, 2012, 05:54:11 pm »
Granted. Your doctor sucks and botches it horribly.

I wish all the various Linux distributions had proper compatibility with each other.

Granted. They all fall in love and have sex all the time, and your computer is ruined.

I wish I could sew.
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Offline R. U. Sirius

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Re: Wishes Will Be Corrupted
« Reply #1282 on: December 23, 2012, 07:17:20 pm »
Granted. You sew your fingers together by accident.

I wish for a job working at a dog kennel.
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If you look at it logically, cannibalism has great potential to simultaneously solve our overpopulation and food shortage problems.

Offline ThunderWulf

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Re: Wishes Will Be Corrupted
« Reply #1283 on: December 23, 2012, 07:47:01 pm »
Granted, but every dog is constantly trying to hump you.

I wish that my family would quit bitching about me wanting to grow my beard long.
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"it's kind of like my right left hand on a sunday every night. How so? It beats the fuck out of me!" ~ Saturn500
"Drinking, fighting, fucking...they basically outlawed 99% of the lifestyle of your typical Irishman.  Much less your typical Viking." ~ RavynousHunter

Offline R. U. Sirius

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Re: Wishes Will Be Corrupted
« Reply #1284 on: December 23, 2012, 07:58:40 pm »
Granted. Now they're bitching about how you keep your pubes.

I wish for a hot, smart, nice girlfriend.
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If you look at it logically, cannibalism has great potential to simultaneously solve our overpopulation and food shortage problems.

Offline Auggziliary

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Re: Wishes Will Be Corrupted
« Reply #1285 on: December 23, 2012, 08:10:49 pm »
Granted. Now they're bitching about how you keep your pubes.

I wish for a hot, smart, nice girlfriend.

Granted, she's the most intelligent and friendly woman you've ever met. You fall deeply in love, but then she bursts into flames and dies an agonizing death because she's so fucking hot.

I wish for a new pair of pants.
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Offline R. U. Sirius

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Re: Wishes Will Be Corrupted
« Reply #1286 on: December 23, 2012, 08:53:58 pm »
Granted. You split the back seam the first time you bend over.

I wish steampunk was real.
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If you look at it logically, cannibalism has great potential to simultaneously solve our overpopulation and food shortage problems.

Offline Sigmaleph

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Re: Wishes Will Be Corrupted
« Reply #1287 on: December 23, 2012, 09:53:15 pm »
Granted. Steampunk is a real literary genre. It's not real in any other way, though.

I wish I had a moon base.
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Offline ThunderWulf

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Re: Wishes Will Be Corrupted
« Reply #1288 on: December 23, 2012, 11:53:53 pm »
Granted, but it's the size of NYC and you have to staff it by yourself while thousands of people are constantly nagging at you about their problems on the station.

I wish I had more money for tattoos right now.
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Offline Auggziliary

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Re: Wishes Will Be Corrupted
« Reply #1289 on: December 24, 2012, 12:57:00 am »
Granted. You get a million dollars, get the best tattoo ever tattooed. Well, it would be the best, except it's spelled wrong.

I wish I had a piercing gun.
BITCHES! YOU BITCHES! Killing me won't bring back your God damn honey!