FSTDT Forums
Community => The Lounge => Topic started by: Osama bin Bambi on May 15, 2012, 10:43:00 pm
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So this thread is for all the creative insults that you've come up with besides the typical "FUCK YOU MOTHERFUCKER!"
Admittedly I'm a bit short on creative insults right now except for "Go suck a snake dick."
Also applicable to this thread are impressive insults that you've come across in movies, songs, etc.
But no personal attacks against other users. That's not what this thread's about, obviously.
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You fuckstreak of piss.
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I know "Jump up your own ass and die!" isn't that creative, but I enjoy using it because of the image it provides.
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You post and try images that arent humanly possible and except us to think them up!
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Must not post Monty Python...
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If Christians really start to bug me I'll call them Christers
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I like to extend the DIAF series:
"Get an STD, then die in a fire on a sinking boat in shark infested waters dressed as a clown wearing opposite sex underwear."
Then there are the windowshitters.... I like the combo:
"Clownshoe asshat windowshitter."
"Couldn't keep your head above the liquid level in a turdburglar stew."
"You're the sort of perv who goes around sniffing little girls' bicycle saddles."
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I'd tell you to kiss my ass, but you aren't worthy.
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More of a curse than an insult, but:
May you never receive a gift that pleases you.
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Yesterday I tried to write a poem about you, but I couldn't think of anything that rhymes with "Pencil Neck Geek"
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While insults with lots of profanity have their place and time, I also like the subtle ones and the ones that are said deadpan. Any Groucho Marx movie/show will have tons of them.
"I think you'll go very far. Why don't you start now?"
"I'll never forget a face, but in your case, I'll make an exception."
EDIT: Mae West and W. C. Fields were good at them too.
I'm an old movie buff, what can I say?
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Yesterday I tried to write a poem about you, but I couldn't think of anything that rhymes with "Pencil Neck Geek"
Well, then, obviously you haven't heard the song (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JNM4atakanI).
Also, I noticed that lately I've developed an odd habit of calling anyone who annoys me "Charlie Brown".
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While I annoyed, I blurted out "Shit Igloo!" the other day.
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I'd rather suck the contents out of a week-old used condom than spend one more second listening to you.
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The greatest Cluster F Bomb ever.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7gVVWznIM-o
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You little chunk of nipple.
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You fight like a cow!
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I hope your own children hate you
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You are just so precious!
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I particularly like job references with double meanings:
You'll be extremely lucky to have him work for you.
Nobody would fill the position better than he would.
I'll be overjoyed to see him move on with his career.
His job performance is second to none.
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I'd rather suck farts out of a dog's anus.
I'd rather fuck a porcupine and shove a cactus up my ass.
I'd rather slurp shit oozing out of a warthog's anus hole.
I'd rather lick the shit skid off the inside of a toilet bowl.
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I'd rather suck farts out of a dog's anus.
I'd rather fuck a porcupine and shove a cactus up my ass.
I'd rather slurp shit oozing out of a warthog's anus hole.
I'd rather lick the shit skid off the inside of a toilet bowl.
You stole those from AVGN, didn't you?
You boring, uncreative, shameless twat. (Am I doing it right?)
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I'd rather suck farts out of a dog's anus.
I'd rather fuck a porcupine and shove a cactus up my ass.
I'd rather slurp shit oozing out of a warthog's anus hole.
I'd rather lick the shit skid off the inside of a toilet bowl.
You stole those from AVGN, didn't you?
You boring, uncreative, shameless twat. (Am I doing it right?)
What can I say, it would be easier to pick fly shit out of pepper while wearing boxing gloves than to come up with something original.
Also, "heinously anus" makes for an amusing way to describe something/someone you dislike.
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You've got a face like a smashed crab.
May your ears turn into arseholes and shit on your shoulders.
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Did you intend for those words to come out of your mouth in that order, or did they just randomly tumble out that way?
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He's constantly plagued with window-shitters. I think he's had a lot of practice.
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Are you typically this stupid or are you putting on a special effort for me today?
I'm blonde/autistic/disabled. What's your excuse?
Hi, your village called. They're looking for their idiot.
I see that where you are from, intelligence isn't only unvalued but actively discouraged.
I could eat a bowl of alphabet soup and shit a better argument than that.
Thank you for confirming my choice to never procreate. Now if only your parents had reached a similar decision...
Out of millions of sperm, you were the one that won the race?
The night your mother should have swallowed...
Somebody said you weren't fit to fuck pigs. I defended you - I believe you are.
I'm impressed. Somehow you used perfect spelling, grammar and sentence structure but still managed to sound completely incoherent.