Background: I wear makeup fairly regularly now, when I feel like looking nice, but I didn't start wearing it until I was twenty and didn't really go full-on painted lady until two or three years ago.
So I'm quite mercifully unburdened by the stereotypical female anxiety about being seen without makeup on. Lately I've found myself feeling a little self-conscious without it, but it was one of those very rare circumstances under which I could rationally waylay my fear by attributing my worries to my shit self-esteem and assured myself that I was only judging myself way harsher than reality allowed for. And that was that, until this evening.
I work in a store two towns away from where I live, and there's another of the same store about five minutes from my apartment, so I only ever go to work when I actually have a shift. Since I don't want to give anyone the impression I don't give a fuck about what I look like, I wear makeup when I'm working and no one there has actually seen me without it. Again, I thought NOTHING of this and wasn't the least embarrassed about going in unpainted today to pick up my hours. On my way out, one of the teenagers who works there spotted me and came out with this gem:
"Oh my gosh! You look TERRIBLE! Oh, no, I don't mean it in a bad way, I just mean... you look really sick is all, are you okay?"
I told her I was totally fine and that this is just how I look without makeup. She apologized profusely right away and was really embarrassed at having said it. She's one of those girls who's just really really nice to everybody and doesn't have anything critical to say about ANYONE, so the fact that I looked so haggard that it startled an honest remark like that from her says a lot more than the words alone say.
One of those situations where I just have to laugh or I'm gonna slit my throat.