Author Topic: ShitThatDidn'tHappen.txt  (Read 7356 times)

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Offline VirtualStranger

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ShitThatDidn'tHappen.txt
« on: August 20, 2012, 10:57:11 pm »
You know those chain stories your grandmother posts on Facebook and forewords to your E-mail? The ones that usually end in "And then everyone in the room erupted into cheers"? The ones that very clearly never actually happened?

Well this thread is about those. Because they're hilarious.

This one is a classic:
(click to show/hide)

And here's the parody version of the above:
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Here's one from the other end of the religious spectrum:
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This one shows up on my facebook wall all the fucking time.
(click to show/hide)

And this is some nerd's revenge fantasy:
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I think this speaks for itself:
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Offline SpaceProg

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Re: ShitThatDidn'tHappen.txt
« Reply #1 on: August 21, 2012, 12:54:18 am »
Man they really do 'erupt into cheers' or the like a lot, don't they?  I think they need to come up with some new stuff...

Art Vandelay

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Re: ShitThatDidn'tHappen.txt
« Reply #2 on: August 21, 2012, 02:01:39 am »
People dress up as Batman and Master Chief to go to an anime convention, huh? Methinks the author of that particular story didn't quite think it through.

Offline DarkfireTaimatsu

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Re: ShitThatDidn'tHappen.txt
« Reply #3 on: August 21, 2012, 02:06:47 am »
People dress up as Batman and Master Chief to go to an anime convention, huh? Methinks the author of that particular story didn't quite think it through.

But there's a Batman manga...
A limerick:

There once was a unicorn who would shove
His rainbows around like a dove
"Always I'll be with you
And then make-believe with you
Harmony, Harmony, oh love"

Offline Zygarde

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Re: ShitThatDidn'tHappen.txt
« Reply #4 on: August 21, 2012, 02:10:44 am »
n
People dress up as Batman and Master Chief to go to an anime convention, huh? Methinks the author of that particular story didn't quite think it through.

Theres an anime based off Halo called Halo Legends.

Art Vandelay

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Re: ShitThatDidn'tHappen.txt
« Reply #5 on: August 21, 2012, 02:13:26 am »
I stand corrected. I suppose if they'll make an anime based on Twilight, they'll make anime based on anything.

Offline davedan

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Re: ShitThatDidn'tHappen.txt
« Reply #6 on: August 21, 2012, 02:16:18 am »
Hmmmm.
« Last Edit: August 21, 2012, 02:18:39 am by davedan »

Offline The Right Honourable Mlle Antéchrist

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Re: ShitThatDidn'tHappen.txt
« Reply #7 on: August 21, 2012, 02:39:51 am »
Similar to the professor story you posted, there's these two:

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I'm sure we've all come across this one at one time or another:

(click to show/hide)

And finally, one of those "patron tells off diners in restaurant for disagreeing with war" stories:

(click to show/hide)
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Offline Captain Jack Harkness

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Re: ShitThatDidn'tHappen.txt
« Reply #8 on: August 21, 2012, 06:34:09 am »
Ah, self-serving anecdotes.  Nothing like the old ego stroking, eh?  I must say that these stories are...interesting.  Maybe when I come up with something to contribute I'll add to this.
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Offline Stick Boy

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Re: ShitThatDidn'tHappen.txt
« Reply #9 on: August 21, 2012, 09:37:17 am »
There have been quite a few Chick-Fil-A ones showing up on my facebook wall about the kindness of the employees - absolutely no way to verify if they're true or not - they're getting into the 100,000+ likes range - personally, I think they're bullshit since they didn't start showing up until after the boycott started, but then again, they could be real - the employees aren't the evil ones, they're just trying to make a living. 
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Offline StallChaser

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Re: ShitThatDidn'tHappen.txt
« Reply #10 on: August 23, 2012, 03:35:45 am »
I don't have the actual thing, so I'm paraphrasing here:

(click to show/hide)

Offline chad sexington

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Re: ShitThatDidn'tHappen.txt
« Reply #11 on: August 23, 2012, 03:45:17 am »

Offline MaybeNever

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Re: ShitThatDidn'tHappen.txt
« Reply #12 on: August 23, 2012, 03:59:25 am »
LIKE AND SHARE IF YOU ARE AGAINST RACISM!

Wow, what a bold stance to take.
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Offline gyeonghwa

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Re: ShitThatDidn'tHappen.txt
« Reply #13 on: August 23, 2012, 02:12:02 pm »
Quote
The Marine calmly replied, 'GOD was too busy today protecting America 's soldiers who are protecting your right to say stupid stuff and act like an idiot. So He sent me.'

Things to take away about God in this sentence:

1. He's not omnipotent.
2. He prefers violence.
3. He apparently thinks showing a professor who's boss is more important than, you know, stopping wars and poverty and stuff.
4. He's American.
5. He thinks the ACLU, which has multiple time defend the freedom of loud mouth Bible thumping douchbags, is an atheist organization.

tl;dr God: "Hurr durr I'm America you mean atheists!"
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Offline VirtualStranger

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Re: ShitThatDidn'tHappen.txt
« Reply #14 on: August 24, 2012, 06:03:06 pm »
(click to show/hide)

Yeah, because most people would totally accept that deal and not slap the shit out of him.