Author Topic: Michael and Debi Pearl.  (Read 11367 times)

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Offline Eniliad

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Re: Michael and Debi Pearl.
« Reply #45 on: January 19, 2012, 06:42:49 pm »
Maybe all copies of the book should be published with a foreword about how following the discipline techniques described therein constitute child abuse in many jurisdictions and have been linked to several cases of beating deaths of children.

The book can stay in print, but has to acknowledge that following those guidelines is NOT a good idea. Kind of in the same way cigarettes are still sold but have to carry a warning about how smoking them for a long time can kill you.

Problem: there are tons of copies of his book that are already in circulation without it. Besides, if those cig warnings don't stop people, I have little reason to believe a warning would actually do anything.
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Offline lighthorseman

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Re: Michael and Debi Pearl.
« Reply #46 on: January 19, 2012, 08:16:53 pm »
Actually, much like mandatory warnings on cigarette packets, l think thats a really good idea.
Let me make it real easy... if anyone is interested in my actual opinion, please ask, I'd love to talk to you. If you are interested in trying to catch me out in some sort of "gotcha, before you said 'many', but now you're saying 'lots', you totally shifted goal posts", then, I'm not playing.

Offline Radiation

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Re: Michael and Debi Pearl.
« Reply #47 on: January 20, 2012, 11:31:35 am »

People who buy and follow the advice of the Pearls are likely to already be people who would resort to beating their children as punishment.  Children being beaten to death happened before the Pearls published their book. Presumably some would still have happened regardless of the book being published. And they would have happened to people who are likely to beat their children, obviously, which are the Pearl's audience. So, it's perfectly possible that in a hypothetical universe where the Pearls never published their book, this same deaths happen to the same people, meaning that in fact the Pearls did not cause those deaths.

This. I have read To Train Up A Child and I believe in corporal punishment and discipline. I don't agree with everything in this book and I do believe that the Pearls sincerely think that they are providing sound advice and have a desire to help parents raise their kids effectively. Now, one of the problems is that they wrote their book based on their experience and their results and how it was successful for them and in doing so, wanted to share their techniques to the world. However, once they had their book published and put into the hands of the public, it is what the readers make out of it and how they implement his instructions. Some may be able to follow it within the guidelines and not cross the boundary of child abuse while others have gone overboard and actually harmed and even killed their kids. Those parents that stay within the reasonable boundaries are usually good parents and know that there are limitations on punishment. The other parents probably are the type that had an abusive personality in the first place.

In the book, Pearl often talks about not punishing your kids while you are angry but instead wait a few minutes and then punish them in a more calm and rational state of mind. I feel that many who have read this book and implementing the methods probably have punished their kids out of anger, causing more injury to the child. He also talks about discussing the punishment with the child afterwards, explain why and to let them know that you love them. IOW, I do believe that those that have gone overboard have probably skipped or forgot those parts.

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