Worst (Best?) Videogame Failures

[Shane for Wax]

I kept dying by running into a hail of gunfire. It only took me looking up how to do it that I realized that you can go around it. >.>

In RPGs I kept getting my butt handed to me in Legend of Dragoon. I apparently forgot how to turn into my Dragoon form.

Turn-Based Strategy? I forgot that someone better equipped even if you outnumber them can quickly slaughter you.

[Lithp]

Whenever I set up the game, I would always pick the title of some royalty, like King or Prince... whatever I felt like at the time. Only one little problem: That was the Difficulty Selection Screen.

God, I hate it when games do that. If you're going to give an option that affects the gameplay, explain to me what the fuck I'm doing. And no, referencing it in the manual does not count.

I got another one: I just found out that in 358/2 Days, you can turn off Roxas's Limit Break, move, & start it up again. The fact that you can't move while using Limit is one of my biggest reasons for calling him shit.

[Witchyjoshy]

So I'm playing Oblivion, as a Dunmer Spellsword in full heavy armor, I'm running around Skingrad, get into a fight with a Bandit wielding a greataxe... and then die in two hits.

:V Apparently, that bandit was a lot higher level than I was.

[Lithp]

I should extend this to failures that have personally been witnessed. I have a great story filled with fail & rage.

[Osama bin Bambi]

Once I was a cleric who forgot he could turn undead.

[Lithp]

If forgetting is a failure, then I fail every level of Portal.

Half of the time I forget I can shoot portals, & the other half of the time I forget I can do things BESIDES shooting portals.

[SpaceProg]

The ones that spring immediately to mind for me are:

1.  Silent Hill 3 --  I'm in the subway and I spy a red light down on the rails which I go to investigate.  I jump down and do so.  TRAIN HORN.   I run back toward the ledge to jump back up (and I know I'm able to do that at this time), and somehow the game glitches and I go INTO the platform.  Yes I'm running freely as normal, but only visible from about the waste up.   I can't get normal, and... the train still kills me.  When I'm 20 feet away from the tracks...
My first death in SH3

2. Morrowind GOTY -- I knew about the glitchfest the game was, but I didn't know it'd lead to total FAIL.  I went in a cave, killed a couple of bandits, then got stuck.  On a fence.  While some weak wizard guy was shooting me with magic woo-woo.  I couldn't move or defend myself and died pathetically.
...I don't have Morrowind GOTY anymore. 

[Lithp]

Alright, I'm going to tell that story from earlier, whether you want to hear it or not:

A while back, I was perusing the help forums on the Final Fantasy Wiki, & I saw a topic about FFVII: Crisis Core. I characterize myself as somewhat good at that game, so I go in to see what I can do to help. Little did I know that this topic was beyond my salvation.

The issue the OP was having was that he could not defeat the final boss, which isn't that big of a deal, Genesis Avatar is level 50-something, summons minions of a similar levl, & is an all-around asshole. But a lot of posters before me have already offered advice, so I'm reading through these to see if there's anything that hasn't been covered...& I'm noticing that they're telling him about things like the Jump Materia, attacking from behind to get Critical Hits, & a bunch of other things that you're supposed to learn after the first 2 or 3 levels. And a recurring theme is that he should go do missions to level up, which is sensible, because he's only about level 30.

But he's not hearing any of that, & after the 4th or 5th time it's suggested, he goes on this EPIC tirade about how the battle system is terrible because it doesn't pause while he's scrolling through the menu, how GOD FORBID he should have to grind ONCE in a JRPG, & a whole other bunch of shit that makes no sense. He then continues to say that he's only playing this "stupid game" because he's trying to write an FAQ on it.

So. He can't perform basic functions of the combat system, he refuses to do any of the sidequests, he doesn't know about the useful materia contained therein, indeed he probably can't even USE materia because of his problems with the menu system, &...he wants to advise other people on how to play this game?

For an added bonus, he kept calling the final boss "Mecha Genesis." Not only is this not his name, which he'd know if he was using the Scan Materia the game helpfully gives you early on, but it's clear from the storyline that the boss is in no sense a robot, so I don't know what orifice he pulled that from.

[Witchyjoshy]

There's those types of players in every gaming community, sadly :-/

[Lithp]

I sort of neglected to mention it, because I didn't think it was important at the time, but this wasn't just some anonymous nobody. He's a pretty prolific editor/guide-writer there. He might even be staff, I don't remember. That doesn't stop him from being an all-around wanker but that, I do think, is irrelevent.

[Witchyjoshy]

I sort of neglected to mention it, because I didn't think it was important at the time, but this wasn't just some anonymous nobody. He's a pretty prolific editor/guide-writer there. He might even be staff, I don't remember. That doesn't stop him from being an all-around wanker but that, I do think, is irrelevent.

Every community.  Even prolific editor/guide-writer community.

Though that makes it even sadder.

[Askold]

Once when I was playing call of duty (Can't remember which one) there is this level where you go destroy a power plant in a damn. Anyway several parts of the level are narrow corridors so you never know when an enemy is hiding behind the next corner, I was abusing the FUCK out of quicksave and occasionally this would cause a certain problem.

Basically I save the game and 0,5 seconds later get shot by a nazi who comes from behind the corner. Reload, jump to the left nope shot again. Reload, duck, didn't work. Reload, try to change my weapon (I was holding a stielhandgrenade when I saved.) nope too slow. Reload run up to the bastard and hit him with the grenade untill he stops moving. Well that did the trick.

[SpaceProg]

I was playing Halo: Reach with my cousin.  I'm a total newbie to any FPS type game, particularly Halo.  So, I'm just following him around and doing as he says.  He tells me to throw a grenade at a bunch of enemy goons that hadn't seen us yet.  I throw the grenade all right.   Right at our feet.   
Him:  NO, NOT THERE!
Me:  Aw, Dammit!
BOOOOOOM!
Dead.

[Her3tiK]

A friend was showing me how to play... I want to say Medal of Honor... in 1v1. Somehow, despite my ineptitude with any kind of FPS, I wipe the floor with him, but there was this one kill, where I unloaded on him at point blank range. He goes down, and my screen says "Press A to kick grenade". I stare at the screen like a deer in the headlights, say "Press A to kic- why would I do that?" and then the grenade my friend had dropped when I killed him exploded in my face.

[Shane for Wax]

Once when I was playing call of duty (Can't remember which one) there is this level where you go destroy a power plant in a damn. Anyway several parts of the level are narrow corridors so you never know when an enemy is hiding behind the next corner, I was abusing the FUCK out of quicksave and occasionally this would cause a certain problem.

Basically I save the game and 0,5 seconds later get shot by a nazi who comes from behind the corner. Reload, jump to the left nope shot again. Reload, duck, didn't work. Reload, try to change my weapon (I was holding a stielhandgrenade when I saved.) nope too slow. Reload run up to the bastard and hit him with the grenade untill he stops moving. Well that did the trick.

Sounds like the first one's 11th mission. It was a bitch.

I did a similar thing in MW2 towards the end.