The pilot episode of Agents of Shield told us that there's something fishy going on with Agent Coulson, regarding his apparent return from the dead, something which he, "Can never know." I have a theory.
Coulson is a Chitauri. *Dun dun duuuuun!*
We know from the comics that the Chitauri are shape-shifters (that's also my theory about who the mysterious bad guys disguised as police were), and we know from the beginning of the pilot that they have "neural link" technology.
After the battle of New York, there must have been tons of Chitauri technology scattered around the scene, not to mention bodies. Now, a lot of those Chitauri were perfectly healthy until their mothership got blown up, at which point they just dropped dead, because their neural link with the hive mind (I'm assuming, because that's the only way it makes sense to me) got severred.
So what if SHIELD used one of those neural link devices to download Coulson's mind into a mindless, but otherwise healthy, Chitauri body and forced it to shape-shift into Coulson's form?
Makes sense since Coulson seems more aggressive and less dweeby
Perhaps you missed it in Avengers when Tony tried to play Phil off by saying he had reached the Life Model Decoy of himself? That's what Coulson is. A super advanced LMD who'll become the Vision in Avengers 2.
Ironbite-got it now?>
Tumblr delivers:
(http://media-cache-ak3.pinimg.com/736x/71/9d/85/719d85a2ba7ce170689a5b07529a6662.jpg)
Tumblr delivers:
(http://media-cache-ak3.pinimg.com/736x/71/9d/85/719d85a2ba7ce170689a5b07529a6662.jpg)
While a fascinating theory, it doesn't explain what's the thing he can never know.
If Coulson is super-serumed, he would know. You can't really expect him not to notice that he looks significantly younger than he should be.
Plus, I don't think it fits thematically with the series. From what I've heard, Whedon wants to make it about how the non-superpowered deal with a world with gods and aliens flying around. It seems like it would rather undercut that point to give Coulson superpowers
Sam Jackson was yelling at him?
A clue!
Coulson's lost his muscle memory. That bodes well for either the Chitauri or the robot theory, since either way, it wouldn't be his original body any more. But then May remarks that he's "rusty." Robot clue, perhaps?
Tumblr delivers:
(http://media-cache-ak3.pinimg.com/736x/71/9d/85/719d85a2ba7ce170689a5b07529a6662.jpg)
While a fascinating theory, it doesn't explain what's the thing he can never know.
If Coulson is super-serumed, he would know. You can't really expect him not to notice that he looks significantly younger than he should be.
Plus, I don't think it fits thematically with the series. From what I've heard, Whedon wants to make it about how the non-superpowered deal with a world with gods and aliens flying around. It seems like it would rather undercut that point to give Coulson superpowers
It wouldn't undercut Whedon's point, because Coulson doesn't have super powers. The super serum only worked once, and since then there were various unsuccessful attempts to replicate it. People have tried everything up to and including gamma radiation, so why is it so far-fetched that Coulson could have a less-successful serum? Besides, he knew that the Avengers needed a strong motivation to work together, and a martyred hero is fits the bill.
It wouldn't undercut Whedon's point, because Coulson doesn't have super powers. The super serum only worked once, and since then there were various unsuccessful attempts to replicate it. People have tried everything up to and including gamma radiation, so why is it so far-fetched that Coulson could have a less-successful serum? Besides, he knew that the Avengers needed a strong motivation to work together, and a martyred hero is fits the bill.
I would say that crazy healing power that lets you survive being stabbed through the chest counts as a superpower. But, I will admit, that's debatable.
Regardless, the clues we've been given so far are:
A) that Coulson doesn't know that he actually died and came back somehow. Or at least SHIELD thinks Coulson doesn't know. It'd be hard for him to not notice he's ageing much slower than he should. Not unless they gave him regular memory wipes or something, which, why bother?
B) Whatever brought Coulson back, made him lose his muscle memory. There's no particular reason super-serum regen should do that.
As an aside: Right at the moment where Hall was falling into the Unobtainium my thought was "If this was a comic book, he'd survive and get superpowers from that. Wait, Marvel. He's definitely going to survive and get superpowers from that"
Like I've been saying, he's a super advanced LMD who'll become the Vision during Avengers 2.
Ironbite-the question is....Why did Fury have a Vision body just laying around?
...a Chitauri disease that they cured with Chitauri antibodies. (It was kind of like War of the Worlds in reverse. Kinda cool.) In the same episode, Coulson got his blood tested to see if there was anything weird going on with him. Interesting that the plot and subplot both involve looking for something in blood. Coincidence?
Coulson's blood work came back clean, but I'm betting that's only because they didn't think to test for those Chitauri antibodies.
"Did I fall asleep?"
"For a little while."
Clear brainwashing/implanted memory hint. Not really any new information, but a cool easter egg.
So I guess Coulson isn't a Chitauri, or a robot. But they still didn't fully explain HOW they were able to bring him back.
I loved how May used "exact words" to get Skye off the plane so she could find Coulsin better. I also loved when skye floored Raina with a single punch. The b*tch SO deserved it! Interesting info about what happened to coulsin. We didn't get details, but we got enough to find out they did some rather questionable things to bring him back. I wonder if any pacts with other beings were made or if it was all just a bunch of scientific maneuvers.