Author Topic: The crazy stuff people say on the net  (Read 13815 times)

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Online Askold

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The crazy stuff people say on the net
« on: February 01, 2016, 01:55:28 am »
For those times when it's not so much bad what they say, just insane or stupid...

I originally found this when the same guy made a rebuttal to a review of Atlas shrugged. (which in itself is a rather impressive whargargarble mainly explaining that Europeans can't understand the genious of Ayn Rand because of soccer, communism and the fact that they do something other than work for fun.)

https://overmanwarrior.wordpress.com/2014/03/19/the-world-cannot-play-american-football-why-rugby-soccer-and-speed-skating-are-inferior/

"Overman warrior" someone thinks of themselves highly.

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By the time I got to high school I was so disenfranchised with the education system that I didn’t want to engage in any battle that the school would benefit from.  I hated the coaches and most of the members of the team, so I stayed away even though it was a game I was naturally inclined to.  Once I got away from my school days I found I enjoyed the game increasingly over the years and found it to be unique to America in many ways that are positive.  In football the receiver can get behind the defensive backs if they are faster.  The only off-sides there is goes against the defense.  They cannot jump across the line until the offense led by the quarterback starts their play.  This is the essence of the difference between soccer and football.  In soccer off-sides favors the defense, in American football it favors the offense. In America the offense metaphorically speaking is of capitalism, industry, banking, invention, the defense is regulation, government, and political resistance.  The intention is to beat those elements to score a goal.  That is why Americans don’t typically cheer in football until yards are gained or a score is obtained.  In soccer they cheer collectively during the entire match.  In football it is typically when an achievement is obtained—this is a big difference.

Is there anyone else in the world who thinks that American hand-egg game is a metaphor for companies fighting against government regulation?
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Even Then

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Re: The crazy stuff people say on the net
« Reply #1 on: February 01, 2016, 05:16:29 am »
In hindsight, I regret naming the thread the way I did. I thought the original was too vague, but now I see that was pointless of me.

Also, ice hockey is totally a metaphor for heterophobia. See, the sticks represent penises and the goals represent vaginas, and the goalie is an oppressor of straights and

Online Askold

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Re: The crazy stuff people say on the net
« Reply #2 on: February 01, 2016, 06:31:32 am »
What about Ringette? Females pegging men is a bit too obvious for a game where women with sticks fight over a circle that they all want to poke.
No matter what happens, no matter what my last words may end up being, I want everyone to claim that they were:
"If you strike me down, I shall become more powerful than you could possibly imagine."
Aww, you guys rock. :)  I feel the love... and the pitchforks and torches.  Tingly!

Offline SCarpelan

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Re: The crazy stuff people say on the net
« Reply #3 on: February 01, 2016, 06:41:01 am »
How about football/soccer? The whole game is about kicking and otherwise abusing a ball. Not all that subtle a reference to subjugating and feminizing men.

Online Askold

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Re: The crazy stuff people say on the net
« Reply #4 on: February 01, 2016, 06:46:11 am »
Of course soccer is feminazification:

It's all about making men less aggressive and more feminine. They pretend to get injured for attention and in the hopes that the judges take pity on them. The corruption and bribery in FIFA is probably a metaphor for women taking all the hard earned money men make with their alimony and child support.
No matter what happens, no matter what my last words may end up being, I want everyone to claim that they were:
"If you strike me down, I shall become more powerful than you could possibly imagine."
Aww, you guys rock. :)  I feel the love... and the pitchforks and torches.  Tingly!

Even Then

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Re: The crazy stuff people say on the net
« Reply #5 on: February 01, 2016, 07:42:16 am »
and the puck is sperm

Offline mellenORL

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Re: The crazy stuff people say on the net
« Reply #6 on: February 01, 2016, 09:23:26 am »
Of course soccer is feminazification:

It's all about making men less aggressive and more feminine. They pretend to get injured for attention and in the hopes that the judges take pity on them. The corruption and bribery in FIFA is probably a metaphor for women taking all the hard earned money men make with their alimony and child support.

Bolded where coffee nearly soaked my screen. XD
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Offline Cletus

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Re: The crazy stuff people say on the net
« Reply #7 on: February 02, 2016, 08:33:06 pm »
This whole video.
#Invalid YouTube Link#
A morbidly obese man giving a garbled history lesson wearing a gasmask and a fedora. It ends with him ranting about how he hates the Nazis...for killing off Jews instead of blacks and Muslims.

Offline Ultimate Paragon

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Re: The crazy stuff people say on the net
« Reply #8 on: February 02, 2016, 08:52:22 pm »
This whole video.
<a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vtlrMatMhnY" target="_blank">http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vtlrMatMhnY</a>
A morbidly obese man giving a garbled history lesson wearing a gasmask and a fedora. It ends with him ranting about how he hates the Nazis...for killing off Jews instead of blacks and Muslims.

Just for the record, you need to remove the "s" from the "https".

Offline mellenORL

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Re: The crazy stuff people say on the net
« Reply #9 on: February 02, 2016, 11:00:57 pm »
He seems drunk or high as hell. And slowly dying from strain on his heart. Sad, damaged guy.
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Offline Ironchew

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Re: The crazy stuff people say on the net
« Reply #10 on: February 02, 2016, 11:03:20 pm »
And slowly dying from strain on his heart.

Aren't we all slowly dying?
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Offline ironbite

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Re: The crazy stuff people say on the net
« Reply #11 on: February 03, 2016, 10:12:59 am »
He's slowly dying faster.

Offline TheL

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Re: The crazy stuff people say on the net
« Reply #12 on: February 04, 2016, 03:32:58 pm »
He's slowly dying faster.

I have no idea why this is so damn funny.
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Offline Ultimate Paragon

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Re: The crazy stuff people say on the net
« Reply #13 on: February 04, 2016, 06:04:02 pm »
Here's something from r/conspiracy:

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I don’t believe the 18th century actually happened.

I have come to realize that in the late 1600’s, the merchant princes and bankers were part of a secret society of ultra-wealthy conspirators who deeply resented their subservience to royalty and other institutions of the state, and they put together a daring plan to take over the world. It was the last time in history, before the explosion of science and communication technology, that there would be such a perfect confluence of printed media tightly controlled by big companies, widespread illiteracy, concentrated centers of education, draconian debtor laws, and extremely common premature death that they could wipe the slate clean on history, and educate a new generation of unquestioning children with the doctrine that it was suddenly the 1800’s.

I have come to the terrifying conclusion that all of the history from the years 1700 – 1800 was cobbled together by a secret society of highly ambitious, maniacal rich people. They controlled enough royal debt, all the printing presses, bought off an already hilariously corrupt church (installing a new Pope in the process, loyal to the bankers), ran the entire world through a brutal system of colonies, and ruled over a highly illiterate population which received any information from the big printing presses this secret society ultimately controlled.

Their objective was to create a nation ruled by businessmen. Through propaganda, threats, bribes, murder, and the tightly controlled printing of books, they convinced people in the year 1700 that it was actually the year 1800, that thirteen colonies of the British Empire, controlled primarily by wealthy bankers and landowners, had somehow won a war against the most terrifying military power on the globe and established a country where there were no kings, no popes, no caliphates, and no historical culture except the one they invented in the so-called history books they printed and delivered to schoolhouses across the globe.

I can’t put it any other way, my friends, but I’m willing to stand up and be the lone voice in a world controlled by the stifling influence of this relentless conspiracy. The 18th century did not happen! It was all a hoax. The men in charge of this conspiracy knew that they stood upon the precipice of a disaster. They knew that in only a few short years, there would be cameras and newspapers and telegraphs and phones and smaller, more affordable printing presses. They knew that questioning history would become impossible in only a few short decades. They knew that as lifespans increased, it would be more and more difficult to explain away the death of a 35 year old lawyer who refused to go along with their schemes. They knew the colonial system was on the verge of collapse, so they would be unable to force the native populations of the globe to modify their calendars. The enslavement of Africans couldn’t last much longer, so it was their last chance to dictate unto the helpless and the uneducated what year it really was!

So they burned a few barns, fired some muskets into a few neighborhoods, played a theater of war between a handful of a farmers and a few squadrons of Royal British marines who were all soon to be bribed off to paradises in the Indian colonies, and they rewrote history. The divine right of kings was supplanted by the divine right of money, and now the colossus stands astride our globe! The glass towers of the secret kings of the Earth glitter in the sun, the shining, polluting, all-consuming legacy of wealth created by the most brilliant scam in history.

I will be writing more about this in the future. I am passionate about history, and passionate about the truth. I know that by posting this, my life will be in danger. I know that I may disappear at any moment because of these bold words, and when I do, you will know why! They won’t be able to tolerate my dissenting voice for long, but before they get me, I must cry out in the wilderness; I must cry out that we have been fooled and robbed of one hundred years of history by the maniacal money men of the past. These snakes, these merchant princes, bankers, and ultra-elite hucksters of modern history… they have corrupted history itself by completely splicing their existence into a timeline which is now poisoned.

This is like the "phantom time" hypothesis, except even dumber.

Offline davedan

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Re: The crazy stuff people say on the net
« Reply #14 on: February 04, 2016, 06:22:09 pm »
The fact that this is quite easy to read, has paragraphs, is spelled correctly and with good grammar, leads me to believe this is simply some kids English project. It is not serious, unless in a Foucault's Pendulum kind of way.

The fact you don't immediately recognise this makes me think you're being obtuse.