I lost my job, which is bad, but the how and why of it is what pisses me off. It went something like this: I was working cashier, which is not a bad gig if you can ignore the assholes, when the cig-snatching, cissexist, dirty old man of a manager calls me into his office. I signal for somebody to cover me and follow him, then he closes the door and asks me why I'm here. I respectfully answer that i'd hoped he would tell me, at which point he said I was accused of gross misconduct in the form of internal theft, for the amount of $175. That was the point where it dawned on me: he wanted me out, and this wasn't a power struggle I had any hope of winning. So, I retreated into my favorite defense mechanism, which happens to be Jeff "Joker" Moreau-level snark. My response to his accusation was a dry "Is that so? Huh, I guess that means that I can put gas in my gas tank and food in my pets' dishes. Thank you for informing me of my newfound illicit windfall, but I've got just one teensy question: if I stole $175, where is it?" He floundered and sputtered, clearly expecting me to cry and beg for my job or even utter the immortal phrase "please, I'll do anything", but I was having none of his listen-here-missy bullshit. He called in my team lead, who basically said "I know he's lying but he calls the shots around here, sorry, here's your last paycheck, have a nice life." So because I had the audacity to ask for my legally-obtained cigarettes back and because I didn't offer to let him facefuck me in exchange for dropping the bullshit charges, I'm out on my ass with a few hundred dollars in cash and a unearned criminal record. FUCK