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Community => Entertainment and Television => Topic started by: davedan on March 09, 2015, 08:33:18 pm

Title: Cricket World Cup
Post by: davedan on March 09, 2015, 08:33:18 pm
Now most of you US (and probably the Canadians too) Crackers may be unaware of it but right at this moment the Cricket World Cup is being played in Australia and New Zealand.

So far apart from New Zealand giving Australia the sort of touch up reserved between creepy uncles and nieces it has been a fantastic tournement.

But then it just got better. So much better. England and Wales are out. They lost to, guess who? Bangladesh http://www.theguardian.com/sport/blog/2015/mar/09/england-cricket-peter-moores-world-cup-bangladesh-mike-selvey#comments (http://www.theguardian.com/sport/blog/2015/mar/09/england-cricket-peter-moores-world-cup-bangladesh-mike-selvey#comments) It literally couldnt get any better.

No sorry that's wrong they could lose their last game to Afghanistan (who actually have been playing really well). Fuck I didn't think my schadenfreude could be any greater than when they got Mitch slapped at the last ashes 5 nil.

The hilarious thing is that Eoin Morgan, who is the captain of the English team is Irish and it looks like the irish will go through.

Oh crackers some times life is good.....
Title: Re: Cricket World Cup
Post by: dpareja on March 09, 2015, 08:45:12 pm
Cricket?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CUyK_J_W4BI (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CUyK_J_W4BI)
Title: Re: Cricket World Cup
Post by: Ultimate Paragon on March 09, 2015, 08:50:29 pm
Oh, I daresay, this simply isn't cricket, old chap.  *Polishes monocle*
Title: Re: Cricket World Cup
Post by: ironbite on March 09, 2015, 09:03:09 pm
Listen UP I am so tired of you making threads that will just go nowhere on shit that nobody gives a fly..ing....fuck...Davedan?  Not you too!

Ironbite-for fucks sake man, have some compassion!
Title: Re: Cricket World Cup
Post by: Second Coming of Madman on March 09, 2015, 09:06:38 pm
Listen UP I am so tired of you making threads that will just go nowhere on shit that nobody gives a fly..ing....fuck...Davedan?  Not you too!

Ironbite-for fucks sake man, have some compassion!

Well, let's get out the blowtorch and start testing everyone's blood.
Title: Re: Cricket World Cup
Post by: davedan on March 09, 2015, 09:16:41 pm
Look you fucking crackers - don't rag cricket or I will swim over there and kill you all with my dick. If the internal haemorraging doesn't get you the syphilis will.

Now for those who want to see what cricket is really about (hurling a piece of leather that can literally kill someone at over 150kms/hr at an English man's head) - heres the highlights from the last ashes:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=djbGMFQXfwU
Title: Re: Cricket World Cup
Post by: dpareja on March 09, 2015, 09:58:57 pm
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Bh3JyrSznd0
Title: Re: Cricket World Cup
Post by: davedan on March 10, 2015, 01:12:59 am
Don't make me get my speedos on Dpareja (if that is your real name) I'll fucking swim to Canada too if I have to cracker.
Title: Re: Cricket World Cup
Post by: dpareja on March 10, 2015, 01:16:34 am
Don't make me get my speedos on Dpareja (if that is your real name) I'll fucking swim to Canada too if I have to cracker.

I'm just salty about Canada losing ODI status (even though it's because our team sucks now).
Title: Re: Cricket World Cup
Post by: davedan on March 10, 2015, 01:31:45 am
That South Australian guy who played for you retire? Its a shame that the ICC have stuck their dicks in their ears and are going to cull the World Cup to 10 teams when they should be expanding to 16 in 4 pools of 4. Although with only 10 teams England probably won't make it...
Title: Re: Cricket World Cup
Post by: dpareja on March 10, 2015, 01:37:55 am
That South Australian guy who played for you retire? Its a shame that the ICC have stuck their dicks in their ears and are going to cull the World Cup to 10 teams when they should be expanding to 16 in 4 pools of 4. Although with only 10 teams England probably won't make it...

His retirement was pretty much the beginning of the end for Canadian cricket actually being good. (And to think that the ICC almost gave Canada Test status back in the 1950s.)

Anyway, even if it were 16 teams Canada would be nowhere close now.

Fun side note: the first international cricket match was played in New York City, between the US and Canada (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Canadian_cricket_team_in_the_United_States_in_1844). (Unless you ask Cricket Canada, who will tell you that the first such match was an earlier one played in Montreal.) If it hadn't been for the US Civil War, and that a three-hour game is rather more attractive to some than a three-day one in a setting where you could be attacked at any time, international cricket might look rather different now.
Title: Re: Cricket World Cup
Post by: davedan on March 23, 2015, 05:31:11 pm
Update: We are now at the pointy end of the tournemant. The hopefuls, the feelgood stories (Bangladesh, Ireland and Afghanistan) are gone. With them the underperformers (England), the mercurial (Pakistan) and the sucked out shell of cricket's former super power (West Indies). We are now left with the 4 teams that prior to the start of the tournemant everyone thought would win. It is possible at this stage for it to be an all host nation final with Aus vs NZ but before that happens Australia has to beat the might of India and NZ will have to beat both the clinical brilliance of AB de Villiers and the rest of his South African team.

NZ vs SA is on today should be a cracking game.
Title: Re: Cricket World Cup
Post by: dpareja on March 23, 2015, 05:57:08 pm
(http://sd.keepcalm-o-matic.co.uk/i/not-this-shit-again.png)
Title: Re: Cricket World Cup
Post by: davedan on March 24, 2015, 12:42:04 am
This shit hasn't finished. And fuck it crackers I don't interrupt your video game threads when your talking about destiny quest cockmonkey hero or whatever the fuck.

I'm going to fucking update this thread constanty now. Fucking crackers.

South Africa is 3/216 after 38 overs and it is currently raining in Auckland. NZ look like they might have a bone in their throat because they're choking - dropped catches and missed run outs...
Title: Re: Cricket World Cup
Post by: Ultimate Paragon on March 24, 2015, 12:49:49 am
This shit hasn't finished. And fuck it crackers I don't interrupt your video game threads when your talking about destiny quest cockmonkey hero or whatever the fuck.

I'm going to fucking update this thread constanty now. Fucking crackers.

South Africa is 3/216 after 38 overs and it is currently raining in Auckland. NZ look like they might have a bone in their throat because they're choking - dropped catches and missed run outs...

Maybe they'd be less upset if you did a Howard Cosell impression.
Title: Re: Cricket World Cup
Post by: dpareja on March 24, 2015, 01:36:29 am
This shit hasn't finished. And fuck it crackers I don't interrupt your video game threads when your talking about destiny quest cockmonkey hero or whatever the fuck.

Said threads are about things that interest more than one regular poster on this forum.
Title: Re: Cricket World Cup
Post by: Ironchew on March 24, 2015, 01:52:15 am
This shit hasn't finished. And fuck it crackers I don't interrupt your video game threads when your talking about destiny quest cockmonkey hero or whatever the fuck.

Said threads are about things that interest more than one regular poster on this forum.

Maybe some of us religiously lurk on cricket threads? Davedan wouldn't necessarily know.

I've started my fair share of obscure threads so I can't really take a dig at him for talking about something he likes.
Title: Re: Cricket World Cup
Post by: Art Vandelay on March 24, 2015, 02:03:19 am
This shit hasn't finished. And fuck it crackers I don't interrupt your video game threads when your talking about destiny quest cockmonkey hero or whatever the fuck.

Said threads are about things that interest more than one regular poster on this forum.

If you aren't interested in the thread, don't read it. It's not as though it's not clearly labeled or anything.
This shit hasn't finished. And fuck it crackers I don't interrupt your video game threads when your talking about destiny quest cockmonkey hero or whatever the fuck.
What about my talking about destiny quest cockmonkey hero?
Title: Re: Cricket World Cup
Post by: davedan on March 24, 2015, 02:16:16 am
And now play has resumed and SA are 5/277 after 42.4 overs.

UP - I have no idea who Howard Cosell is but you can Cosell my balls. I do however do a good Max Walker.

Ironchew - Thanks

Dpareja - Push me and I'm going to start mentioning cricket in every post no matter which thread.

Art - to be honest I thought they modelled destiny quest cockmonkey hero after you ... so you can talk about it as much as you like.
Title: Re: Cricket World Cup
Post by: Random Gal on March 24, 2015, 02:21:53 am
Now I want to see somebody actually create a game called Destiny Quest Cockmonkey Hero.
Title: Re: Cricket World Cup
Post by: davedan on March 24, 2015, 02:45:53 am
South Africa finished at 5/281 after 43 overs but because of the Duckworth Lewis system NZ must score 298 in their 43 overs in a rain abridged game.

Brendon Mcullum is in fierce form and is 35 off 19 balls with NZ 0/46 after 4 overs....
Title: Re: Cricket World Cup
Post by: Askold on March 24, 2015, 03:29:39 am
Ahh Cricket, the sport of the kings.

More popular than the 'Murrican Hand Egg game and as far as I am aware people aren't loudly protesting that rapists should be freed from charges simply because they are good at playing cricket.

I'm pretty sure that it is less commercialized than Hand Egg as well.
Title: Re: Cricket World Cup
Post by: davedan on March 24, 2015, 05:55:12 pm
Turned into an Epic result for a NZ win. Needing 5 runs off the last two balls - Elliott hit a six to bring NZ into the world cup final for the first time.

http://www.news.com.au/sport/cricket/cricket-world-cup-grant-elliott-consoles-dale-steyn-at-end-of-epic-semi-final/story-fnqpo3wn-1227277151503 (http://www.news.com.au/sport/cricket/cricket-world-cup-grant-elliott-consoles-dale-steyn-at-end-of-epic-semi-final/story-fnqpo3wn-1227277151503)
Title: Re: Cricket World Cup
Post by: davedan on March 31, 2015, 08:46:56 pm
Now that I am sober enough to type, here's the wrap up.

Australia beat India in the other semi-final. This made the final Aus vs NZ to be played at the MCG.

NZ batted first and were rolled comprehensively for 183 all out. Australia won with 14 overs to go by 7 wickets.

There was, and continues to be, much rejoicing.

Thanks for coming