It was suggested I share these because they were mildly amusing. Names and faces are blanked out because I might upload them to Memebase for a laugh.
BACKGROUND: I joined OK Cupid a few years ago when I was still single looking mostly for new friends and possibly some casual dating. I kept the profile after the boything and I got together but I openly say I have a boyfriend and am looking for friends only (since I don't know many people here). I don't respond to booty-call-esque messages because I don't want to encourage them, but every now and then someone is just pathetic and desperate enough that I can't resist. I don't have the balls to stick around for reactions though, so after I fire off a message like these I block the recipient.
And yes, I'm aware the second one contains typos. Don't hit me with anything larger than your own hand, please.