Not Always Thread

[Ghoti]

These people exist?

Yes, they do. I once had to make a BEEF taco pizza WITH NO BEEF. Dude didn't want a vegetarian pizza because "vegetarian is jus' Indian for 'bad hunter'", he wanted a beef taco pizza with no beef. He got a vegetarian taco pizza and a $6 asshole surcharge.

Adding beef to a pizza costs $6?

No, but treating the staff like they exist to serve you does. If my manager's there, she might say "make sure they come back" which is code for "add the asshole surcharge". If she's not, we leave a note and she reviews the incident on the cameras. If she doesn't agree with our assessment of someone's douchebaggery, she refunds the customer out of our paychecks.

[Veras]

Wait... there is a literal asshole surcharge!?

That is so cool.  The best that I could ever do was give people decaf instead of regular espresso when I was a Barnes & Noble barista.  This is better.

[Ghoti]

Wait... there is a literal asshole surcharge!?

That is so cool.  The best that I could ever do was give people decaf instead of regular espresso when I was a Barnes & Noble barista.  This is better.

Yep, it's awesome. It directly encourages good customer service to jackasses (revenge is sweet!) while discouraging them to come and bother us again. The "if I disagree with you the refund come outa your paycheck" discourages abuse/overuse. Apparently my manger was a bartender for a while and the bar she worked at had a "jackass surcharge" of $20 or 25% of your tab (whichever seemed appropriate) if you were too annoying to go unpunished but not disruptive enough to get a bouncer.

[Veras]

How do you explain the additional charge to the customer?  Do you actually say something to the extent of, "That's $35.95 of the pizza, plus $6 for being a dick, which brings your total to $41.95."

[Ghoti]

How do you explain the additional charge to the customer?  Do you actually say something to the extent of, "That's $35.95 of the pizza, plus $6 for being a dick, which brings your total to $41.95."

By pressing the "delivery charge" button thrice, which displays a generic "surcharge" to the customer. The old guard can remember a couple instances where the customer questioned it, but the cashier just played dumb.

[Ghoti]

Double post YEEEAH

http://notalwayslearning.com/not-quite-a-klandestine-answer/34373

I didn't quite laugh, but I made a weird "snerrk" sound that made the cat jump.

http://notalwayslearning.com/carpe-dallas/34317

Who the hell still teaches Latin?

[Zygarde]

It's usually offered as an elective course sorta like a lot of other languages but not as important. (As a side note if I were to start my own country I would make the official language Latin just to fuck with people.)

[Cerim Treascair]

Okay, the Latin class is damned funny, I'll say that.

[dpareja]

So going back through archives (on account of wanting a laugh and having nothing better to do), I found this one:

http://notalwayslearning.com/judge-not-lest-ye-get-jumped/31491

EDIT: And I found another one: how many trigger warnings would this need to be posted on Tumblr?

http://notalwayslearning.com/revenge-is-sweat/31281

[Veras]

I took two years of Spanish in high school and one year of Latin in college.  That year of Latin is the only reason that I understand any Spanish at all, and it improved my English a lot as well.

Oh, but I didn't really learn any Latin.

[Random Gal]

Not sure if this one's been posted here before, but this is classic creationist idiocy.

[Witchyjoshy]

One of the few times I cheer for the Mormons.

[Random Gal]

One of those paranoid fundies who sees demons everywhere walks into an anime convention. Hilarity ensues.

[I am lizard]

One of those paranoid fundies who sees demons everywhere walks into an anime convention. Hilarity ensues.

So she's claiming Homestucks are satanists murders.

And the problem with that statement is?

[Cerim Treascair]

Speaking as a longtime furry fandom member... meh, I've seen worse.