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Community => Politics and Government => Topic started by: Nemo on September 01, 2015, 09:22:27 am

Title: A Glimpse of Ben Carson
Post by: Nemo on September 01, 2015, 09:22:27 am
NPR had a contest years back in which people would respond to a prompt, the prompt being "This I Believe". Needless to say, the essay topics were pretty diverse. A random assortment of essays, some by famous people, some by not so famous people, were compiled into a book. Dr. Ben Carson's essay was one of them.

Here is a link to Dr. Carson's essay. (http://thisibelieve.org/essay/38/)

Regarding what it says about his personal beliefs, it validates something I speculated a while back. Namely, Carson had a somewhat rough childhood (being raised by a single parent) and wanted to disassociate himself from the ghetto culture, which I can't say I disagree with at all. Also, Carson embraced religion for emotional reasons and adopted the other stuff (gay bashing) because he saw it as part of a package deal.
Title: Re: A Glimpse of Ben Carson
Post by: Barbarella on September 01, 2015, 11:25:07 am
NPR had a contest years back in which people would respond to a prompt, the prompt being "This I Believe". Needless to say, the essay topics were pretty diverse. A random assortment of essays, some by famous people, some by not so famous people, were compiled into a book. Dr. Ben Carson's essay was one of them.

Here is a link to Dr. Carson's essay. (http://thisibelieve.org/essay/38/)

Regarding what it says about his personal beliefs, it validates something I speculated a while back. Namely, Carson had a somewhat rough childhood (being raised by a single parent) and wanted to disassociate himself from the ghetto culture, which I can't say I disagree with at all. Also, Carson embraced religion for emotional reasons and adopted the other stuff (gay bashing) because he saw it as part of a package deal.


Shame he didn't run to a church like the ECUSA, PCUSA, ELCA, or UCC. He should know that you can still love that nice Nazarene without being a bigoted, creationist, Bible-literalist cretin.

Had he picked a sane, Christlike church, he would still be considered a noble figure and great role-model, today.

Believe me, he WAS a role-model, especially for the black Community....
http://www.thedailybeast.com/articles/2014/03/16/ben-carson-was-a-role-model-for-black-teens-until-he-sold-out-to-the-right.html
....Such a tragic story. Someone like him was someone for black kids to look up too, only to burn bridges and come out as "Dr. Ruckus".

[RUCKUS: The equivalent of an "Uncle Tom". Except the REAL Uncle Tom was actually a heroic, pro-black character in Harriet Beecher Stowe's abolitionist classic, Uncle Tom's Cabin. We need to retire "Uncle Tom" from the maws of minstrelsy and see him for the good man he was. "Uncle Remus" doesn't really fly with me, either because that Disney flick was considered "fair for it's day" even if it doesn't look well, now (Remus was a gentle bearer of homespun wisdom who helped people & the Br'er Rabbit stories were an African/Black American folk tradition. "UNCLE RUCKUS" is a FAR better term!]
Title: Re: A Glimpse of Ben Carson
Post by: Ultimate Paragon on September 01, 2015, 11:53:40 am
Or maybe Methodism or one of the more tolerant Baptist churches.
Title: Re: A Glimpse of Ben Carson
Post by: Barbarella on September 01, 2015, 12:19:54 pm
Or maybe Methodism or one of the more tolerant Baptist churches.

Dubya's a Methodist.

I'm not saying that mainstream denominations have their wingnuts. However, the denominations that I mentioned wouldn't appeal to the Teabag crowd.

There's Conservatives and then there's Wingnuts. The former are okay but the latter are crazy.
Title: Re: A Glimpse of Ben Carson
Post by: Ultimate Paragon on September 01, 2015, 12:29:04 pm
Or maybe Methodism or one of the more tolerant Baptist churches.

Dubya's a Methodist.

I'm not saying that mainstream denominations have their wingnuts. However, the denominations that I mentioned wouldn't appeal to the Teabag crowd.

There's Conservatives and then there's Wingnuts. The former are okay but the latter are crazy.

Just like with Liberals and Moonbats.  Or Moderates and "Gut Maybes".
Title: Re: A Glimpse of Ben Carson
Post by: Barbarella on September 01, 2015, 01:08:57 pm
Or maybe Methodism or one of the more tolerant Baptist churches.

Dubya's a Methodist.

I'm not saying that mainstream denominations have their wingnuts. However, the denominations that I mentioned wouldn't appeal to the Teabag crowd.

There's Conservatives and then there's Wingnuts. The former are okay but the latter are crazy.

Just like with Liberals and Moonbats.  Or Moderates and "Gut Maybes".

What's a "Gut-Maybe" does it mean Progressives think with their "gut" only part-time?

Moonbats weird me out, too. I'm super-hippie-dippie-lefty into flower-power but I my motto is "Radical change via moderate means". You need to appeal to more folks to change society. More people would listen to someone like Martin Luther King Jr. rather than someone like Stokely Charmichael. You can call me as "Sane-Lefty". Extreme Leftists, hardcore Communists, extreme Anarchists, etc., weird me out and they actually hurt Progressivism.

One needs to be Moderate & not alarmist in their ways & methods.
Title: Re: A Glimpse of Ben Carson
Post by: Ultimate Paragon on September 01, 2015, 01:21:06 pm
Or maybe Methodism or one of the more tolerant Baptist churches.

Dubya's a Methodist.

I'm not saying that mainstream denominations have their wingnuts. However, the denominations that I mentioned wouldn't appeal to the Teabag crowd.

There's Conservatives and then there's Wingnuts. The former are okay but the latter are crazy.

Just like with Liberals and Moonbats.  Or Moderates and "Gut Maybes".

What's a "Gut-Maybe" does it mean Progressives think with their "gut" only part-time?

Moonbats weird me out, too. I'm super-hippie-dippie-lefty into flower-power but I my motto is "Radical change via moderate means". You need to appeal to more folks to change society. More people would listen to someone like Martin Luther King Jr. rather than someone like Stokely Charmichael. You can call me as "Sane-Lefty". Extreme Leftists, hardcore Communists, extreme Anarchists, etc., weird me out and they actually hurt Progressivism.

One needs to be Moderate & not alarmist in their ways & methods.

It's a term I coined myself.  "Gut-Maybe" refers to the "bad" kinds of moderate.  Like those who think refusing to take a side makes them morally superior, or those in love with the middle ground fallacy.

I was inspired by the Neutral Planet from Futurama, whose president at one point claims "all I know is my gut says 'maybe'."
Title: Re: A Glimpse of Ben Carson
Post by: TheL on September 01, 2015, 04:21:31 pm
Or maybe Methodism or one of the more tolerant Baptist churches.

Dubya's a Methodist.

I'm not saying that mainstream denominations have their wingnuts. However, the denominations that I mentioned wouldn't appeal to the Teabag crowd.

There's Conservatives and then there's Wingnuts. The former are okay but the latter are crazy.

But is he Methodist or United Methodist?
Title: Re: A Glimpse of Ben Carson
Post by: VainRobot on September 08, 2015, 11:08:29 am
What's a "Gut-Maybe" does it mean Progressives think with their "gut" only part-time?

Moonbats weird me out, too. I'm super-hippie-dippie-lefty into flower-power but I my motto is "Radical change via moderate means". You need to appeal to more folks to change society. More people would listen to someone like Martin Luther King Jr. rather than someone like Stokely Charmichael. You can call me as "Sane-Lefty". Extreme Leftists, hardcore Communists, extreme Anarchists, etc., weird me out and they actually hurt Progressivism.

One needs to be Moderate & not alarmist in their ways & methods.

Martin Luther King Jr. wasn't the moderate that history has whitewashed him to be. In fact he was a socialist who saw white moderates as one of the greatest opponents to the civil rights struggle:

Quote
I must confess that over the past few years I have been gravely disappointed with the white moderate. I have almost reached the regrettable conclusion that the Negro’s great stumbling block in his stride toward freedom is not the White Citizen’s Counciler or the Ku Klux Klanner, but the white moderate, who is more devoted to “order” than to justice; who prefers a negative peace which is the absence of tension to a positive peace which is the presence of justice; who constantly says: “I agree with you in the goal you seek, but I cannot agree with your methods of direct action”; who paternalistically believes he can set the timetable for another man’s freedom; who lives by a mythical concept of time and who constantly advises the Negro to wait for a “more convenient season.”
Title: Re: A Glimpse of Ben Carson
Post by: Ultimate Paragon on September 08, 2015, 11:47:53 am
What's a "Gut-Maybe" does it mean Progressives think with their "gut" only part-time?

Moonbats weird me out, too. I'm super-hippie-dippie-lefty into flower-power but I my motto is "Radical change via moderate means". You need to appeal to more folks to change society. More people would listen to someone like Martin Luther King Jr. rather than someone like Stokely Charmichael. You can call me as "Sane-Lefty". Extreme Leftists, hardcore Communists, extreme Anarchists, etc., weird me out and they actually hurt Progressivism.

One needs to be Moderate & not alarmist in their ways & methods.

Martin Luther King Jr. wasn't the moderate that history has whitewashed him to be. In fact he was a socialist who saw white moderates as one of the greatest opponents to the civil rights struggle:

Quote
I must confess that over the past few years I have been gravely disappointed with the white moderate. I have almost reached the regrettable conclusion that the Negro’s great stumbling block in his stride toward freedom is not the White Citizen’s Counciler or the Ku Klux Klanner, but the white moderate, who is more devoted to “order” than to justice; who prefers a negative peace which is the absence of tension to a positive peace which is the presence of justice; who constantly says: “I agree with you in the goal you seek, but I cannot agree with your methods of direct action”; who paternalistically believes he can set the timetable for another man’s freedom; who lives by a mythical concept of time and who constantly advises the Negro to wait for a “more convenient season.”

And he was right.  The "middle road" isn't always the best one to take.  Sometimes, compromise is nothing more than allowing those in the wrong to have a say.

But I disagree with him on definitions.  In my opinion, a moderate is somebody in favor of equal rights.  Then again, I live in a time with different values, so maybe I'm falling into presentism.
Title: Re: A Glimpse of Ben Carson
Post by: Barbarella on September 08, 2015, 11:21:09 pm
What's a "Gut-Maybe" does it mean Progressives think with their "gut" only part-time?

Moonbats weird me out, too. I'm super-hippie-dippie-lefty into flower-power but I my motto is "Radical change via moderate means". You need to appeal to more folks to change society. More people would listen to someone like Martin Luther King Jr. rather than someone like Stokely Charmichael. You can call me as "Sane-Lefty". Extreme Leftists, hardcore Communists, extreme Anarchists, etc., weird me out and they actually hurt Progressivism.

One needs to be Moderate & not alarmist in their ways & methods.

Martin Luther King Jr. wasn't the moderate that history has whitewashed him to be. In fact he was a socialist who saw white moderates as one of the greatest opponents to the civil rights struggle:

Quote
I must confess that over the past few years I have been gravely disappointed with the white moderate. I have almost reached the regrettable conclusion that the Negro’s great stumbling block in his stride toward freedom is not the White Citizen’s Counciler or the Ku Klux Klanner, but the white moderate, who is more devoted to “order” than to justice; who prefers a negative peace which is the absence of tension to a positive peace which is the presence of justice; who constantly says: “I agree with you in the goal you seek, but I cannot agree with your methods of direct action”; who paternalistically believes he can set the timetable for another man’s freedom; who lives by a mythical concept of time and who constantly advises the Negro to wait for a “more convenient season.”

And he was right.  The "middle road" isn't always the best one to take.  Sometimes, compromise is nothing more than allowing those in the wrong to have a say.

But I disagree with him on definitions.  In my opinion, a moderate is somebody in favor of equal rights.  Then again, I live in a time with different values, so maybe I'm falling into presentism.

Also, Socialism isn't the yucky "Red-Stalinist" mess people assume it is. Socialism in varying degrees is a good thing.

And like I was saying before, you can be a radical while still appearing respectable and/or moderate in your methods. Radical change works best when you appeal to more people.
Title: Re: A Glimpse of Ben Carson
Post by: Lt. Fred on September 09, 2015, 02:43:22 am
What's a "Gut-Maybe" does it mean Progressives think with their "gut" only part-time?

Moonbats weird me out, too. I'm super-hippie-dippie-lefty into flower-power but I my motto is "Radical change via moderate means". You need to appeal to more folks to change society. More people would listen to someone like Martin Luther King Jr. rather than someone like Stokely Charmichael. You can call me as "Sane-Lefty". Extreme Leftists, hardcore Communists, extreme Anarchists, etc., weird me out and they actually hurt Progressivism.

One needs to be Moderate & not alarmist in their ways & methods.

Martin Luther King Jr. wasn't the moderate that history has whitewashed him to be. In fact he was a socialist who saw white moderates as one of the greatest opponents to the civil rights struggle:

Quote
I must confess that over the past few years I have been gravely disappointed with the white moderate. I have almost reached the regrettable conclusion that the Negro’s great stumbling block in his stride toward freedom is not the White Citizen’s Counciler or the Ku Klux Klanner, but the white moderate, who is more devoted to “order” than to justice; who prefers a negative peace which is the absence of tension to a positive peace which is the presence of justice; who constantly says: “I agree with you in the goal you seek, but I cannot agree with your methods of direct action”; who paternalistically believes he can set the timetable for another man’s freedom; who lives by a mythical concept of time and who constantly advises the Negro to wait for a “more convenient season.”

And he was right.  The "middle road" isn't always the best one to take.  Sometimes, compromise is nothing more than allowing those in the wrong to have a say.

But I disagree with him on definitions.  In my opinion, a moderate is somebody in favor of equal rights.  Then again, I live in a time with different values, so maybe I'm falling into presentism.

That was the terminology of the time. You got the "hard liners" - people who believe black people are human, and people who want to mass murder them if they could get away with it - and then you got the "moderates" who stand to be convinced either way. But don't push them! They'll get to it in their own good time!

This sort of moderate.

#Invalid YouTube Link#
Title: Re: A Glimpse of Ben Carson
Post by: VainRobot on September 09, 2015, 08:08:40 pm

And like I was saying before, you can be a radical while still appearing respectable and/or moderate in your methods. Radical change works best when you appeal to more people.

Martin Luther King Jr's methods WERE radical. Pacifism is not mutually exclusive with radicalism. He practiced a method of protest called civil disobedience, which meant he actively encouraged people to break the law. Many moderates were upset by his methods because he encouraged black people to rise up in direct conflict against police, government, and other racist institutions.

From his Letter from a Birmingham Jail:

Quote
Nonviolent direct action seeks to create such a crisis and foster such a tension that a community which has constantly refused to negotiate is forced to confront the issue. It seeks so to dramatize the issue that it can no longer be ignored. My citing the creation of tension as part of the work of the nonviolent resister may sound rather shocking. But I must confess that I am not afraid of the word "tension." I have earnestly opposed violent tension, but there is a type of constructive, nonviolent tension which is necessary for growth.

Quote
The purpose of our direct action program is to create a situation so crisis packed that it will inevitably open the door to negotiation.

He actively sought to create social unrest and conflict because he believed it was the only way the oppressors could be confronted.

Martin Luther King Jr. did NOT run a civil rights campaign that appealed to white people, he ran a campaign that brought black anger directly to the door of his oppressors to make them uncomfortable and afraid. To call him a moderate is to completely whitewash history and the struggle that civil rights advocates had to go through. People often say that modern black protestors should be less angry and obey the order of things, but we know from history that civil rights aren't achieved by sitting around and asking politely.
Title: Re: A Glimpse of Ben Carson
Post by: VainRobot on September 09, 2015, 08:14:17 pm
Also of note is this letter, written by a group of white moderate clergymen decrying MLK's protests which the Letter from a Birmingham Jail was a response to:

http://teachingamericanhistory.org/library/document/letter-to-martin-luther-king/ (http://teachingamericanhistory.org/library/document/letter-to-martin-luther-king/)

Quote
We further strongly urge our own Negro community to withdraw support from these demonstrations, and to unite locally in working peacefully for a better Birmingham. When rights are consistently denied, a cause should be pressed in the courts and in negotiations among local leaders, and not in the streets. We appeal to both our white and Negro citizenry to observe the principles of law and order and common sense.
Title: Re: A Glimpse of Ben Carson
Post by: Barbarella on September 10, 2015, 11:13:16 am

And like I was saying before, you can be a radical while still appearing respectable and/or moderate in your methods. Radical change works best when you appeal to more people.

Martin Luther King Jr's methods WERE radical. Pacifism is not mutually exclusive with radicalism. He practiced a method of protest called civil disobedience, which meant he actively encouraged people to break the law. Many moderates were upset by his methods because he encouraged black people to rise up in direct conflict against police, government, and other racist institutions.

From his Letter from a Birmingham Jail:

Quote
Nonviolent direct action seeks to create such a crisis and foster such a tension that a community which has constantly refused to negotiate is forced to confront the issue. It seeks so to dramatize the issue that it can no longer be ignored. My citing the creation of tension as part of the work of the nonviolent resister may sound rather shocking. But I must confess that I am not afraid of the word "tension." I have earnestly opposed violent tension, but there is a type of constructive, nonviolent tension which is necessary for growth.

Quote
The purpose of our direct action program is to create a situation so crisis packed that it will inevitably open the door to negotiation.

He actively sought to create social unrest and conflict because he believed it was the only way the oppressors could be confronted.

Martin Luther King Jr. did NOT run a civil rights campaign that appealed to white people, he ran a campaign that brought black anger directly to the door of his oppressors to make them uncomfortable and afraid. To call him a moderate is to completely whitewash history and the struggle that civil rights advocates had to go through. People often say that modern black protestors should be less angry and obey the order of things, but we know from history that civil rights aren't achieved by sitting around and asking politely.


Okay, I got it. You have a good point. I was basically looking at him through the filter of time & values dissonance. Indeed, he was radical.

I'm basically seeing everything from a present-day perspective. Nowadays, non-violent protest marches and peaceful civil disobedience is seen as reasonable.

Perhaps the words I was really looking for were "violently militant" instead of "radical".

Words & labels are funny things. People have different perceptions and often the very fabric of reality seems subjective.

And now, I'll do my impression of that guy from Scanners...
Title: Re: A Glimpse of Ben Carson
Post by: Ultimate Paragon on September 18, 2015, 04:58:06 pm
My perspective is that it's okay to try and find some kind of middle ground in most circumstances, but moderation for its own sake is no virtue.

Title: Re: A Glimpse of Ben Carson
Post by: lord gibbon on September 18, 2015, 08:58:04 pm
I disagree with UP on some subjects, but here he is 100% accurate.
Title: Re: A Glimpse of Ben Carson
Post by: Sigmaleph on September 18, 2015, 09:53:33 pm
My perspective is that it's okay to try and find some kind of middle ground in most circumstances, but moderation for its own sake is no virtue.

Everything in moderation, including moderation?
Title: Re: A Glimpse of Ben Carson
Post by: guizonde on September 19, 2015, 06:56:52 am
My perspective is that it's okay to try and find some kind of middle ground in most circumstances, but moderation for its own sake is no virtue.

Everything in moderation, including moderation?

nah, you have to party so hard a goat winds up on your neighbor's roof. it's in the rules.
Title: Re: A Glimpse of Ben Carson
Post by: Skybison on October 07, 2015, 11:47:15 pm
So Ben Carson said that the victims of the recent school shooting should have just rushed the gunman, and that we should arm kindergarten teachers.

How can someone be a Brain Surgeon and be so goddamn stupid?
Title: Re: A Glimpse of Ben Carson
Post by: ironbite on October 08, 2015, 12:05:50 am
Well when you do a self-lobotomy...
Title: Re: A Glimpse of Ben Carson
Post by: Canadian Mojo on October 08, 2015, 08:48:46 am
So Ben Carson said that the victims of the recent school shooting should have just rushed the gunman, and that we should arm kindergarten teachers.

How can someone be a Brain Surgeon and be so goddamn stupid?
Because despite its complexities brain surgery is really a just simple straight-forward affair. You go in with plan, a support team composed of experts, all the tools you need, and a clear cut objective. Neat and orderly. There is very little thinking on your feet and crisis management.

It's about as far removed from the ugliness of the real world as you can get this side of academia. If he were a combat medic or an ER surgeon his stupidity would be surprising, but this isn't.
Title: Re: A Glimpse of Ben Carson
Post by: RavynousHunter on October 08, 2015, 09:25:09 am
I dunno, I think a Glock would help keep the little shits in line.
Title: Re: A Glimpse of Ben Carson
Post by: Ultimate Paragon on October 08, 2015, 09:42:01 am
Sometimes, smart people are able to convince themselves of complete bullshit.
Title: Re: A Glimpse of Ben Carson
Post by: Askold on October 08, 2015, 12:00:23 pm
Sometimes, smart people are able to convince themselves of complete bullshit.

The smarter you are the better you are at rationalizing your beliefs. Being introspective and actually able to objectively check if those beliefs and prejudices are correct is a completely separate skill and not everyone has it regardless of how smart they are otherwise.
Title: Re: A Glimpse of Ben Carson
Post by: nickiknack on October 08, 2015, 03:15:18 pm
So much for Ben Carson, the tough guy (http://www.vox.com/2015/10/8/9480797/ben-carson-gunman-popeyes). I swear they're just pathetic.
Title: Re: A Glimpse of Ben Carson
Post by: Barbarella on October 08, 2015, 11:31:50 pm
I still think he was attacked by a wookalar, one night.  :P

Those pesky wookalars....
Title: Re: A Glimpse of Ben Carson
Post by: mellenORL on October 09, 2015, 10:18:34 am
He always acts and looks like he's thoroughly baked. Totally chill, sleepy-eyed and giggling inappropriately. If I saw him in person, I'd hand him a bag of Doritos.
Title: Re: A Glimpse of Ben Carson
Post by: nickiknack on October 09, 2015, 10:23:09 am
I wonder if he'll get offended if you hand him a bag of those rainbow colored ones, cause the gay is bad according to him.
Title: Re: A Glimpse of Ben Carson
Post by: Even Then on October 09, 2015, 10:56:02 am
Do those actually taste any different?
Title: Re: A Glimpse of Ben Carson
Post by: Ultimate Paragon on October 09, 2015, 11:38:48 am
He always acts and looks like he's thoroughly baked. Totally chill, sleepy-eyed and giggling inappropriately. If I saw him in person, I'd hand him a bag of Doritos.

Wonder if he could get an endorsement from Snoop.   ;D
Title: Re: A Glimpse of Ben Carson
Post by: mellenORL on October 09, 2015, 03:16:15 pm
I wonder if he'll get offended if you hand him a bag of those rainbow colored ones, cause the gay is bad according to him.

Or I could piss him off by handing him a bag of Oreos...
Title: Re: A Glimpse of Ben Carson
Post by: rookie on October 10, 2015, 10:37:52 am
I wonder if he'll get offended if you hand him a bag of those rainbow colored ones, cause the gay is bad according to him.

If he does get offended, apologize and say you spent some time in jail.
Title: Re: A Glimpse of Ben Carson
Post by: mellenORL on October 10, 2015, 03:58:33 pm
Rookie wins. XD
Title: Re: A Glimpse of Ben Carson
Post by: rookie on October 10, 2015, 05:05:54 pm
Rookie wins. XD

I'd like to thank Carson for being so easy to lampoon. And Trump, for making Carson seem saner politically than he really is.
Title: Re: A Glimpse of Ben Carson
Post by: niam2023 on October 10, 2015, 06:21:10 pm
Carson has however shown himself to be a depraved coward, so perhaps he will sink and further exacerbate The Rise of the Trump.
Title: Re: A Glimpse of Ben Carson
Post by: Dr. Weird on October 10, 2015, 06:49:24 pm
How can someone be a Brain Surgeon and be so goddamn stupid?

Ben Carson Shattering Stereotype About Brain Surgeons Being Smart (http://www.newyorker.com/humor/borowitz-report/ben-carson-shattering-stereotype-about-brain-surgeons-being-smart)

Quote
Brain surgeons, long burdened with the onerous reputation of being among the smartest people in the world, are expressing relief that the Republican Presidential candidate Ben Carson is shattering that stereotype once and for all.

In interviews with brain surgeons across the country, the doctors revealed the enormous pressure they felt to live up to their profession’s inflated renown for intelligence before Carson entered the race.

“When people found out I was a brain surgeon they would always assume I was some kind of a genius,” said Harland Dorrinson, a neurosurgeon in Toledo, Ohio. “Now they are beginning to understand that you can know a lot about brain surgery and virtually nothing about anything else.”

>snip<

He said that he was cheered by Carson’s pronouncement over the weekend that Muslims should not be President. “Now you can cross politics off the list of things that people will expect me to be knowledgeable about,” he said. “I think I speak for a lot of brain surgeons when I say, ‘Thank you, Ben Carson.’ ”

Another great barely-satirical article by Andy Borowitz.
Title: Re: A Glimpse of Ben Carson
Post by: Sigmaleph on October 10, 2015, 08:52:05 pm
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=THNPmhBl-8I
Title: Re: A Glimpse of Ben Carson
Post by: Skybison on October 11, 2015, 01:14:35 am
More from Andy Borowitz

Ben Carson: Pompeii victims should have outrun lava (http://www.newyorker.com/humor/borowitz-report/ben-carson-pompeii-victims-should-have-outrun-lava?intcid=mod-most-popular)

Quote
Citizens of the Roman town of Pompeii who were victims of Mt. Vesuvius’s eruption in 79 A.D. could have survived if they had “just outrun the lava,” the neurosurgeon Ben Carson told Fox News on Wednesday.

“Most of the plaster casts we have of Pompeii victims show them basically just lying down and whatnot,” he said. “If I had been in Pompeii and I heard Mt. Vesuvius erupting, you can bet I would have made a run for it.”


He said another option open to residents of Pompeii would have been “to fight the volcano.”

“Archeologists estimate that the population of Pompeii was about eleven thousand,” he said. “You can’t tell me that if eleven thousand people put their minds to it they couldn’t beat one volcano.”

Carson said he would spend the next week on the campaign trail dispensing helpful tips about how people can defeat earthquakes, tsunamis, and giant asteroids.
Title: Re: A Glimpse of Ben Carson
Post by: Barbarella on October 11, 2015, 02:17:46 am
How can someone be a Brain Surgeon and be so goddamn stupid?

Ben Carson Shattering Stereotype About Brain Surgeons Being Smart (http://www.newyorker.com/humor/borowitz-report/ben-carson-shattering-stereotype-about-brain-surgeons-being-smart)

Quote
Brain surgeons, long burdened with the onerous reputation of being among the smartest people in the world, are expressing relief that the Republican Presidential candidate Ben Carson is shattering that stereotype once and for all.

In interviews with brain surgeons across the country, the doctors revealed the enormous pressure they felt to live up to their profession’s inflated renown for intelligence before Carson entered the race.

“When people found out I was a brain surgeon they would always assume I was some kind of a genius,” said Harland Dorrinson, a neurosurgeon in Toledo, Ohio. “Now they are beginning to understand that you can know a lot about brain surgery and virtually nothing about anything else.”

>snip<

He said that he was cheered by Carson’s pronouncement over the weekend that Muslims should not be President. “Now you can cross politics off the list of things that people will expect me to be knowledgeable about,” he said. “I think I speak for a lot of brain surgeons when I say, ‘Thank you, Ben Carson.’ ”

Another great barely-satirical article by Andy Borowitz.


More from Andy Borowitz

Ben Carson: Pompeii victims should have outrun lava (http://www.newyorker.com/humor/borowitz-report/ben-carson-pompeii-victims-should-have-outrun-lava?intcid=mod-most-popular)

Quote
Citizens of the Roman town of Pompeii who were victims of Mt. Vesuvius’s eruption in 79 A.D. could have survived if they had “just outrun the lava,” the neurosurgeon Ben Carson told Fox News on Wednesday.

“Most of the plaster casts we have of Pompeii victims show them basically just lying down and whatnot,” he said. “If I had been in Pompeii and I heard Mt. Vesuvius erupting, you can bet I would have made a run for it.”


He said another option open to residents of Pompeii would have been “to fight the volcano.”

“Archeologists estimate that the population of Pompeii was about eleven thousand,” he said. “You can’t tell me that if eleven thousand people put their minds to it they couldn’t beat one volcano.”

Carson said he would spend the next week on the campaign trail dispensing helpful tips about how people can defeat earthquakes, tsunamis, and giant asteroids.

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....THE AWESOME IS STRONG WITH YOU TWO.