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How Art Vandelay stole Christmas

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Jacob Harrison; my revenge on Art for messing with me with those videos.

(click to show/hide)On Kiwi Farms, Art admitted that he was fucking with me with those videos so as revenge, I wrote about his Easter in 2018 in the parallel universe. If I make pornhub videos, will you agree to post this story in Creative Outlets?

It was Saturday March 31, 2018 in the parallel universe, the day before Easter. Art Vandelay was in the mall and saw someone dressed as the Easter Bunny handing out Easter candy to children. He walked up to him.

“Me want Candy,” he said.

“I’m sorry but your too old. This candy is for children,” said the guy dressed as the Easter Bunny.

“That’s so unfair! The candy is mine!”

He then took the basket full of candy.

“Do you want me to call security?!” said the guy.

“I’ll show you! Hey kids. This Easter Bunny is a fake! He is a loser who is doing this for money because he was fired from his job” said Art. He then took off the head of the bunny costume revealing that he was Tolpuddle Martyr.

“Holy Shit! Your Tolpuddle Martyr from Fstdt Forums!” said Art.

“Yes!” said Tolpuddle Martyr angrily. He then attacked Art causing a big fight. Art was shoved to the ground. Tolpuddle Martyr then grabbed Art’s pants pulling them off to humiliate him. Art got up and was about to charge at him, but Tolpuddle Martyr punched him in the balls.

“Ow Ow Ow!” said Art. He turned around to escape on the escalator but then Tolpuddle Martyr whacked Art’s ass with his pants causing Art to fall and slide down the escalator on his ass causing his underpants to rip which gave him a painful abrasion on his ass.

Art went home crying.

“It is so unfair that kids get to get Easter candy but I don’t! I will get my revenge by taking Easter Candy from that families new house tonight. Since this Christmas revealed that Santa Claus is real, the Easter Bunny must be real too. I must ambush him and take the candy.”

So that night Art went to the House of a family he knew and peered through the window. Eventually he saw a giant bunny come down the chimney. The bunny then laid plastic eggs full of candy into a basket.

“It is kind of weird that a male bunny has periods” muttered Art. He then lit a torch he brought and threw a rock at the window causing it to smash.

“Give me your candy Bunny or I will throw this torch at you.

“You fucking psycho!” said the Easter Bunny. “Taste my menstruating power!” He then laid an egg at a fast speed right in the direction of Art Vandelay’s balls. It hit it.

“Ow my balls! Take this!” He then threw the torch into the house. It caused the basket of candy to catch on fire.

“No! I destroyed the candy that I was going to eat!” said Art.

The father who went downstairs to investigate the noise of the window breaking, immediately shouted “Fire! Get out of the house.” The family which included a wife and two daughters and the Easter Bunny escaped the House. Art tried running but the Easter Bunny hopped over to him and grabbed him. The father called the fire department as the Easter Bunny brought Art over to the family.

“This is the man who set fire to your house. I will take him to the magical world of Easterland Congress he will be charged for crimes against Easter.”

“Well at least the Easter candy that your kids were going to eat is destroyed in the fire.”

“Stupid man” said the older daughter who was 7. “We know that Easter is not about candy, it is about Jesus dying and coming back to life. We are still happy.”

The Easter Bunny then took Art through a portal to a magical world of Easterland, inhabited by giant bunnies. Art was brought to the Supreme Court of Easterland. He was sentenced to have his arms and legs cut off, cooked, and then covered in chocolate to be given to families on Earth (who were not told it was actual human meat).

He was put in the dungeon. Lana Reverse/Bethicia who wanted to free Art so that he would go to the event she was hosting, went to Easterland and talked to the bunny authorities about how she was planning for a punishment involving a possessed Kangaroo. So the bunnies agreed to free him and give him prosthetic arms and legs but Art had no idea about Lana bailing him out and her plan involving the Kangaroo until it was revealed in this story.”
Yes, he gave me this to post here. Feel free to respond as you are wont to do.

Art Vandelay:

Again, I must be operating with a different idea on revenge.

Read that Kiwifarms thread and Jacob apparently admitted that his fiancee Alice was just an "alter ego", so it's safe to assume his other "friends" that also got involved here were also just alter egos. That boy ain't right. If he doesn't already have another sock buried in our drawer to pull out I'm sure he'll be back sooner rather than later.

I'm shocked, I tell you. Shocked!

Although I maintain his revenge is far more damaging to the building blocks of good story telling and writing than it could ever be to Art. And i suppose that's a blessing in its own way.


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