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Author Topic: Wishes Will Be Corrupted  (Read 373871 times)

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Offline N. De Plume

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Re: Wishes Will Be Corrupted
« Reply #255 on: January 28, 2012, 04:30:03 pm »
Granted. The gas goes liquid, and you got squishy diarrhea instead.

I wish I knew what to wish for.
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Offline rosenewock21

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Re: Wishes Will Be Corrupted
« Reply #256 on: January 28, 2012, 05:13:29 pm »
Granted. you wish to become a human centipede.

I wish offline had a "Fuck No!" feature.
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Matthew 22:39 "And the second is like unto it, Thou shalt love thy neighbour as thyself." God's own "don't be a dick" rule.

Quote from: Mlle Antéchrist on January 29, 2012, 10:53:28 pm
Lithp and Vene really need to have some kind of confusing sexual encounter where Vene spends the entire session lovingly insulting Lithp's technique, then cums on his face, ruffles his hair, says, "You're all right, kid!", and then punches him in the nuts.

Offline jumpingjackflash

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Re: Wishes Will Be Corrupted
« Reply #257 on: January 28, 2012, 07:12:56 pm »
Granted, you're the first one to get a Fuck No!

I wish I had some chocolate right now.
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Quote from: Art Vandelay on May 19, 2012, 11:18:14 pm
Ok seriously, is nobody even going to try and avenge my man-burrito?

Offline Spong Habsburg

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Re: Wishes Will Be Corrupted
« Reply #258 on: January 28, 2012, 09:22:09 pm »
Quote from: jumpingjackflash on January 28, 2012, 07:12:56 pm
Granted, you're the first one to get a Fuck No!

I wish I had some chocolate right now.

Granted. But it's not that kind of "chocolate".

I wish I had a new face.
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"The expression of polite horror on her face as it fell past mine, plus the sound of air whistling out of the top of her head, made me feel really crap."

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Offline N. De Plume

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Re: Wishes Will Be Corrupted
« Reply #259 on: January 28, 2012, 11:18:39 pm »
Granted. It belongs to Nicholas Cage. Now you have to infiltrate a super-secret oil rig prison while he takes over your job and family.

I wish for fish.
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Offline Captain Jack Harkness

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Re: Wishes Will Be Corrupted
« Reply #260 on: January 29, 2012, 12:27:44 am »
Wish granted.  You know have a rotten fish corpse.

I wish I had more money.
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Offline Normandy

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Re: Wishes Will Be Corrupted
« Reply #261 on: January 29, 2012, 12:35:19 am »
Granted, you now have an additional $10,000 in cash, and also an additional $20,000 in debt.

I wish I could survive without ever needing to sleep.
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Offline Her3tiK

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Re: Wishes Will Be Corrupted
« Reply #262 on: January 29, 2012, 02:29:03 am »
Quote from: Normandy on January 29, 2012, 12:35:19 am
Granted, you now have an additional $10,000 in cash, and also an additional $20,000 in debt.

I wish I could survive without ever needing to sleep.
Granted. Your lack of sleep leads to forgetting which day is which and drives you insane.

I wish my roommates weren't insomniacs.
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Quote from: TheL on February 27, 2012, 03:10:27 pm
Her3tik, you have groupies.
Ego: +5

Quote from: Art Vandelay on June 23, 2013, 01:32:54 am
There are a number of ways, though my favourite is simply to take them by surprise. They're just walking down the street, minding their own business when suddenly, WHACK! Penis to the face.

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Re: Wishes Will Be Corrupted
« Reply #263 on: January 29, 2012, 03:55:10 am »
Granted, they're coprophiles instead.

I wish people would stop wishing for fish.
« Last Edit: August 29, 2017, 10:19:17 am by Art Vandelay »
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Offline Sleepy

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Re: Wishes Will Be Corrupted
« Reply #264 on: January 29, 2012, 03:59:35 am »
Granted, people always wish for that ass rash to spread to your dick and remain there forever.

I wish I could press a button to satisfy my hunger.
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Quote from: lord gibbon on January 11, 2016, 12:42:28 am
Guys, this is getting creepy. Can we talk about cannibalism instead?

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Offline The Right Honourable Mlle Antéchrist

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Re: Wishes Will Be Corrupted
« Reply #265 on: January 29, 2012, 04:26:43 am »
Granted, your belly is immediately stuffed full of Sauteed Art Vandelay Rash-Dicks.

I wish university education was free.
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Offline jumpingjackflash

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Re: Wishes Will Be Corrupted
« Reply #266 on: January 29, 2012, 06:42:07 am »
Granted. However, on your first class the professor immediately throws an exam in your face, consisting of the most complex quantum mechanics, algebra, and trigonometry questions you will ever face.

I wish I had a nice big cluebat to whack some sense into some fundies I know.
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Quote from: Art Vandelay on May 19, 2012, 11:18:14 pm
Ok seriously, is nobody even going to try and avenge my man-burrito?

Offline Her3tiK

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Re: Wishes Will Be Corrupted
« Reply #267 on: January 29, 2012, 11:36:13 am »
Quote from: jumpingjackflash on January 29, 2012, 06:42:07 am
Granted. However, on your first class the professor immediately throws an exam in your face, consisting of the most complex quantum mechanics, algebra, and trigonometry questions you will ever face.

I wish I had a nice big cluebat to whack some sense into some fundies I know.
Granted, but it's a cheap-ass model that doesn't work half the time, so you're arrested for assault.

I wish I had tickets to see Rise Against in April.
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Quote from: TheL on February 27, 2012, 03:10:27 pm
Her3tik, you have groupies.
Ego: +5

Quote from: Art Vandelay on June 23, 2013, 01:32:54 am
There are a number of ways, though my favourite is simply to take them by surprise. They're just walking down the street, minding their own business when suddenly, WHACK! Penis to the face.

Offline Captain Jack Harkness

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Re: Wishes Will Be Corrupted
« Reply #268 on: January 29, 2012, 11:54:47 am »
You have tickets now.  In April, you learn that they're not genuine, and are denied access to the concert.

I wish that my cum was the best tasting in the world and that like...they sold it as food for some unknown reason.  (I dunno!  I just felt like making a bizarre wish!)
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Re: Wishes Will Be Corrupted
« Reply #269 on: January 29, 2012, 12:01:54 pm »
Granted, guess what your mum's having for dinner?

I wish there were more hours in the night.
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