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Community => Entertainment and Television => Topic started by: Captain Jack Harkness on January 01, 2013, 11:37:11 pm

Title: Movies That Suck
Post by: Captain Jack Harkness on January 01, 2013, 11:37:11 pm
Okay, so my sister was watching Easy A earlier today, and I eventually had to distract myself with music because I REALLY fucking hate the movie.  So I was thinking I should make a topic for movies that you hate.  Bonus points if they're popular.  Surprisingly, apparently a lot of people really like Easy A, or at least according to Rotten Tomatoes.  I went there to see what people thought of it, expecting it to have a pretty terrible score, but it got an 85%.

http://www.rottentomatoes.com/m/easy-a/

I personally think the goddamn thing is obnoxious, filled with annoying characters.  I seriously fucking hate it.  I mean, you KNOW I fucking hate it when it actually inspires me to create a thread where people can talk about movies they think are absolute fucking shite.

Anyway, any movies you guys fucking hate?
Title: Re: Movies That Suck
Post by: nickiknack on January 01, 2013, 11:58:10 pm
Groundhog Day(1993)
I really hate that movie, and I really don't get what's so funny about it. The humor is lost on me. Not to mention it was one of my dad's favorite movies, and he would watch it all the fucking time. Shit, I don't even watch any of the Star Wars movies as much as he watched that movie within a year.
Title: Re: Movies That Suck
Post by: Art Vandelay on January 02, 2013, 12:14:38 am
I've said it before, but Avatar can fuck right off. Doubly so because it brought back 3D movies.
Title: Re: Movies That Suck
Post by: nickiknack on January 02, 2013, 12:18:04 am
I hope the whole new 3D fad fades quickly, I have such trouble watching them, because not only do they cost an arm and leg, but they give me a headache also.
Title: Re: Movies That Suck
Post by: rageaholic on January 02, 2013, 12:43:43 am
I've grown to despise pretentious indy arthouse films.  I find them extremely boring, but apparently that makes me some shallow dumbass who only wants to see shit blow up.  Um maybe it's because when I watch a movie, I want to be entertained, not fucking depressed.   
Title: Re: Movies That Suck
Post by: Sleepy on January 02, 2013, 12:45:54 am
I also have a burning hatred for Easy A. It was so full of shit to begin with. That is not how a fucking high school works, and the supposedly likeable protagonist just needed to be shot.

Also, I loathe romantic comedies.
Title: Re: Movies That Suck
Post by: RavynousHunter on January 02, 2013, 01:07:13 am
Quote from: Sleepy on January 02, 2013, 12:45:54 am
Also, I loathe romantic comedies.

Hey hey!  So do I.  The entire genre generally gets on my fuckin nerves.
Title: Re: Movies That Suck
Post by: Captain Jack Harkness on January 02, 2013, 01:18:00 am
Oh, I thought of another movie I fucking hate, although this one isn't quite as popular as Easy A - thank fucking goodness.

Due Date fucking sucks.

http://www.rottentomatoes.com/m/due-date/

Seriously, Zach Galifianakis - I copypasta'd that name, by the way.  It doesn't deserve the dignity of me remembering the letters to type it out - plays such an annoying fucking character.  Seriously, the character is so fucking bad that it makes me kinda fucking hate the actor.
Title: Re: Movies That Suck
Post by: rageaholic on January 02, 2013, 01:25:59 am
Master of disguise (2002): Every character was annoying and not one joke was funny. 
Title: Re: Movies That Suck
Post by: Sleepy on January 02, 2013, 01:41:51 am
When A Stranger Calls. It's one of the most generic horror films I've ever seen. Hot babysitter gets a phonecall from a mysterious man while she's on the job, blah blah blah. Such a waste of time.
Title: Re: Movies That Suck
Post by: Alehksunos on January 02, 2013, 02:01:51 am
Son of the Mask.

Nuff' said.

(click to show/hide)
Title: Re: Movies That Suck
Post by: Lt. Fred on January 02, 2013, 02:19:36 am
I was very disappointed by The Killing Fields. It actually wasn't amazing, and I really expected it to be.
Title: Re: Movies That Suck
Post by: Thejebusfire on January 02, 2013, 03:32:15 am
Phone Booth. It's a guy in a phone booth for an hour and a half.

Title: Re: Movies That Suck
Post by: Witchyjoshy on January 02, 2013, 04:49:39 am
SAW and all of its sequels.

The first one was basically a snore-fest.  The rest is basically just torture porn.  Everyone who tries the stop the serial killer of the movie either dies or is a complete douchebag that is completely unsympathetic.  Or both.
Title: Re: Movies That Suck
Post by: Atheissimo on January 02, 2013, 09:26:07 am
Hotel for Dogs

What the actual fuck. I was made to watch this by one of the smartest people I know, she has a starred first degree from one of the top ten universities in the UK, yet she was rendered infantile with joy by this sack of crap. The suck radiating from the television has mutated my DNA, meaning that my offspring will surely be stunted and sickly as a result of seeing this movie.

It's every heartstring tugging cliche in one; complete with orphans, puppies, misunderstood grinches and literal sad eyed puppies. I will grant that the inventions in the hotel are neat though.
Title: Re: Movies That Suck
Post by: Material Defender on January 02, 2013, 11:14:42 am
Quote from: Art Vandelay on January 02, 2013, 12:14:38 am
I've said it before, but Avatar can fuck right off. Doubly so because it brought back 3D movies.

Everyone I know have their nuts in a twist about the god damn movie, but it offended me as both a moviegoer and a sci-fi fan. It was meagerly average filled with fucking cliches. Not tropes, but cliches. Execution wasn't terrible, but not great enough to render it less than a clichestorm. My brother agrees at least a moviegoer and he tends to be the largest cinema-head in my 'know' circle.

Holy Jesus Christ, Eragon though has to be the worst movie I've ever seen. Not sure if anyone who made that movie read the damn book. Book was nothing special, but fairly enjoyable. Movie was a good awful mess.
Title: Re: Movies That Suck
Post by: nickiknack on January 02, 2013, 11:56:52 am
Quote from: Material Defender on January 02, 2013, 11:14:42 am
Holy Jesus Christ, Eragon though has to be the worst movie I've ever seen. Not sure if anyone who made that movie read the damn book. Book was nothing special, but fairly enjoyable. Movie was a good awful mess.

I know this kind of off-topic, if you're into cheesy dragon movies, I suggest Dragonslayer(1981) is full of awesome.
Title: Re: Movies That Suck
Post by: SpaceProg on January 02, 2013, 01:31:54 pm
Don't Mess with the Zohan

Uck...
Title: Re: Movies That Suck
Post by: Vypernight on January 02, 2013, 06:27:42 pm
The Austin Powers movies and the Jim Carrey Christmas Carol.  If other people want to like them, great.  My wife loves all of them, but she watches them alone because I can't stand 30 seconds of any of them (Then again, I like moves that she can't stand). 
Title: Re: Movies That Suck
Post by: Sleepy on January 02, 2013, 06:29:02 pm
Borat. Not funny in any way. I mostly wanted him to die.
Title: Re: Movies That Suck
Post by: RavynousHunter on January 02, 2013, 06:35:35 pm
Gummo.  Don't watch it, unless you want your soul shattered completely.

Oh, and Koyaanisqatsi.  Its supposed to be this big, deep film about how we're fucking the planet, but...its just a montage of random fucking clips with irritating fucking music on a god damned loop for an hour.  Fuckin Stu said it made him ashamed to be human, it made me ashamed I didn't just sleep thru the fucker when we watched it in Creative Writing class.
Title: Re: Movies That Suck
Post by: nickiknack on January 02, 2013, 06:48:42 pm
Every single version of The Women ever made.
Title: Re: Movies That Suck
Post by: Witchyjoshy on January 02, 2013, 06:53:15 pm
Quote from: Material Defender on January 02, 2013, 11:14:42 am
Holy Jesus Christ, Eragon though has to be the worst movie I've ever seen. Not sure if anyone who made that movie read the damn book. Book was nothing special, but fairly enjoyable. Movie was a good awful mess.

What's worse is, the author was actually on board and actually approved the stuff.

What the hell were you thinking, Paolini?
Title: Re: Movies That Suck
Post by: Cerim Treascair on January 02, 2013, 06:55:41 pm
Quote from: Zachski on January 02, 2013, 04:49:39 am
SAW and all of its sequels.

The first one was basically a snore-fest.  The rest is basically just torture porn.  Everyone who tries the stop the serial killer of the movie either dies or is a complete douchebag that is completely unsympathetic.  Or both.

In the same vein, Hostel and ITS sequels, and Human Centipede and ITS sequel! FUCKING DIE!
Title: Re: Movies That Suck
Post by: Osama bin Bambi on January 02, 2013, 07:31:02 pm
I think I watched some cheap B-movie about Merlin and dragons. According to the movie, you can turn people into mind-controlled slaves by making them drink dragon blood. It had possibly the shittiest CGI I have ever seen.
Title: Re: Movies That Suck
Post by: Captain Jack Harkness on January 02, 2013, 07:49:14 pm
I'm not sure I particularly despise it, but I have a really hard time taking The Fifth Element seriously.  I think the fact the Bruce Willis stars in it is actually both mind-boggling and hilarious.
Title: Re: Movies That Suck
Post by: Hades on January 02, 2013, 09:01:51 pm
Quote from: RavynousHunter on January 02, 2013, 06:35:35 pm
Gummo.  Don't watch it, unless you want your soul shattered completely.

Gummo was boring and weird.
Title: Re: Movies That Suck
Post by: Osama bin Bambi on January 02, 2013, 09:46:05 pm
Avatar was a shitty movie. It's just Pochahontas with blue people in space stretched out for three hours. The only thing remotely interesting about it is that they made a conlang for it.
Title: Re: Movies That Suck
Post by: Lt. Fred on January 03, 2013, 02:47:22 am
The Patriot is quite a sucky movie. I watched that movie only a few days after Glory, I've also seen Gettysburg- both are great. Like amazingly fantastically 10/10 great. Then the Patriot. Eugh. Propaganda for a war that's been over for centuries.
Title: Re: Movies That Suck
Post by: syaoranvee on January 03, 2013, 03:10:37 am
The Last Airbender probably would be on here for most people although I found it to be just mediocre, probably because I don't watch the show and used the movie as an excuse to eat movie popcorn.

I still don't understand why the earth people who were enslaved working with DIRT did nothing the entire time they were prisoners until the heroes showed up.
Title: Re: Movies That Suck
Post by: Mechtaur on January 03, 2013, 03:47:22 am
Quote from: syaoranvee on January 03, 2013, 03:10:37 am
The Last Airbender probably would be on here for most people although I found it to be just mediocre, probably because I don't watch the show and used the movie as an excuse to eat movie popcorn.

I still don't understand why the earth people who were enslaved working with DIRT did nothing the entire time they were prisoners until the heroes showed up.

This movie was such an absolute abomination that despite it doing insanely well in the box office, enough fans were sending death threats that M. Night Shyamalan had to cancel the idea of a second movie.

As for the part you brought up, that was just one of many fuck ups because of Night (who claimed to be a big fan of the show) being an idiot. The part that was based on, in the show, takes place on an artificial island prison that is made entirely of metal (the only "earth" is the coal used to power it). Hence why the "broken spirits" in the show, but absolutely no reason for it in the movie (not to mention the glorious Pebble Dance). I could understand having to edit out some parts to translate an entire season into a single movie, but he also hacked out meeting of numerous important characters, butchered personalities, and I won't even like to begin talking about how he managed to screw up pronunciations of names. Dragon Ball Evolution was more faithful to its source than this... Thing.

Avatar (non-airbender one) is just Dances with Wolves IN SPAAAAAACE. No more, no less.
Title: Re: Movies That Suck
Post by: Søren on January 03, 2013, 03:55:25 am
Every movie with either Seth Rogan or Jona Hill. Fuck I hate them both so much.
Also close to all basic slasher films. Friday the thirteenth, nightmare on elm street. Halloween. They are all the same unless they attempt to throw some comedy in there. Least with torture porn you get an attempt at a story line and redeeming values such as Martyrs or A Serbian Film.

Gattaca. I was never more bored in my entire life

Titanic. I was like "hurry up and sink, I get it Leo is a fuckin pretty boy"
Title: Re: Movies That Suck
Post by: R. U. Sirius on January 03, 2013, 08:34:02 am
The direct-to-video, in-name-only "Dawn of the Dead" remake.

I have nothing against bad zombie movies, but this one went BEYOND bad. Inconsistant portrayals of how much people would remember as zombies, zombies' heads exploding because they were standing near a fire, and a stupid "screamer" ending.

I also despise "Top Gun" and "Annie", but those are probably because my mom and sister, respectively, watched them so much when I was a kid. Overexposure can turn a merely generic movie into a source of pure RAGE.

I also feel "The Godfather" is highly overrated. Its entire theme seems to be "You cannot escape your destiny," probably quoted in a deep, Darth Vader voice.

(click to show/hide)
Title: Re: Movies That Suck
Post by: Vypernight on January 03, 2013, 09:08:36 am
Quote from: R. U. Sirius on January 03, 2013, 08:34:02 am
I also feel "The Godfather" is highly overrated. Its entire theme seems to be "You cannot escape your destiny," probably quoted in a deep, Darth Vader voice.

(click to show/hide)

What bothered me about it is when

(click to show/hide)
Title: Re: Movies That Suck
Post by: nickiknack on January 03, 2013, 10:20:28 am
Quote from: Deimos on January 03, 2013, 03:55:25 am
Titanic. I was like "hurry up and sink, I get it Leo is a fuckin pretty boy"

I feel better about myself now, that I'm not the only one who hated Titanic.
Title: Re: Movies That Suck
Post by: Material Defender on January 03, 2013, 11:29:28 am
Quote from: Deimos on January 03, 2013, 03:55:25 am
Titanic. I was like "hurry up and sink, I get it Leo is a fuckin pretty boy"

I literally fell asleep watching that movie.
Title: Re: Movies That Suck
Post by: Lt. Fred on January 03, 2013, 07:11:00 pm
It is blasphemy to dislike the Godfather. I will cut you.
Title: Re: Movies That Suck
Post by: largeham on January 03, 2013, 07:57:25 pm
Quote from: Empress Nicki on January 03, 2013, 10:20:28 am
Quote from: Deimos on January 03, 2013, 03:55:25 am
Titanic. I was like "hurry up and sink, I get it Leo is a fuckin pretty boy"

I feel better about myself now, that I'm not the only one who hated Titanic.

I can't think of anyone who likes it.
Title: Re: Movies That Suck
Post by: Dakota Bob on January 03, 2013, 08:13:55 pm
Quote from: Material Defender on January 03, 2013, 11:29:28 am
Quote from: Deimos on January 03, 2013, 03:55:25 am
Titanic. I was like "hurry up and sink, I get it Leo is a fuckin pretty boy"

I literally fell asleep watching that movie.

Too bad, you missed the best part of the film when the Terminator came onboard and shot DiCaprio.
Title: Re: Movies That Suck
Post by: R. U. Sirius on January 03, 2013, 09:12:49 pm
Quote from: largeham on January 03, 2013, 07:57:25 pm
Quote from: Empress Nicki on January 03, 2013, 10:20:28 am
Quote from: Deimos on January 03, 2013, 03:55:25 am
Titanic. I was like "hurry up and sink, I get it Leo is a fuckin pretty boy"

I feel better about myself now, that I'm not the only one who hated Titanic.

I can't think of anyone who likes it.

Well, there's that ONE part I like...

(click to show/hide)
Title: Re: Movies That Suck
Post by: That Guy on January 03, 2013, 10:09:45 pm
"Jason X" is a really fucking godawful movie with a stupid plot, idiotic characters, terrible dialogue, and TV movie level special effects (and this was theatrical).  However, that doesn't stop it from being thoroughly entertaining (in fact it kind of gives it the "Troll 2" effect if you know what I mean) and I will willingly buy it at some point.
Title: Re: Movies That Suck
Post by: Osama bin Bambi on January 03, 2013, 10:50:08 pm
Quote from: Deimos on January 03, 2013, 03:55:25 am
Gattaca. I was never more bored in my entire life

Thank god there is someone else out there who hates this movie as much as I do. Besides the fact that it's boring as fuck, now there are anti-intellectual assholes who think that the entire field of genetics is evil because of this movie. "But what about GATTACA?" is not a valid point at all in a discussion about GMO foods or genetic testing for deadly diseases.
Title: Re: Movies That Suck
Post by: rookie on January 04, 2013, 10:00:04 am
My bro-in-law made me watch Napoleon Dynamite. That was an hour and a half of my life gone forever.
Title: Re: Movies That Suck
Post by: R. U. Sirius on January 07, 2013, 07:28:16 pm
"Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull". I want to like this movie SO much, but Indy and aliens just don't mix in my not-always-humble opinion. I much prefer the original trilogy, where the weird powers were supernatural, not extraterrestrial.
Title: Re: Movies That Suck
Post by: largeham on January 07, 2013, 08:13:01 pm
Quote from: R. U. Sirius on January 03, 2013, 09:12:49 pm
Quote from: largeham on January 03, 2013, 07:57:25 pm
Quote from: Empress Nicki on January 03, 2013, 10:20:28 am
Quote from: Deimos on January 03, 2013, 03:55:25 am
Titanic. I was like "hurry up and sink, I get it Leo is a fuckin pretty boy"

I feel better about myself now, that I'm not the only one who hated Titanic.

I can't think of anyone who likes it.

Well, there's that ONE part I like...

(click to show/hide)

I dunno, the
(click to show/hide)
was also quite nice.
Title: Re: Movies That Suck
Post by: nickiknack on January 07, 2013, 08:24:26 pm
Quote from: R. U. Sirius on January 07, 2013, 07:28:16 pm
"Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull". I want to like this movie SO much, but Indy and aliens just don't mix in my not-always-humble opinion. I much prefer the original trilogy, where the weird powers were supernatural, not extraterrestrial.
Forgot about this one, I agree the original trilogy was way better than Kingdom of the Crystal Skull(though I'm not that keen on Temple of Doom personally). It feels like you're watching an extra long episode of Ancient Aliens.
Title: Re: Movies That Suck
Post by: Art Vandelay on January 07, 2013, 08:31:18 pm
All of the post-cold war Bond movies. It would seem that since the wall came down, everyone has forgotten that James Bond is a British spy, not a fucking generic super hero.
Title: Re: Movies That Suck
Post by: Canadian Mojo on January 07, 2013, 09:58:40 pm
Quote from: largeham on January 07, 2013, 08:13:01 pm
Quote from: R. U. Sirius on January 03, 2013, 09:12:49 pm
Quote from: largeham on January 03, 2013, 07:57:25 pm
Quote from: Empress Nicki on January 03, 2013, 10:20:28 am
Quote from: Deimos on January 03, 2013, 03:55:25 am
Titanic. I was like "hurry up and sink, I get it Leo is a fuckin pretty boy"

I feel better about myself now, that I'm not the only one who hated Titanic.

I can't think of anyone who likes it.

Well, there's that ONE part I like...

(click to show/hide)

I dunno, the
(click to show/hide)
was also quite nice.
Propeller guy.  ;D

Yes, I'm not a nice person.
Title: Re: Movies That Suck
Post by: SpaceProg on January 07, 2013, 11:07:59 pm
Quote from: Art Vandelay on January 07, 2013, 08:31:18 pm
All of the post-cold war Bond movies. It would seem that since the wall came down, everyone has forgotten that James Bond is a British spy, not a fucking generic super hero.

You know, not being that much into James Bond, but having seen several of the movies; I see what you mean now that you mention it.
Title: Re: Movies That Suck
Post by: R. U. Sirius on January 08, 2013, 08:41:18 am
The main things that annoy me about James Bond movies is that

A) Despite other characters aging and being replaced, Bond seems to get ever-younger.

B) The stupid gadgets.

C) The fact that he's somehow a world-famous superspy and NOBODY catches on to him, even when he introduces himself by name, even leaving aside the issue of a "world-famous" spy.

The Daniel Craig movies went a long way toward correcting all of these, but the fact they kept Judi Dench as M just confirmed, in my mind, that "James Bond" is a cover identity for the 007 designation, not an individual.