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Community => Society and History => Topic started by: Shane for Wax on September 10, 2013, 01:08:22 am

Title: Charlie Hunnam cast as Christian Grey
Post by: Shane for Wax on September 10, 2013, 01:08:22 am
As expected, people are taking the piss out of it.

I really don't like 50 shades. And I really hope that Charlie fans don't go to see it just cause of Charlie. But at the same time I also know the people working on it deserve to be paid even if it's a shitty film.

ANYWAYS. My favorite reactions (some of these might have nsfw text depending)

(http://31.media.tumblr.com/658fce27e563d25bd5ede0dc1a856079/tumblr_msuh2s0MLV1qgtv9vo10_500.png)
(http://31.media.tumblr.com/6dbc1b4a3f42133b372d1077af92b022/tumblr_msuh2s0MLV1qgtv9vo9_500.png)
I'm gonna use 'angrily aroused' more often now.
(http://31.media.tumblr.com/c32818646a0c28caba72a4faf417b9ff/tumblr_msuh2s0MLV1qgtv9vo8_500.png)
(http://25.media.tumblr.com/86a01d2a1afceefb3b8b1d055e642ed9/tumblr_msuh2s0MLV1qgtv9vo4_500.png)
(http://25.media.tumblr.com/e153fed0b6f8b9175d8dc9bdd39cc355/tumblr_msuh2s0MLV1qgtv9vo3_1280.png)
(http://25.media.tumblr.com/f3c52781f44b7ee83716d23d326a8e89/tumblr_msuh2s0MLV1qgtv9vo1_500.png)
Title: Re: Charlie Hunnam cast as Christian Grey
Post by: KZN02 on September 10, 2013, 01:19:33 am
(http://th01.deviantart.net/fs70/PRE/i/2013/246/d/4/50_shades_of_gipsy_danger_by_pablo_m_c-d6kurk4.jpg)
Title: Re: Charlie Hunnam cast as Christian Grey
Post by: gyeonghwa on September 10, 2013, 01:20:06 am
So am I going to have to turn this into a horrible-quotes-from-50 Shades of Grey-thread?

Quote
“Trust me, Miss Steele,” he groaned wantonly like an aching, lonely lady of the night, but manly as well because he is so manly and dominating and sultry. His voice was like liquid mercury and just as dangerous. It was titillating. “I’m very well practiced in the likes of vanilla coitus.

I totally thought the movie was just a rumor and I had no idea they'd make it into a movie, but I should have guessed as much since they'll make any book into a movie these day (except for Finnegans Wake, I'd like to see a movie made from that book.)
Title: Re: Charlie Hunnam cast as Christian Grey
Post by: Askold on September 10, 2013, 01:57:33 am
I don't get it.

Do they hate the actor or like him? Or is this just some stupid typecasting thing where they cannot accept that an actor could, you know... Act! And perhaps even play a role different than the previous one.


EDIT: Just want to add that my wife has all the books in the trilogy. I'm still pondering wether I should read them or not.
Title: Re: Charlie Hunnam cast as Christian Grey
Post by: davedan on September 10, 2013, 01:59:43 am
Gyeonghwa - Please  tell me that is not a real quote from the book?

I feel for the bugger who has to say those lines.
Title: Re: Charlie Hunnam cast as Christian Grey
Post by: gyeonghwa on September 10, 2013, 02:10:33 am
Gyeonghwa - Please  tell me that is not a real quote from the book?

I feel for the bugger who has to say those lines.

It is and here's another!

Quote
His pointer finger circled my puckered love cave. ‘Are you ready for this?’ he mewled, smirking at me like a mother hamster about to eat her three-legged young.

Cannibal hamster. I couldn't think of anything sexier myself.

Edit:
I don't get it.

Do they hate the actor or like him? Or is this just some stupid typecasting thing where they cannot accept that an actor could, you know... Act! And perhaps even play a role different than the previous one.


EDIT: Just want to add that my wife has all the books in the trilogy. I'm still pondering wether I should read them or not.

They like him but hate the book and the role of his character. It's not that he can't act but that if he acts the way the book demand it would just be . . . bad.
Title: Re: Charlie Hunnam cast as Christian Grey
Post by: Damen on September 10, 2013, 02:16:13 am
...I think that if I wanted to see Charlie Hunnam's ass I'd just watch a few of the early episodes of Sons of Anarchy.

My question isn't with the choice in casting, it's "Why the fuck is this mediocre crap in print being made into a movie?"

Seriously, is this how far the standards of literature have fallen? That this is the sort of shit that's being made into movies?
Title: Re: Charlie Hunnam cast as Christian Grey
Post by: gyeonghwa on September 10, 2013, 02:21:32 am
I'm not done yet!
(http://31.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_m90qnsYFqE1r2bilso1_500.jpg)
Title: Re: Charlie Hunnam cast as Christian Grey
Post by: Shane for Wax on September 10, 2013, 02:23:01 am
I don't get it.

Do they hate the actor or like him? Or is this just some stupid typecasting thing where they cannot accept that an actor could, you know... Act! And perhaps even play a role different than the previous one.


EDIT: Just want to add that my wife has all the books in the trilogy. I'm still pondering wether I should read them or not.

No they actually really do like him. They're just mocking how 50 shades of grey is going to go. It has nothing to do with him playing a role that is different than what he's done. It's about him actually doing 50 Shades.
Title: Re: Charlie Hunnam cast as Christian Grey
Post by: Askold on September 10, 2013, 02:30:06 am
I remember an interview of the Finnish translator for these books.

Apparently the job was pretty fun... Apart from translating the sex scenes... It's not that she was awkward doing it, it was just hard to find suitable translations for the terms the books use for sexual organs and such. She had trouble not sounding too vulgar or too clinical as both would ruin the romantic theme.

And for the record, it doesn't sound any better in Finnish. With the original text being what it is the translator tried to be faithful to it, which in this case means turning off your brain:

Quote
"No niin, nyt sinä siis olet hurmannut isänikin."

"Hänetkin?" Christianin silmissä on palava katse, ja hän kohottaa kysyvästi kulmakarvojaan ja saa minut punastumaan. Hän kohottaa kättään ja hyväilee poskeani.

"Oi Anastasia, kunpa osaisin lukea ajatuksiasi", hän kuiskaa tummalla äänellä tarttuen leukaani ja nostaen päätääni niin, että kiihkeät katseemme kohtaavat.

Henkeni on salpautua. Miten hänellä voi olla tällainen vaikutus minuun jopa keskellä väenpaljoutta?
Title: Re: Charlie Hunnam cast as Christian Grey
Post by: chitoryu12 on September 10, 2013, 02:32:53 am
Fifty Shades is unique in that it's a fanfiction. Literally: it was initially a Twilight fanfic, and the author just decided to change the names and setting and publish it.

I think when the original fic and novel were compared through a plagiarism-detecting website, they came out at 80%+ similarity.
Title: Re: Charlie Hunnam cast as Christian Grey
Post by: Damen on September 10, 2013, 02:43:31 am
both would ruin the romantic theme.

(http://media.tumblr.com/tumblr_mecbpvGM3d1qih9gi.gif)
Title: Re: Charlie Hunnam cast as Christian Grey
Post by: Shane for Wax on September 10, 2013, 02:44:58 am
50 Shades is romantic if you think an abusive relationship is romantic.
Title: Re: Charlie Hunnam cast as Christian Grey
Post by: chitoryu12 on September 10, 2013, 03:32:35 am
50 Shades is romantic if you think an abusive relationship is romantic.

Or cannibalistic hamsters.
Title: Re: Charlie Hunnam cast as Christian Grey
Post by: Askold on September 10, 2013, 04:24:29 am
50 Shades is romantic if you think an abusive relationship is romantic.

Well that was the wording the translator used. Like I said, I haven't read them yet and tried to avoid spoilers on the off chance that I would read them.
Title: Re: Charlie Hunnam cast as Christian Grey
Post by: Shane for Wax on September 10, 2013, 04:59:14 am
Either way, the posts I've seen have more been mocking the movie than Charlie.
Title: Re: Charlie Hunnam cast as Christian Grey
Post by: Dakota Bob on September 10, 2013, 06:49:20 am
Quote
His pointer finger circled my puckered love cave. ‘Are you ready for this?’ he mewled, smirking at me like a mother hamster about to eat her three-legged young.

If this arouses you, you're probably on a sex crimes registry.
Title: Re: Charlie Hunnam cast as Christian Grey
Post by: Morgenleoht on September 10, 2013, 07:04:26 am
Whaaaaat.

I should change the names and settings of my Dragon Age fanfic. It could not suck any worse than Fifty Shades.
Title: Re: Charlie Hunnam cast as Christian Grey
Post by: Witchyjoshy on September 10, 2013, 07:06:39 am
If this arouses you, you're probably on a sex crimes registry.

This is actually my first time seeing stuff from 50 Shades of Gray and all I'm thinking is "WTF!?"

THIS is the stuff that's popular lately?  THIS is what American women are wetting their pants for?

I've read Mario x Bowser crackfics that are better written than this!!
Title: Re: Charlie Hunnam cast as Christian Grey
Post by: Shane for Wax on September 10, 2013, 07:19:33 am
Welcome to my world of seeing this shit everywhere.
Title: Re: Charlie Hunnam cast as Christian Grey
Post by: chitoryu12 on September 10, 2013, 08:52:13 am
If this arouses you, you're probably on a sex crimes registry.

This is actually my first time seeing stuff from 50 Shades of Gray and all I'm thinking is "WTF!?"

THIS is the stuff that's popular lately?  THIS is what American women are wetting their pants for?

I've read Mario x Bowser crackfics that are better written than this!!

No no. Those crackfics are EXACTLY like this.
Title: Re: Charlie Hunnam cast as Christian Grey
Post by: Sleepy on September 10, 2013, 09:45:46 am
Pretty much every quote I've read from the book makes the author sound like a fucking middle schooler.
Title: Re: Charlie Hunnam cast as Christian Grey
Post by: Monzach on September 10, 2013, 10:09:39 am
@Askold: Wow...I have massive respect for the person who translated "50 Shades" into Finnish. I mean, I thought that I had a tough gig translating Christian theology books, but this garbage would be beyond me...
Title: Re: Charlie Hunnam cast as Christian Grey
Post by: Sigmaleph on September 10, 2013, 10:46:30 am
Quote
His pointer finger circled my puckered love cave. ‘Are you ready for this?’ he mewled, smirking at me like a mother hamster about to eat her three-legged young.

If this arouses you, you're probably on a sex crimes registry.

Agreed. Not because of the cannibalistic rodents, that's a perfectly acceptable kink. I mean the terrible excuse for erotic writing.
Title: Re: Charlie Hunnam cast as Christian Grey
Post by: Hades on September 10, 2013, 10:48:07 am
The more quotes from the book I read, the more I want to read the whole thing. This is like The Room of books.
Title: Re: Charlie Hunnam cast as Christian Grey
Post by: SpaceProg on September 10, 2013, 12:14:22 pm
A fanfic...?  An altered Twilight fanfic?   And it's this popular? 

My brain... where is my brain?!  It s'ploded!

Damn... I mean, from the excerpts, it doesn't even read like a good fanfic.  Nowhere even remotely close... all that flowery prose and saying way too much and trying way too hard... ugh.
Title: Re: Charlie Hunnam cast as Christian Grey
Post by: Cerim Treascair on September 10, 2013, 12:17:44 pm
A fanfic...?  An altered Twilight fanfic?   And it's this popular? 

My brain... where is my brain?!  It s'ploded!

Damn... I mean, from the excerpts, it doesn't even read like a good fanfic.  Nowhere even remotely close... all that flowery prose and saying way too much and trying way too hard... ugh.

all I can think is that it's a crappier 'My Immortal'.
Title: Re: Charlie Hunnam cast as Christian Grey
Post by: Hades on September 10, 2013, 01:14:57 pm
A fanfic...?  An altered Twilight fanfic?   And it's this popular? 

My brain... where is my brain?!  It s'ploded!

Damn... I mean, from the excerpts, it doesn't even read like a good fanfic.  Nowhere even remotely close... all that flowery prose and saying way too much and trying way too hard... ugh.

That's the beautiful thing about this. "50 Shades" is a terribly written fanfic of a terribly written story that was inspired by a horny housewife's wet dream about a sparkly vampire who's stho sthuper hawtt liek omggggg <333333333333.
Title: Re: Charlie Hunnam cast as Christian Grey
Post by: SpaceProg on September 10, 2013, 01:40:50 pm
Sparkles... God...  They don't even have fangs.  Honestly...

Eh, I'm gonna shut up.  I could go on forever.
Title: Re: Charlie Hunnam cast as Christian Grey
Post by: Witchyjoshy on September 10, 2013, 02:30:04 pm
If this arouses you, you're probably on a sex crimes registry.

This is actually my first time seeing stuff from 50 Shades of Gray and all I'm thinking is "WTF!?"

THIS is the stuff that's popular lately?  THIS is what American women are wetting their pants for?

I've read Mario x Bowser crackfics that are better written than this!!

No no. Those crackfics are EXACTLY like this.

No no, I mean those crackfics are, in fact, BETTER than this.

I'm saying that by crack fic quality, 50 Shades is bad.  BAD.  VERY BAD.
Title: Re: Charlie Hunnam cast as Christian Grey
Post by: SpaceProg on September 10, 2013, 02:35:07 pm
A small part of me is holding onto the possibility that the book is just one big troll.  For the lulz.
Title: Re: Charlie Hunnam cast as Christian Grey
Post by: PosthumanHeresy on September 10, 2013, 04:15:31 pm
Worst part is, I'm calling it now, they'll aim for PG-13.
Title: Re: Charlie Hunnam cast as Christian Grey
Post by: ironbite on September 10, 2013, 04:16:13 pm
Oh I hope so!  Just to see the train wreak outta this train wreak.
Title: Re: Charlie Hunnam cast as Christian Grey
Post by: mellenORL on September 10, 2013, 05:17:45 pm
I'd rather watch "Ass", the hit comedy movie depicted in the movie, "Idiocracy".
Title: Re: Charlie Hunnam cast as Christian Grey
Post by: MadCatTLX on September 10, 2013, 06:23:17 pm
Worst part is, I'm calling it now, they'll aim for PG-13.

Oh I've seen girls at my school reading it in class during the time the teacher wanted us to read books that we'd do a book report over. I bet those reports would be fun to read. Shit derived from shit derived from shit.

Honestly, once it comes out, I want to either 1) go with my (male) friends to see it so we can laugh at how bad it is, or 2) do a blind Let's Watch of it. When we were all hanging out a couple weeks back I quoted them some of the lines out of it since none of them had heard any. When I kicked it off with the aforementioned infamous hamster quote I didn't get past "puckered love cave" before they all burst in to laughter so hard it makes me glad no one was drinking anything. They were laughing even harder once I finished that quote. I had to clarify twice that, yes, that quote is, really, seriously, in the book.
Title: Re: Charlie Hunnam cast as Christian Grey
Post by: SpaceProg on September 10, 2013, 06:32:42 pm
Puckered love cave...

I swear... *Facepalms*
Title: Re: Charlie Hunnam cast as Christian Grey
Post by: wrightway on September 10, 2013, 06:39:14 pm
Whaaaaat.

I should change the names and settings of my Dragon Age fanfic. It could not suck any worse than Fifty Shades.

This is, sadly, becoming an accepted thing. I saw an anon meme on LJ where someone was asking for help to properly tweak their Transformers porn so it could be published as an original novel.
Title: Re: Charlie Hunnam cast as Christian Grey
Post by: Morgenleoht on September 10, 2013, 06:47:14 pm
Whaaaaat.

I should change the names and settings of my Dragon Age fanfic. It could not suck any worse than Fifty Shades.

This is, sadly, becoming an accepted thing. I saw an anon meme on LJ where someone was asking for help to properly tweak their Transformers porn so it could be published as an original novel.

To be brutally honest, I see nothing wrong with it if you can change things enough to not compromise copyright. I've read plenty of awesome fanfic authors whose stories I would read if they wrote an original novel.
Title: Re: Charlie Hunnam cast as Christian Grey
Post by: wrightway on September 10, 2013, 07:02:11 pm
Whaaaaat.

I should change the names and settings of my Dragon Age fanfic. It could not suck any worse than Fifty Shades.

This is, sadly, becoming an accepted thing. I saw an anon meme on LJ where someone was asking for help to properly tweak their Transformers porn so it could be published as an original novel.

To be brutally honest, I see nothing wrong with it if you can change things enough to not compromise copyright. I've read plenty of awesome fanfic authors whose stories I would read if they wrote an original novel.

The description that was given made it sound like "The World Translated Thus" which is the "50 shades of grey" of the Transformers fandom. It's even been compared to "my immortal." I don't mind good work being tweaked and turned into original novels. That's not good work.
Title: Re: Charlie Hunnam cast as Christian Grey
Post by: Morgenleoht on September 10, 2013, 07:07:27 pm
Whaaaaat.

I should change the names and settings of my Dragon Age fanfic. It could not suck any worse than Fifty Shades.

This is, sadly, becoming an accepted thing. I saw an anon meme on LJ where someone was asking for help to properly tweak their Transformers porn so it could be published as an original novel.

To be brutally honest, I see nothing wrong with it if you can change things enough to not compromise copyright. I've read plenty of awesome fanfic authors whose stories I would read if they wrote an original novel.

The description that was given made it sound like "The World Translated Thus" which is the "50 shades of grey" of the Transformers fandom. It's even been compared to "my immortal." I don't mind good work being tweaked and turned into original novels. That's not good work.

Well, yes. That's horrible. And people would read it. *weeps for humanity*
Title: Re: Charlie Hunnam cast as Christian Grey
Post by: MadCatTLX on September 10, 2013, 07:51:07 pm
The problem I have is that a lot of people at my school are anti-reading, bragging about how they haven't read a book since 8th grade or whatever. Then all these people of similar mentality, that of hating reading, sudden discover this "greatest book they've ever read". If 50 Shades is the best book you've read, well no god damn shit you hate reading. The thing is, I know damn well they've read better stories in English class. Some may be boring but at least they have a good story. Even the redneck reading hating kid kind of liked Count of Monte Cristo for how he went about getting revenge so on those who wronged him in such an epic way. You've read better books people, how is that soccer-mom wanking material better than The Outsiders, which I should add takes place in the city we're adjacent to.

Then there's the fact that it seems all these girls want their own Edward or Christian. Is that really the kind of relationship you want? Seriously ladies*? Are the douchebags actually right? Do you really want to be treated like shit? WHY!? I don't comprehend why this is so popular and so many think this is some kind of "ideal" relationship or something. Why do so many people like this? Why did it out sell Harry Potter? Why did it "Reignite" so many people's relationships. From what I heard the sex scene's were bland as all hell and un-arousing. How did that shit get so many soccer moms and teen girls hot and bothered.

I just... I don't understand this fucking book. I know Twilight was bad, but it didn't have damn cannibal hamsters as erotica. I had about gotten over the shit that was Twilight about the time this got out. At least I haven't heard ne reports of Twi-hards(That's what they call themselves, not my term)physically attacking anyone who doesn't say it's the best book ever. There used to be a site that listed many accounts of Twi-hard attacks, including beatings, ball-kickings, arm breaking, and at one point a 17 year old girl killed a 5 year old's goldfish because the little girl didn't absolutely love Twilight. I can't find that site, so here's a substitute I dug up in a google search. (http://anotherantitwilightsite.webs.com/attackofthetwilightfans.htm (http://anotherantitwilightsite.webs.com/attackofthetwilightfans.htm)) To be totally honest, I couldn't say the word "twilight" without a little eye twitch for a while.

(http://imageshack.us/a/img42/6210/img08081.png)

* I mean this only toward those that like this book.

Sorry, had to vent about shitty books.
Title: Re: Charlie Hunnam cast as Christian Grey
Post by: The Right Honourable Mlle Antéchrist on September 10, 2013, 08:04:58 pm
This is relevant:

(http://static.funnypik.com/pictures/1589/1588134.gif)

(From one of the 50 Shades sequels.)
Title: Re: Charlie Hunnam cast as Christian Grey
Post by: chitoryu12 on September 10, 2013, 09:07:31 pm
I went on What Does The Internet Think and put up 50 Shades of Grey.

Turns out it's almost exactly divided down the middle.

The positive reception has a slight edge.
Title: Re: Charlie Hunnam cast as Christian Grey
Post by: SpaceProg on September 10, 2013, 09:22:19 pm
GMTA.  I did the same thing. 
Title: Re: Charlie Hunnam cast as Christian Grey
Post by: PosthumanHeresy on September 10, 2013, 09:35:30 pm
I guess we should at least be happy that society is so cool with women reading (shitty, yes) BDSM porn and getting off on it. That's progress, I guess.
Title: Re: Charlie Hunnam cast as Christian Grey
Post by: Sigmaleph on September 10, 2013, 10:12:52 pm
I guess... but considering the wealth of excellent/passable/shitty-but-not-that-shitty erotic writing out there, did this have to be the one that drives progress?
Title: Re: Charlie Hunnam cast as Christian Grey
Post by: RavynousHunter on September 10, 2013, 10:32:25 pm
50 Shades is romantic if you think an abusive relationship is romantic.

Or cannibalistic hamsters.

Incidentally, my family and I actually had a cannibalistic hamster.  We named her Canna.
Title: Re: Charlie Hunnam cast as Christian Grey
Post by: chitoryu12 on September 10, 2013, 10:43:01 pm
50 Shades is romantic if you think an abusive relationship is romantic.

Or cannibalistic hamsters.

Incidentally, my family and I actually had a cannibalistic hamster.  We named her Canna.

For a short time, I had a pet piranha. Yes, I know. He came from a cousin that fled to Ohio due to some drug charges, and his father started giving away all of his possessions. One of those happened to be a large fish tank with a piranha and some other fish (a white and orange one; can't remember the type).

We named him Hannibal. After a few months of ownership, he finally ate the other fish and then died of natural causes.
Title: Re: Charlie Hunnam cast as Christian Grey
Post by: Shane for Wax on September 11, 2013, 02:52:56 pm
I guess we should at least be happy that society is so cool with women reading (shitty, yes) BDSM porn and getting off on it. That's progress, I guess.

I'd be happier if the book had not apparently spawned a bastardization of BDSM. I've been hearing disturbing shit about Doms not using safe words or deciding that using the safe word is something to be punished. It was disturbing enough for a big ol' PSA to be sent around on the importance of safe words and what you should do if a Dom says either 1) no safe words at all or 2) the use of them is grounds for punishment.
Title: Re: Charlie Hunnam cast as Christian Grey
Post by: Cerim Treascair on September 11, 2013, 03:04:50 pm
I guess we should at least be happy that society is so cool with women reading (shitty, yes) BDSM porn and getting off on it. That's progress, I guess.

I'd be happier if the book had not apparently spawned a bastardization of BDSM. I've been hearing disturbing shit about Doms not using safe words or deciding that using the safe word is something to be punished. It was disturbing enough for a big ol' PSA to be sent around on the importance of safe words and what you should do if a Dom says either 1) no safe words at all or 2) the use of them is grounds for punishment.

Seriously? got a link? I'm curious.
Title: Re: Charlie Hunnam cast as Christian Grey
Post by: Askold on September 11, 2013, 03:09:59 pm
I guess we should at least be happy that society is so cool with women reading (shitty, yes) BDSM porn and getting off on it. That's progress, I guess.

I'd be happier if the book had not apparently spawned a bastardization of BDSM. I've been hearing disturbing shit about Doms not using safe words or deciding that using the safe word is something to be punished. It was disturbing enough for a big ol' PSA to be sent around on the importance of safe words and what you should do if a Dom says either 1) no safe words at all or 2) the use of them is grounds for punishment.
Ok, that sounds bad.
Title: Re: Charlie Hunnam cast as Christian Grey
Post by: Shane for Wax on September 11, 2013, 03:12:49 pm
I guess we should at least be happy that society is so cool with women reading (shitty, yes) BDSM porn and getting off on it. That's progress, I guess.

I'd be happier if the book had not apparently spawned a bastardization of BDSM. I've been hearing disturbing shit about Doms not using safe words or deciding that using the safe word is something to be punished. It was disturbing enough for a big ol' PSA to be sent around on the importance of safe words and what you should do if a Dom says either 1) no safe words at all or 2) the use of them is grounds for punishment.

Seriously? got a link? I'm curious.

It's just the PSA, tho-  http://thelonestarkwolf.tumblr.com/post/60429204013/if-a-dom-tells-you-you-will-be-punished-for
Title: Re: Charlie Hunnam cast as Christian Grey
Post by: Cerim Treascair on September 11, 2013, 04:31:52 pm
Huh... that's a good little PSA.  Well said.
Title: Re: Charlie Hunnam cast as Christian Grey
Post by: PosthumanHeresy on September 11, 2013, 05:09:55 pm
I guess... but considering the wealth of excellent/passable/shitty-but-not-that-shitty erotic writing out there, did this have to be the one that drives progress?
I know it's awful, but hey, success is success.
I guess we should at least be happy that society is so cool with women reading (shitty, yes) BDSM porn and getting off on it. That's progress, I guess.

I'd be happier if the book had not apparently spawned a bastardization of BDSM. I've been hearing disturbing shit about Doms not using safe words or deciding that using the safe word is something to be punished. It was disturbing enough for a big ol' PSA to be sent around on the importance of safe words and what you should do if a Dom says either 1) no safe words at all or 2) the use of them is grounds for punishment.

Seriously? got a link? I'm curious.

It's just the PSA, tho-  http://thelonestarkwolf.tumblr.com/post/60429204013/if-a-dom-tells-you-you-will-be-punished-for
Oh, that is most certainly horrible. I will gladly agree, that is a whole big pile of what-the-fuckery. Safewords are very important, people! I'd never tell my girlfriend to not use the safeword. First, that's awful. Secondly, she'd kill me, which is also awful. But, seriously, that is never acceptable.
Title: Re: Charlie Hunnam cast as Christian Grey
Post by: Witchyjoshy on September 11, 2013, 06:55:22 pm
I guess we should at least be happy that society is so cool with women reading (shitty, yes) BDSM porn and getting off on it. That's progress, I guess.

I'd be happier if the book had not apparently spawned a bastardization of BDSM. I've been hearing disturbing shit about Doms not using safe words or deciding that using the safe word is something to be punished. It was disturbing enough for a big ol' PSA to be sent around on the importance of safe words and what you should do if a Dom says either 1) no safe words at all or 2) the use of them is grounds for punishment.

Holy shit.

As someone whose fetishes can make for a "lighter" version of BDSM, I gotta say, safe words are still the most important thing.  Even if your fetish is not being able to use a safe word, then have your "pretend" safe word, then a REAL safe word that you use when you actually need to.
Title: Re: Charlie Hunnam cast as Christian Grey
Post by: The Right Honourable Mlle Antéchrist on September 11, 2013, 07:24:45 pm
If I was going to choose a safe word/phrase for BDSM, it would be the least sexy thing I could think of, in order to drive things to a screeching halt. Like, "Rush Limbaugh On the Toilet" or something.
Title: Re: Charlie Hunnam cast as Christian Grey
Post by: PosthumanHeresy on September 11, 2013, 07:38:57 pm
If I was going to choose a safe word/phrase for BDSM, it would be the least sexy thing I could think of, in order to drive things to a screeching halt. Like, "Rush Limbaugh On the Toilet" or something.
"Deformity" works well.
Title: Re: Charlie Hunnam cast as Christian Grey
Post by: SpaceProg on September 11, 2013, 07:42:17 pm
*Still looking incredulous*

It was a Twilight fanfic???
Title: Re: Charlie Hunnam cast as Christian Grey
Post by: Morgenleoht on September 11, 2013, 07:44:30 pm
*Still looking incredulous*

It was a Twilight fanfic???

Yes, known as Master of the Universe or some such rubbish.
Title: Re: Charlie Hunnam cast as Christian Grey
Post by: SpaceProg on September 11, 2013, 07:47:38 pm
The world... makes absolutely no sense to me now...
Title: Re: Charlie Hunnam cast as Christian Grey
Post by: The Right Honourable Mlle Antéchrist on September 11, 2013, 08:09:51 pm
Ten bucks says it was originally one of those crappy AUs where the author was like "I want to change every detail that makes this story what it is so I can write down my creepy, unrealistic fantasy, but I'm too lazy to flesh out my own characters".
Title: Re: Charlie Hunnam cast as Christian Grey
Post by: SpaceProg on September 11, 2013, 08:14:05 pm
I'd rather read a Doctor Who/Dukes of Hazzard crossover.
Title: Re: Charlie Hunnam cast as Christian Grey
Post by: MadCatTLX on September 11, 2013, 08:14:22 pm
Ten bucks says it was originally one of those crappy AUs where the author was like "I want to change every detail that makes this story what it is so I can write down my creepy, unrealistic fantasy, but I'm too lazy to flesh out my own characters".

Oh no. I've not read either series, but from the summaries, overviews, and commentaries I've seen, the Twilight can be seen leaking through. If nothing else, then there's that whole dynamic of the relationship that's one of the most fucked I've ever seen. The main guy's a twat and the girl's naive as all hell.
Title: Re: Charlie Hunnam cast as Christian Grey
Post by: LeTipex on September 11, 2013, 10:29:26 pm
I guess we should at least be happy that society is so cool with women reading (shitty, yes) BDSM porn and getting off on it. That's progress, I guess.

I'd be happier if the book had not apparently spawned a bastardization of BDSM. I've been hearing disturbing shit about Doms not using safe words or deciding that using the safe word is something to be punished. It was disturbing enough for a big ol' PSA to be sent around on the importance of safe words and what you should do if a Dom says either 1) no safe words at all or 2) the use of them is grounds for punishment.

As an occasionnal Dom myself, that drives me fucking nuts. The only time I heard of another Dom refusing safewords, I gave him a public chewing out and ended that by slapping him as hard as I could. That is NOT something you do. Ever.

I'd rather read a Doctor Who/Dukes of Hazzard crossover.

Are you kidding? I'd read that in a flash! That sounds awesome!
Title: Re: Charlie Hunnam cast as Christian Grey
Post by: SpaceProg on September 11, 2013, 10:38:31 pm
Quote from: LeTipex
Are you kidding? I'd read that in a flash! That sounds awesome!
Well... if I'm being completely honest with myself... so would I. :p
Title: Re: Charlie Hunnam cast as Christian Grey
Post by: gyeonghwa on September 11, 2013, 10:44:25 pm
More from the book:
Quote
“Ana,” he smiles his dazzling toothy all-Hispanic-American smile, and I can’t be angry with him anymore.

There's an "all-Hispanic-American" smile?
Title: Re: Charlie Hunnam cast as Christian Grey
Post by: SpaceProg on September 11, 2013, 10:49:49 pm
GEEZ... Someone needs to MST that entire book... then maybe I'll read it. :p
Title: Re: Charlie Hunnam cast as Christian Grey
Post by: Igor on September 11, 2013, 10:57:39 pm
GEEZ... Someone needs to MST that entire book... then maybe I'll read it. :p
Here's a sporking (http://conjugalfelicity.com/fifty-shades-of-grey/). It's not line by line, but it's enough to get the gist of it. Have fun.
Title: Re: Charlie Hunnam cast as Christian Grey
Post by: SpaceProg on September 11, 2013, 11:19:11 pm
Woohoo!  *clicks*
Title: Re: Charlie Hunnam cast as Christian Grey
Post by: lord gibbon on September 11, 2013, 11:45:07 pm
The poor bastard. He has no idea what he's getting into.
Title: Re: Charlie Hunnam cast as Christian Grey
Post by: MadCatTLX on September 12, 2013, 12:46:42 am
You know, I really hope they find a way to work in the hamster quote and a few other of the really weird ones.
Title: Re: Charlie Hunnam cast as Christian Grey
Post by: Askold on September 12, 2013, 12:52:02 am
I am still convinced that this "Hunnam" person is an alien or at least an hybrid with alien ancestors.

I mean seriously, "Hunnam?" That's what you get when some alien who drunkenly crashed his saucer on Earth is furiously trying to blend in with the locals while learning a new language and suffering from massive hangover.

-What's your name?
-(Don't say alien!Don't say alien!Don't say alien!Don't say alien!) I'M A HUMAN!!! ...I mean... My name is Hu...nam.
-How do you spell that?
Title: Re: Charlie Hunnam cast as Christian Grey
Post by: Shane for Wax on September 12, 2013, 01:25:00 am
In other news, Charlie says the sex scenes won't be a problem for him:

Quote
Hunnam, 33, said the upcoming adaptation of EL James' bestselling "mommy porn" literary sensation, in which he will star as kinky billionaire Christian opposite Dakota Johnson's blushing virgin Ana, would be a walk in the park when compared to shoots for Channel 4 drama Queer as Folk 14 years ago.

"You know what, I had such a baptism of fire with regards to sexuality on camera at the beginning of my career," Hunnam told the Associated Press while promoting the season premiere of US TV series Sons of Anarchy. "I starred in the British Channel Four miniseries Queer as Folk, where I played a young, gay character, and there were some incredible, explicit sex scenes on that show. ... Now I am 16 years older and more mature so I don't anticipate them being too much of a problem. It's like anything else, just an exciting challenge."

http://www.theguardian.com/film/2013/sep/09/fifty-shades-of-grey-sex-scenes-charlie-hunnam-no-problem
Title: Re: Charlie Hunnam cast as Christian Grey
Post by: Witchyjoshy on September 12, 2013, 01:38:30 am
Please don't compare Queer as Folk with 50 Shades :S
Title: Re: Charlie Hunnam cast as Christian Grey
Post by: Askold on September 12, 2013, 01:52:19 am
Please don't compare Queer as Folk with 50 Shades :S
He didn't sat those are the same.

Just that Queer as folk had sex scenes and that he does not have a problem with sex scenes.
Title: Re: Charlie Hunnam cast as Christian Grey
Post by: Shane for Wax on September 12, 2013, 02:17:10 am
Please don't compare Queer as Folk with 50 Shades :S

He wasn't? I mean only insofar as the fact that they both have sex scenes, I guess.
Title: Re: Charlie Hunnam cast as Christian Grey
Post by: Sigmaleph on September 12, 2013, 02:16:54 pm
I am still convinced that this "Hunnam" person is an alien or at least an hybrid with alien ancestors.

I mean seriously, "Hunnam?" That's what you get when some alien who drunkenly crashed his saucer on Earth is furiously trying to blend in with the locals while learning a new language and suffering from massive hangover.

-What's your name?
-(Don't say alien!Don't say alien!Don't say alien!Don't say alien!) I'M A HUMAN!!! ...I mean... My name is Hu...nam.
-How do you spell that?

http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/HughMann
Title: Re: Charlie Hunnam cast as Christian Grey
Post by: SpaceProg on September 12, 2013, 02:22:16 pm
I read the Sporking I was given the link to.  Now I have a good idea of the book and I can say this...  I'm definitely a better writer than the writer of 50 Shades of Grey.  Heck, I can even write stories set in Britain with more believability and I'm a Yank.  E. L. James can't seem to understand how real people talk... let alone American real people.
If anyone here needs a pick-me-up as far as feeling better about your writing abilities... just give that book (or the sporking) a gander.
Title: Re: Charlie Hunnam cast as Christian Grey
Post by: Igor on September 12, 2013, 07:18:01 pm
I read the Sporking I was given the link to.  Now I have a good idea of the book and I can say this...  I'm definitely a better writer than the writer of 50 Shades of Grey.  Heck, I can even write stories set in Britain with more believability and I'm a Yank.  E. L. James can't seem to understand how real people talk... let alone American real people.
If anyone here needs a pick-me-up as far as feeling better about your writing abilities... just give that book (or the sporking) a gander.
Even better, check out the sporking of  the Maradonia saga (http://conjugalfelicity.com/maradonia/) (and the book trailer, and basically all things Gloria Tesch.)
Title: Re: Charlie Hunnam cast as Christian Grey
Post by: SpaceProg on September 12, 2013, 09:27:43 pm
I've got that whole bloody site bookmarked now.  Thanks, Random.  You've really given me some good stuff to read. :)
Title: Re: Charlie Hunnam cast as Christian Grey
Post by: Shane for Wax on October 12, 2013, 07:57:24 pm
http://www.eonline.com/news/469609/charlie-hunnam-will-not-be-christian-grey-drops-out-of-fifty-shades-of-grey-movie

YAY!

I have never been so excited to see an actor drop out of a movie.

The fact that E!Online calls it a 'coveted' role just makes me laugh.
Title: Re: Charlie Hunnam cast as Christian Grey
Post by: SpaceProg on October 12, 2013, 09:58:05 pm
So coveted that he didn't want it.
Title: Re: Charlie Hunnam cast as Christian Grey
Post by: Ghoti on October 12, 2013, 11:49:43 pm
I don't really have anything to say about 50 Shades other than it's hilariously terrible, I just wanted to thank randomwolf42 for the links to the excellent sporkings. 10+ internets to you good sir. *hat tip*
Title: Re: Charlie Hunnam cast as Christian Grey
Post by: chitoryu12 on October 13, 2013, 02:24:01 pm
Quote
I don't really have anything to say about 50 Shades other than it's hilariously terrible, I just wanted to thank randomwolf42 for the links to the excellent sporkings. 10+ internets to you good sir. *hat tip*

Yeah, I'm addicted to that site now.
Title: Re: Charlie Hunnam cast as Christian Grey
Post by: Meshakhad on October 28, 2013, 05:08:33 pm
OK, who do we want to see in his place?

I suggest Christian Slater, with Kim Kardashian opposite him.
Title: Re: Charlie Hunnam cast as Christian Grey
Post by: niam2023 on October 28, 2013, 05:32:24 pm
I don't mind Charlie as this Christian Grey. I wanna see him look "as gleeful as a mother hamster about to eat her three limbed young."
Title: Re: Charlie Hunnam cast as Christian Grey
Post by: Shane for Wax on October 28, 2013, 05:34:42 pm
He already dropped out, tho.

Apparently Jamie Dornan is now Christian Grey (http://www.nydailynews.com/entertainment/tv-movies/e-james-confirms-jamie-dornan-cast-fifty-shades-grey-film-article-1.1496745).
Title: Re: Charlie Hunnam cast as Christian Grey
Post by: Witchyjoshy on October 28, 2013, 07:04:09 pm
Wouldn't it be hilarious if we had to go through every famous male actor until eventually there were none left?

Then they have to go to some B-Movie star who makes Bella Swan look like Kristen Stewart actually liked her role.
Title: Re: Charlie Hunnam cast as Christian Grey
Post by: Meshakhad on October 28, 2013, 08:33:57 pm
No, wait, I have the perfect actor: George Takei.

How hilarious would that be?
Title: Re: Charlie Hunnam cast as Christian Grey
Post by: Igor on October 28, 2013, 09:07:01 pm
I'll just leave this here:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nriXYq10oVA
Title: Re: Charlie Hunnam cast as Christian Grey
Post by: SpaceProg on October 28, 2013, 10:28:59 pm
No, wait, I have the perfect actor: George Takei.

How hilarious would that be?

Oh my!


Comedy gold. 
Title: Re: Charlie Hunnam cast as Christian Grey
Post by: Witchyjoshy on October 28, 2013, 10:50:21 pm
50 Shades of Takei.
Title: Re: Charlie Hunnam cast as Christian Grey
Post by: chitoryu12 on October 29, 2013, 12:15:36 am
50 Shades of Takei.

Then retroactively translate this from the "It's Okay To Be Takei" video, and it's now 50 Shades of Gay.

There's so many layers of pun.
Title: Re: Charlie Hunnam cast as Christian Grey
Post by: Meshakhad on October 29, 2013, 12:38:04 am
OK, who should be opposite Takei?

Got it. Judi Dench.
Title: Re: Charlie Hunnam cast as Christian Grey
Post by: dpareja on October 29, 2013, 01:11:18 am
OK, who should be opposite Takei?

Got it. Judi Dench.

Where's the Kickstarter to get the rights to do this?  :P  Because if it exists...

(http://images.lazygamer.net/2012/10/shut-up-and-take-my-money-480x300.jpg)