Kirk Cameron nearly sacrificed by Druid High Priest

[MadCatTLX]

I personally would like to go up to his car on a foggy day and draw dongs all over the windshield condensation.

It's best if the fog lifts and the condensation melts before he gets back to his car. After that he'll see penises randomly appearing on his windshield when the sun hits it at the right angle and start freaking out.

"Oh my God! It's Jesus dick on my car! EVERYONE JESUS' DICK IS ON MY CAR!!!" That's about how it'd go.

[Bezron]

Alternatively, we could get back to ignoring that Cameron even exists.  Of all the things we could do to him, that would upset him the most.

This.  For those of you who might not remember the 80's, he wasn't actually that big of a star.  He was on TV and maybe in a handful of forgettable movies.  His sister was actually the bigger star.  Whoever decided that a washed up egotistical actor is someone who is an authority on ANYTHING is a complete fucking troll

[niam2023]

Well, I have the perfect place for him, named slightly differently, in my interquel novel.

an accidental kill by the filler villain.

[Rabbit of Caerbannog]

To quote these assclowns: Have you ever told a lie? That makes you a liar.

[Quasirodent]

Have you ever eaten a vegetable?  That makes you a vegetarian!
Have you ever killed an insect?  That makes you an exterminator!
Have you ever had an erection?  That makes you a pervert!
Have you ever had a cold?  That makes you a disease-ridden leper!

Logic, I gots it!

[N. De Plume]

Can we at least invite him to a meeting where feathered dinosaur fossils are discussed and mentioned repeatedly as "perfect intermediates between crocodiles and ducks?"

A perfect example of the satirist agenda.

Do you suppose there is a good way to combine the two? Plus throw on the dicks-on-the-windshield thing. There has got to be a way to do that artificially, should it prove to not be a foggy day.

[DasFuchs]

I have a brilliant plan.

I will call Cameron and say there is a dangerous, underground Satanist group in my neighborhood led by someone high up in the city govt hierarchy, and we need someone to see what they're up to.

Its either gonna be him, or that brat O'Keefe, if he's out.

Then, me and my friends pretend to be Satanists, and when a new guy shows up, we attack, beating up Kirk Cameron / James O'Keefe.

Then we have the satisfaction of beating up an obnoxious idiot.

I was hoping you were going for an epic troll. The current ending makes me disappoint