Fahrenheit: According to the developers, sexytimes should not be just a cut scene, but also a quick time event. I kid you not.
We know how well that worked out for Rockstar Games, don't we? :P
Planescape: Torment: You walk into a bar and the barman sells you an eyeball in a jar of $500. What do you do? Why, you rip out one of your eyes and shove your new purchase in the socket.
Planescape: Torment: You walk into a bar and the barman sells you an eyeball in a jar of $500. What do you do? Why, you rip out one of your eyes and shove your new purchase in the socket.
If you're an immortal regenerating amnesiac who apparently possesses the power of genetic memory and it was your own eyeball, this makes perfect sense. A more worrisome example of the pre-game logic is that the barkeep was okay with taking some guy's eye for collateral on his tab.
Planescape: Torment: You walk into a bar and the barman sells you an eyeball in a jar of $500. What do you do? Why, you rip out one of your eyes and shove your new purchase in the socket.
If you're an immortal regenerating amnesiac who apparently possesses the power of genetic memory and it was your own eyeball, this makes perfect sense. A more worrisome example of the pre-game logic is that the barkeep was okay with taking some guy's eye for collateral on his tab.
It sounded better without the context.
Though there's also the matter of the barman charging you $500 quid for your own eyeball in a jar, but he's perfectly fine with you reviving and simply walking away with Ignus, the main attraction of his establishment. It would be like the owner of a gentleman's club not batting en eyelid at you just waltzing in and taking all the strippers away.
I also have The longest journey, the game is beautiful and the story isn't bad but most of the puzzles would fit into this thread.You just reminded me somehow of another gem from The Longest Journey. Need to get into the office building of the imitation-Scientologists to stop their leader from fucking everything up? First, try to argue your way past the receptionist. Fail miserably, then return ten seconds later holding a pizza box you dug out of the garbage, put on the worst Bronx accent you possibly can and say you have a pizza for the CEO. You'll be buzzed straight through without so much as a second glance.
I hate when games throw random puzzles in that have no business being there. Puzzles can be fun and all, but they should at least make some kind of sense.
Also, the Hitchhiker's guide to the galaxy game by Infocom. Where you must feed a sandwich to a dog at the very start of the game or else lose halfway through the game.To be fair, the Hitchikers guite was a text game who's only purpose was a series of guess and check. You know, fake challenge. So you should probably just list that game.
Streets of Rage: You should always pick up and eat random apples and turkey legs that are lying on the ground. In a city street. In the bad part of town.Castlevania. Break wall, find chicken?! WTF?!
BioWare's fascination with the Tower of Hanoi. There are so many ways advanced alien civilizations could secure their technology, but they all use the same puzzle. (I know it shows up in KotOR and ME1. Probably other games, but those are the ones I remember.)
BioWare's fascination with the Tower of Hanoi. There are so many ways advanced alien civilizations could secure their technology, but they all use the same puzzle. (I know it shows up in KotOR and ME1. Probably other games, but those are the ones I remember.)
Just to comment on this, I was stuck on this in ME 1 for quite some time because I simply refused to believe that they used the Tower of Hanoi Puzzle for what amounted to flipping the breakers. Then for giggles I tried it, was done in about 30 seconds or so.
Another thing:
Finding power ups in random locations is not out of place in some simple 2d platformer but as the FPS games keep getting more "realistic" it gets a bit weird when you are supposed to go look for a health pack in a toilet or on top of a airduct. If the game world is supposed to seem realistic then you should try to put the ammo and power ups in logical places. When Mario finds a green mushroom that gives him extra lives it fits in with the world which already is surreal and not that serious, but even in Jedi Knight games it is a bit jarring that the empire hides stuff in places where you can only get to with force jumps. (Not to mention that many of the guards can only get to their work area by airlift.)
If you are about to do an ice themed dungeon (in a game that does top-down view), odds are you're going to be doing a least one "Slide from block to block in a correct order until you get to the other side" If it's an ice themed platformer, odds are that you're going to be careful how you jump, as you will be sliding more.Zelda, we're looking at YOU. ;) Or... I am, at least.
Of course, with most Silent Hill games, logic is thrown out the window and bashed with a twisty stick until completely unrecognizable... but it's still there. Sorta. Wallet in toilet notwithstanding. I mean... Ew.
Or light bulbs inside a sealed food can (Silent Hill 2). How's that for a light snack? Ugh. Sorry.
(Adventure games everywhere)
Beyond Good and Evil: Aliens faking their being a friendly force to assist against another alien invasion? This calls for racing hovercrafts and taking pictures of animals.
With very few exceptions, in most RPG and adventure games you're free just to go into any random person's house and ransack their entire place while they stand there and watch you like an idiot.
With very few exceptions, in most RPG and adventure games you're free just to go into any random person's house and ransack their entire place while they stand there and watch you like an idiot.
And in Skyrim, they let you do this as long as you're their friend (which means you did a quest for them)
Granted, they won't let you ransack EVERYTHING, but still.
What's funny is that you can ransack a merchant-friend's house-shop and then immediately sell them everything you just took.
"Can I have this lovely blue vase?"
"Of course! You're my friend."
"Great! Now how much can I sell it to you for?"
With very few exceptions, in most RPG and adventure games you're free just to go into any random person's house and ransack their entire place while they stand there and watch you like an idiot.
With very few exceptions, in most RPG and adventure games you're free just to go into any random person's house and ransack their entire place while they stand there and watch you like an idiot.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kedjhnguKhc
That game is beyond Nintendo Hard.
I like when I find gold inside of a dead wolf.
"No Cloud, I have no idea why that monster was carrying 500 Gold and a Fire Ring. It will forever remain a mystery!"
I like when I find gold inside of a dead wolf.
"No Cloud, I have no idea why that monster was carrying 500 Gold and a Fire Ring. It will forever remain a mystery!"
Also, you can only use a key once. Even though they're all identical in every dungeon.
(http://i49.photobucket.com/albums/f278/katietiedrich/comic20.jpg)
Hey, there's another thing. Why does magic often get applied to mundane problems? Shouldn't it take MORE energy to operate an elevator through magic than by a simple pully system? And even if that's not the case, it would be expensive. In most settings, magic materials are rare & valuable, while wizards are highly trained specialists. This is particularly bad in settings that try to combine magic & advanced technology. Don't get me wrong, I like that, but it helps if you know what to put where, as opposed to just slapping shit together.
How can you have a thread like this without mentioning the omnipresent red exploding barrels?
Explosives in games. You know em when you see em, those big, red things that explode violently when you so much as sneeze on them by accident. If these things are so volatile that they can be set off by (giving examples from DDO) being struck by a wooden fucking stick, being pierced by an arrow...OR BEING HIT BY A FUCKING MAGIC RAY OF COLD...why aren't they behind lock-and-key in a secure location where their exceptionally volatile contents don't run the chance of killing people by sheer happenstance? You'd think that places like Stormreach would have laws about that kinda shit...
Hey, there's another thing. Why does magic often get applied to mundane problems? Shouldn't it take MORE energy to operate an elevator through magic than by a simple pully system? And even if that's not the case, it would be expensive. In most settings, magic materials are rare & valuable, while wizards are highly trained specialists. This is particularly bad in settings that try to combine magic & advanced technology. Don't get me wrong, I like that, but it helps if you know what to put where, as opposed to just slapping shit together.
The fact that I can somehow carry a sword, two or three different shields, a bag full of bombs, a hookshot, a longbow, a slingshot, three bottles of potions, 300 Rupees, and tons of other items just by stuffing them into my tunic comes to mind.
Just where do video game heroes keep all this stuff, anyhow?
The fact that I can somehow carry a sword, two or three different shields, a bag full of bombs, a hookshot, a longbow, a slingshot, three bottles of potions, 300 Rupees, and tons of other items just by stuffing them into my tunic comes to mind.
Just where do video game heroes keep all this stuff, anyhow?
Bag of holding.
The fact that I can somehow carry a sword, two or three different shields, a bag full of bombs, a hookshot, a longbow, a slingshot, three bottles of potions, 300 Rupees, and tons of other items just by stuffing them into my tunic comes to mind.
Just where do video game heroes keep all this stuff, anyhow?
The fact that I can somehow carry a sword, two or three different shields, a bag full of bombs, a hookshot, a longbow, a slingshot, three bottles of potions, 300 Rupees, and tons of other items just by stuffing them into my tunic comes to mind.
Just where do video game heroes keep all this stuff, anyhow?
By the time you get to the end of Assassin's Creed: Brotherhood, Ezio is outfitted with:
1 long robe,
1 full set of plate armor,
1 sword,
1 dagger,
2 hidden blades, (with a poison vial)
3 smoke bombs,
15 poison darts,
25 throwing knives,
A crossbow with 25 arrows,
A gun with 10 bullets,
And 15 medicine vials.
Which of course raises the question, how does he even move, let alone scale completely flat walls.
Saint's Row: Blocking traffic is a crime punishable by death on the spot. Also, speeding and going the wrong way down a one-way road is okay, but if you so much as sneeze on a cop car, they will run over anyone in their way to beat you to death.
Saint's Row: Blocking traffic is a crime punishable by death on the spot. Also, speeding and going the wrong way down a one-way road is okay, but if you so much as sneeze on a cop car, they will run over anyone in their way to beat you to death.
The fact that I can somehow carry a sword, two or three different shields, a bag full of bombs, a hookshot, a longbow, a slingshot, three bottles of potions, 300 Rupees, and tons of other items just by stuffing them into my tunic comes to mind.
Just where do video game heroes keep all this stuff, anyhow?
Skyrim; It takes 45 seconds to enter or exit a building or town.
I've seen a few wrecks, and been in one bad one in my lifetime so far. Playing GTA, I can't help but notice how each and every car is made out of napalm. RL cars do NOT explode so darn easily or frequently.
I've seen a few wrecks, and been in one bad one in my lifetime so far. Playing GTA, I can't help but notice how each and every car is made out of napalm. RL cars do NOT explode so darn easily or frequently.
I've seen a few wrecks, and been in one bad one in my lifetime so far. Playing GTA, I can't help but notice how each and every car is made out of napalm. RL cars do NOT explode so darn easily or frequently.
Skyrim; It takes 45 seconds to enter or exit a building or town.
Are you talking about the loading screens? I wouldn't really count that as video game logic.
Are you talking about the loading screens? I wouldn't really count that as video game logic.
Also in Skyrim, telling someone they're attractive is the equivelant of a marriage proposal.
Axes, Spears, and Maces are all worse than Swords.
And, by extension, arrows are by far the worst weapon you can possibly use. You might as well be flicking popcorn at the enemy.
And after all that, they never even ask for the book back. At least in Skyrim the guards would confiscate your stolen goods. (Although now that I think about it, why in the holy fuck am I labeling my stolen goods as stolen goods in the first place?)
And, by extension, arrows are by far the worst weapon you can possibly use. You might as well be flicking popcorn at the enemy.
Been playing Kingdom of Amalur recently, and I've noticed something AGAIN that has bugged me in nearly every fantasy game I've ever played.
I steal something utterly worthless like a book or something, and the entire goddamn town instantly turns hostile, everyone attacks me, and the guards run up and try to kill me. If I refuse to fight back, the guards will, after a few seconds, stop and try to arrest me. I can now pay a fine....of SEVEN THOUSAND GOLD. So, I steal a book, by some weird telepathy everyone instantly knows I stole the book, and they all instantly forget all their plot-driven squabbles and conflicts to band together like a trio of Italian sisters when one of them gets picked on at school. And when is all said and done I have to pay a fine for my horrible crime of enough gold to buy half the damn town.
And after all that, they never even ask for the book back. At least in Skyrim the guards would confiscate your stolen goods. (Although now that I think about it, why in the holy fuck am I labeling my stolen goods as stolen goods in the first place?)
Meanwhile, in Skyrim...
"I just shot a dragon in the tail twice with an arrow while sneaking. And he died."
Meanwhile, in Skyrim...
"I just shot a dragon in the tail twice with an arrow while sneaking. And he died."
Meanwhile, in Skyrim...
"I just shot a dragon in the tail twice with an arrow while sneaking. And he died."
Bitch please. I bopped one on the nose with a shield and it died.
I'm a being of near-divine arcane might, yet I still get talked down to by the city guards. Riddle me THAT, RPGs.
I don't think they do in FF games... at least I don't remember them doing so. 'Tis why float is so useful when going against a boss/monster that spams Quake.
I killed the boss "Leonard" in Silent Hill 3 by repeatedly stomping him in the crotch.
That's one reason why I like Deus Ex. You don't have a single pool of hit points, but separate regions for each body part, and you can only die from hit point depletion of the head and torso. Arms and legs just renders you unable to use weapons and unable to walk respectively.
That's one reason why I like Deus Ex. You don't have a single pool of hit points, but separate regions for each body part, and you can only die from hit point depletion of the head and torso. Arms and legs just renders you unable to use weapons and unable to walk respectively.
Dwarf Fortress takes that one step further. Only a weapon through the brain or a 10 storey drop is always fatal . Each limb, finger, toe and major organ has its own damage measurement (bruise, fracture, compound fracture, break, shatter etc).
In the early generations at least, Earthquake kills Zapdos because it is an Electric type. Even though it is a bird. Even though it is assumed to be flying.
WAT.
Earthquake type attacks can affect any and all flying monsters. While flying, mind.Not in Pokémon, as of current Gen. Flying types, those with "hover" ability, and using moves that take them "off the plane of battle" ignore Ground based attacks.
Why is everyone and their grandmother talking about Pokemon and how it doesn't fit my complaint? LOLBecause I think all of us had this reaction playing the game:
I think most of us were talking about Final Fantasy.Hm... maybe if the ground opens up under you, swallows you, then closes... that's been a lot of quake type animation.
Really, I don't understand Quake to begin with. Correct me if I'm wrong, but an earthquake alone doesn't usually kill you. Usually, it'll be some shit falling on you, or something.
I think most of us were talking about Final Fantasy.Hm... maybe if the ground opens up under you, swallows you, then closes... that's been a lot of quake type animation.
Really, I don't understand Quake to begin with. Correct me if I'm wrong, but an earthquake alone doesn't usually kill you. Usually, it'll be some shit falling on you, or something.
Catherine the Great will flirt with anything that moves, and sometimes, moving is not required at all.
might have already been mentioned, or a similar one, but in Skyrim I was swimming down to an old shipwreck at the bottom of the Ghost Sea, and in a barrel in the hold there were perfectly good potatoes and carrots.
Civilization games:The Age of Empires games aren't much better. If you had a type advantage (machine gun vs rifleman, for example), you'd mow the fucker down in about two volleys. If it wasn't an explicit advantage, such as tank vs rifleman, they did exactly 1 point of damage to each other. I'm pretty sure an HE tank round would ruin damn near anything's day, regardless of what it was shot at.
Modern tanks and helicopters are no match for medieval archers.
Everyone uses the same currency.
Catherine the Great will flirt with anything that moves, and sometimes, moving is not required at all.
Ghandi is a nuke-loving, omnicidal sociopath!
Does Wish count as a simple spell? Because I've been tempted to simply wish doors away.
Some doors in NWN have "complicated locks" and are "warded against simple spells," so I must "find the proper key."
You can shoot a bunch of arrows into an enemy's face in Skyrim and he doesn't seem to be impaired at all
I like how video game designers clearly overlook that the attire they give some female characters (such as Ivy from Soul Calibur) make fighting really burdensome.
It's not just the women who wear batshit stupid armor...
(http://madartlab.com/files/2011/12/Dude-e1324147428339.png)
It's not just the women who wear batshit stupid armor...
(http://madartlab.com/files/2011/12/Dude-e1324147428339.png)
I just realized...how the fuck are locked doors completely impassable?
Especially in a game where I have a magical ability to open any lock?!
On the subject of ridiculous female armor, here's a nice tumblr page full of examples of not ridiculous female armor.
http://womenfighters.tumblr.com/archive (http://womenfighters.tumblr.com/archive)
The Sims, Bustin' Out: Women like to play strip poker with each other and watch each other take showers.There something odd about that?
The Sims, Bustin' Out: Women like to play strip poker with each other and watch each other take showers.
The fact that it happened so quickly (I had set up the house with the women in it, after 5 minutes it looked like an orgy), took me by surprise.What, you put all those women in a confined space, what do you expect to happen? It's pillow fights and lesbian love all around!
The fact that the concept of physics doesnt seem to exist in Just Cause 2. (riding the top of a jet while shooting at another jet with an SMG)
The Sims, Bustin' Out: Women like to play strip poker with each other and watch each other take showers.
Hey this isn't "porn movie logic" go complain about those cliches in a separate topic.
One thing that really annoyed me in Fallout3 was that every single underground tunnel had working electric lights and computers. Other Fallout games had some explanation for working machines and electronics and they either kept them sparse as in few working machines in a abandoned vault or had them in communities which were able to produce their electricity and maintain the equipment.
Even in New Vegas they atleast had batteries attached to the street lights in the small towns (Personally I would have left out those lamps.) but in F3 every single subway tunnel has working lights and power outlets.
The Sims, Bustin' Out: Women like to play strip poker with each other and watch each other take showers.
Hey this isn't "porn movie logic" go complain about those cliches in a separate topic.
One thing that really annoyed me in Fallout3 was that every single underground tunnel had working electric lights and computers. Other Fallout games had some explanation for working machines and electronics and they either kept them sparse as in few working machines in a abandoned vault or had them in communities which were able to produce their electricity and maintain the equipment.
Even in New Vegas they atleast had batteries attached to the street lights in the small towns (Personally I would have left out those lamps.) but in F3 every single subway tunnel has working lights and power outlets.
SimCity
People will refuse to move into an area unless there is electrical power, but a complete lack of running water is just a "minor inconvenience".
Widening a roadway requires you to demolish every single building on the side of it.
Drivers will always pick the shortest route instead of the fastest one.
The moment that the tenants move out of a building, it immediately turns into a run-down ghetto shack.
Transportation funding is SRS BUSINESS.
(http://27.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_l9s0oylfm21qz4w1go1_400.png)
SimCity
People will refuse to move into an area unless there is electrical power, but a complete lack of running water is just a "minor inconvenience".
Widening a roadway requires you to demolish every single building on the side of it.
Drivers will always pick the shortest route instead of the fastest one.
The moment that the tenants move out of a building, it immediately turns into a run-down ghetto shack.
Transportation funding is SRS BUSINESS.
(http://27.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_l9s0oylfm21qz4w1go1_400.png)
Oh, that reminds me.
Large factories will happily set up shop in a small town with no links whatsoever with the outside world.
I always did wonder about that. I guess you could assume that the player is only controllíng the city area and the public roads to elsewhere are built by the goverment so they are "assumed" to be there. Personally when I was a kid playing Simcity I just built a road to the edge of the map so that people could move in and out of the map area.