Vending Machine

[I am lizard]

You get weed.

I insert a hudda

[Random Gal]

You get HURRRRRRRRR.

I insert your mom.

[R. U. Sirius]

You get all the guys online who've apparently slept with her.

I insert the Grim Reaper in a Santa suit.

[Feral Dog]

You sprout shiny new testicles.

I insert The Fonz, and the jury from Twelve Angry Men.

[Random Gal]

You get an official conviction of Shark Jumping with the sentence of death (by being fed to the aforementioned shark).

I insert an Ancient Gold Dragon.

[R. U. Sirius]

You get a golden shower.

I insert two servings of milk and one each of lemonade and fudge.

[Random Gal]

You get a violently sick reaction. Apparently your mixing skills need work.

I insert a Bat Credit Card.

[R. U. Sirius]

You get bats in your belfry and a terrible credit score.

I insert the U.S. prison system.

[Ghoti]

You get the American school system.

I insert a stupid argument.

[Second Coming of Madman]

You get Shillgate.

I insert my dick a bearded dragon.

[Ghoti]

You get a dragon sans beard.

I insert my Bad Thoughts Jar.

[rookie]

You get a stream of door to door god salesmen who bought your name and list from a third party marketing firm.

I put in some tasteful, classy yet very provocative lingerie.

[RavynousHunter]

You get used briefs with skidmarks.

I insert Davedan.

[rookie]

You get Dandave, his evil twin.

I insert a hot pocket.

[R. U. Sirius]

You get a condom with badly-made pizza ingredients inside.

I insert furries.