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Author Topic: Wishes Will Be Corrupted  (Read 393518 times)

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Offline R. U. Sirius

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Re: Wishes Will Be Corrupted
« Reply #1185 on: December 09, 2012, 06:27:05 pm »
Granted. A twelve-pack falls from the sky and hits you on the head.

I wish for a magic genie who will grant me unlimited wishes.
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If you look at it logically, cannibalism has great potential to simultaneously solve our overpopulation and food shortage problems.

Saturn500

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Re: Wishes Will Be Corrupted
« Reply #1186 on: December 09, 2012, 06:33:58 pm »
Granted, but he hears every wish as "I wish I had a new book."

I wish I had a new book.
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Offline R. U. Sirius

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Re: Wishes Will Be Corrupted
« Reply #1187 on: December 09, 2012, 07:09:05 pm »
Granted. It's a compendium of gay bestiality porn.

I wish for any non-weather-required clothes to be banned...but only for people I select.
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If you look at it logically, cannibalism has great potential to simultaneously solve our overpopulation and food shortage problems.

Offline Captain Jack Harkness

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Re: Wishes Will Be Corrupted
« Reply #1188 on: December 09, 2012, 10:54:51 pm »
Wish granted.  The world becomes incredibly frigid, and now heavy clothing is required to go outside - that is, if you want to LIVE.

I wish I had TAS (tool-assisted speedrun/superplay) level reflexes.
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Offline Julian

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Re: Wishes Will Be Corrupted
« Reply #1189 on: December 10, 2012, 03:23:37 am »
Granted, but you're still trapped in your standard bipedal, lard-filled, liquid, pus-bag of a body and quickly go insane - particularly in traffic or when talking to people.

I wish FOX would bench everyone who made a dick of themselves on air and was PWN3D by reality, not just Karl Rove.


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Offline R. U. Sirius

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Re: Wishes Will Be Corrupted
« Reply #1190 on: December 10, 2012, 09:48:02 am »
Granted. Despite the rapid downward spiral of fucknuttery as they constantly replace anchors, they become even more respected.

I wish for an end to war that did NOT involve the extinction of the human race.
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If you look at it logically, cannibalism has great potential to simultaneously solve our overpopulation and food shortage problems.

Offline Julian

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Re: Wishes Will Be Corrupted
« Reply #1191 on: December 10, 2012, 11:55:06 am »
Granted, but they end up as abject slaves to their new alien overlords.

I wish the God of irony existed, and Bugarach, the place that's meant to be safe from the Mayan 'prophecy' suffers a massive Earthquake on the 21st of December, and is the only place on Earth to do so.
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Offline ThunderWulf

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Re: Wishes Will Be Corrupted
« Reply #1192 on: December 11, 2012, 08:46:57 pm »
Granted, but that God kills everybody for not believing in him.

I wish that I already had all my shopping done for christmas/holidays done already.
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Art Vandelay

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Re: Wishes Will Be Corrupted
« Reply #1193 on: December 11, 2012, 09:13:21 pm »
Granted. It turns out you gave everyone a handful of sticks you found on the side of the road.

I wish for a box of tasty chicken wings.
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Offline Julian

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Re: Wishes Will Be Corrupted
« Reply #1194 on: December 12, 2012, 04:21:54 am »
Granted. You get two more as a bonus, but have to eat all three boxes in front of a room full of starving refugees.

I wish we had achieved all the MDGs already.
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Offline Captain Jack Harkness

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Re: Wishes Will Be Corrupted
« Reply #1195 on: December 12, 2012, 06:54:12 am »
Wish granted.  I have no fucking idea what MDGs are, so I'll just assume it stands for Massive Dick Gropings.  Yay!  We did it!  Oh, and all the dicks came, and we drowned in the cum.

I wish I had a lifetime supply of free coffee.
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Offline ThunderWulf

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Re: Wishes Will Be Corrupted
« Reply #1196 on: December 12, 2012, 11:03:14 am »
Granted, but it's all made from illegal slave labor.

I wish that I had x-ray vision.
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a.k.a. TGRwulf
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Art Vandelay

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Re: Wishes Will Be Corrupted
« Reply #1197 on: December 12, 2012, 11:16:04 am »
Granted. Be sure to never allow any part of you into your line of sight from now on. Unless, of course, you want cancer.

I wish I had a flying vending machine.
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Offline Julian

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Re: Wishes Will Be Corrupted
« Reply #1198 on: December 12, 2012, 11:41:30 am »
Granted. It likes to use you as a landing pad.

I wish more people had heard of the Millennium Development Goals.
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Offline rookie

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Re: Wishes Will Be Corrupted
« Reply #1199 on: December 13, 2012, 12:17:53 am »
Granted. Two more people have. And they are the two drunkest girls at the party. And they want to talk to you about it.

I wish people didn't make me so angry.
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