The Funny/Stupid Pics Thread

[ironbite]

You just ruined my childhood. You bastard.

I don't usually use this term but....right in the feels.

[Sigmaleph]

I always wondered what the deal was with public toilets. Surely it can't be that hard to keep your shit and piss inside the bowl and flush when you're done. And yet people manage to fail these simple steps all the goddamn time.

I know some of it is the "Fuck you, I don't live here" effect, and some of it is the broken window effect (once you see the place is horrible, you feel less inclined to make any effort), but still.

Also, curious observation: at my university, the public bathrooms vary tremendously in state of cleanliness. Specifically, they are quite adequate in the building mostly populated by physicists and computer scientists, and horrendous in the building mostly populated by biologists. Apparently, 'biology is gross' has more than one correct interpretation.

[Thejebusfire]

When my brother was in kindergarten he expected the teacher to help him in the bathroom (even though he was perfectly capable of going by himself). And I thought that was crazy, but he was four or five.

[Shane for Wax]

Please be trolling.

[chitoryu12]

The only public restrooms I've ever refused to use were the ones at my middle school. As you may imagine, letting a bunch of 11 to 13-year-olds (except that one 16-year-old girl in my 8th grade math class and I'm not making this shit up) freely use toilets without supervision is only a recipe for sorrow.

I walked into the bathrooms there once. Once. As soon as I smelled it, I walked right back out and never returned.

Do you mean that the 16 year old girl was not allowed to use the toilets unsupervised? What the teacher went with her? Wow high school teachers are not paid enough.

You terribly misread that. I was saying that it's a bad idea to let hundreds of 11 to 13-year-olds use toilets unsupervised. I also pointed out that there was a 16-year-old in my 8th grade math class.

Though considering what you'd have to do to be held back 3 years (and she definitely had zero disabilities judging from my various interactions with her over the year and wasn't in any special classes), maybe she SHOULDN'T have been left unsupervised.

[MadCatTLX]

I always wondered what the deal was with public toilets. Surely it can't be that hard to keep your shit and piss inside the bowl and flush when you're done. And yet people manage to fail these simple steps all the goddamn time.

I know some of it is the "Fuck you, I don't live here" effect, and some of it is the broken window effect (once you see the place is horrible, you feel less inclined to make any effort), but still.

Also, curious observation: at my university, the public bathrooms vary tremendously in state of cleanliness. Specifically, they are quite adequate in the building mostly populated by physicists and computer scientists, and horrendous in the building mostly populated by biologists. Apparently, 'biology is gross' has more than one correct interpretation.

I remember when I was in middle school (it was a different school than the one I've posted about) I accidentally left a school library book in the bathroom when I went in between classes and put my bag and stuff on the counter while I pissed. It was left there on the counter and later I realize I left it in there and go to get it, only to find someone has thrown it in one of the toilets, ruining the book, and then they or someone else decided to violently and explosively shit diarrhea all over it. I ended up having to pull it out and I had to pay for the book myself.

When my brother was in kindergarten he expected the teacher to help him in the bathroom (even though he was perfectly capable of going by himself). And I thought that was crazy, but he was four or five.

Help him how? I remember once when I was like 3 or 4 and I was in preschool I made the teacher wipe my ass...

Since we're on the subject, here's some funny toilet vids (embed won't work):

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=B5u3PG7PWDE

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6S0zewtkqso

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=E-CfVzx3sro

[davedan]

The only public restrooms I've ever refused to use were the ones at my middle school. As you may imagine, letting a bunch of 11 to 13-year-olds (except that one 16-year-old girl in my 8th grade math class and I'm not making this shit up) freely use toilets without supervision is only a recipe for sorrow.

I walked into the bathrooms there once. Once. As soon as I smelled it, I walked right back out and never returned.

Do you mean that the 16 year old girl was not allowed to use the toilets unsupervised? What the teacher went with her? Wow high school teachers are not paid enough.

You terribly misread that. I was saying that it's a bad idea to let hundreds of 11 to 13-year-olds use toilets unsupervised. I also pointed out that there was a 16-year-old in my 8th grade math class.

Though considering what you'd have to do to be held back 3 years (and she definitely had zero disabilities judging from my various interactions with her over the year and wasn't in any special classes), maybe she SHOULDN'T have been left unsupervised.

Ok I though it was odd that there was a 16 year old in the 8th grade maths class, I thought that might have explained why people were going to the toilet with her. But now I understand better.

Was she only held back in maths? Was she incredibly dull or just bad.

[chitoryu12]

She was held back for the entire year. Middle school runs from 6th to 8th grade, so she literally had not moved on to high school by the time she was 16. Like I said, I spent the whole year with her. She displayed zero signs of any disability, not even something as minor as dyslexia or dyscalculia. From everything I could glean, she really was just lazy as all hell.

[Hoplite]

While we're on the subject of gross stuff in public places, how 'bout used condoms on a school bus? Someone taking a piss in the corner of a classroom?

How about people going to the bathroom in fitting rooms or having sex in them, because that has happen at my job.

Like Billy Bob Thornton in the uncensored movie Bad Santa? I must have burst some stitches laughing at that scene. The look on John Ritter's face was Priceless

[Hoplite]

I am so sorry for that gross subject. Who would have thought my posting about a note on a toilet seat would devolve into this

Last week, there was a news article about a guy who soiled his pants while being scanned in a Federal Courthouse here. They would not let him pass until he passed the scan, and when he got to the bathroom, he had to soil the floor in order to clean out his pants. He got arrested on very many charges when the custodian refused to clean up the bathroom due to its... state. To make a long story short: 2 years of trial and he was finally convicted by 3 magistrates. Now he has to spend time in jail. His lawyers are working on appeals and the word now is that it may go to the Supreme Court of the United States  

http://media.ca1.uscourts.gov/cgi-bin/getopn.pl?OPINION=12-1842P.01A

[MadCatTLX]

She was held back for the entire year. Middle school runs from 6th to 8th grade, so she literally had not moved on to high school by the time she was 16. Like I said, I spent the whole year with her. She displayed zero signs of any disability, not even something as minor as dyslexia or dyscalculia. From everything I could glean, she really was just lazy as all hell.

They'll hold people back for being lazy where you live? I know people who I can't recall ever doing any work and they were somehow never held back. Granted they might have made it through with a D- based on participation or some shit.

[Hoplite]

Help him how? I remember once when I was like 3 or 4 and I was in preschool I made the teacher wipe my ass...

Since we're on the subject, here's some funny toilet vids (embed won't work):

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=B5u3PG7PWDE

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6S0zewtkqso

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=E-CfVzx3sro

Re: youtube embed... I think if you use the Youtube button, it works only if you remove the https and replace it with http. It's what I do to make it work

[PosthumanHeresy]

I have never seen a public toilet seat anywhere near that bad a quality.

Afraid of butt cooties?

No, more afraid of AIDS, HIV, every other STD, tentinus and the general layer of filth that coats the literal shitholes.

You can't get AIDS or HIV from toilet seats...unless you have a gaping wound on one of you ass cheeks and there's some fresh, HIV infected blood covering the seat.  Then you might be able to contract AIDS.

I don't know about other STD's but I have never ever heard, form a relaiable source, of a confirmed case of someone who definately contracted an STD from a toilet.

I know this. I've seen bloody public toilets, and I've seen public toilets with sharp broken parts and rusty, sharp broken parts, and at least one bloody, rusty, sharp broken part. I've also seen them covered in shit, piss, puke, a mix of the three, bloody puke, and things I don't even know the identity of. I do not like public toilets. I do not know where your ass has been, or where the last twenty thousand asses were.

Christ, what where are those toilets?  I've been in some pretty nasty toilets in my time but god damn.  Suddenly all those times I regretted not wearing wellington boots don't seem quite so bad.

I do not like public toilets. I do not know where your ass has been, or where the last twenty thousand asses were.

Oh yeah, I hate public bogs too and try to avoid using them as much as possible.  I wasn't saying anything about your general repulsion at the use of such facilities, I think we all share that repulsion to at least some degree.  I was only addressing your statement about AIDS that, without the additional information you later provided, read as if you were one of those people who incorrectly believes you can contract AIDS from normal, unbroken, unbloodied public toilet seats.

To both of you, I've been, by road, from Central Florida to New York twice, from New York to Central Florida by road once, and from Central Florida to Tennessee once (and back again). Some were in Florida, some in other states.

I know this. I've seen bloody public toilets, and I've seen public toilets with sharp broken parts and rusty, sharp broken parts, and at least one bloody, rusty, sharp broken part. I've also seen them covered in shit, piss, puke, a mix of the three, bloody puke, and things I don't even know the identity of. I do not like public toilets. I do not know where your ass has been, or where the last twenty thousand asses were.

Q1: Where do you live?
Q2: How can we live far, far away from there?

It's not where I live now. New York takes better care of their toilets.

I always wondered what the deal was with public toilets. Surely it can't be that hard to keep your shit and piss inside the bowl and flush when you're done. And yet people manage to fail these simple steps all the goddamn time.

I know some of it is the "Fuck you, I don't live here" effect, and some of it is the broken window effect (once you see the place is horrible, you feel less inclined to make any effort), but still.

Also, curious observation: at my university, the public bathrooms vary tremendously in state of cleanliness. Specifically, they are quite adequate in the building mostly populated by physicists and computer scientists, and horrendous in the building mostly populated by biologists. Apparently, 'biology is gross' has more than one correct interpretation.

It's the GIFT in real life. They're anonymous, and in the shitter. The worst thing I've ever done is write "Bad Wolf" on the stall. If I'm going to do vandalism, it's going to be geeky vandalism.

[chitoryu12]

She was held back for the entire year. Middle school runs from 6th to 8th grade, so she literally had not moved on to high school by the time she was 16. Like I said, I spent the whole year with her. She displayed zero signs of any disability, not even something as minor as dyslexia or dyscalculia. From everything I could glean, she really was just lazy as all hell.

They'll hold people back for being lazy where you live? I know people who I can't recall ever doing any work and they were somehow never held back. Granted they might have made it through with a D- based on participation or some shit.

Depends on the teacher and student. Sometimes they'll pass people through just to get them out of the school system, but it's fully possible to be held back. My ex-friend's sister (the friend who left the abandoned house down the street) was in similar straits, where she'd be out of her teens by the time she finished high school.

Never got that far, since she got pregnant at 15 or 16 and dropped out. Now she works at 7-11.

[Hoplite]

It's the GIFT in real life. They're anonymous, and in the shitter. The worst thing I've ever done is write "Bad Wolf" on the stall. If I'm going to do vandalism, it's going to be geeky vandalism.

That reminds me of a quote, I believe it was Sam Kinison who said that when you get AIDS, you just were fucked by every person who had it . Sorry, I can't find the exact quote, it was more profound than my simple mind could remember. Not very politically correct in the least, it was 1980s material, around the times when they made movies like Porky's and Blazing Saddles, which would be unthinkable in this era.