Well, you can't. You'll be reading Kelly Sue DeConnick's Captain Marvel, which we have randomly assigned, and reading anything else will result in an NSA report landing on our desk, at which point we will carpet-bomb your neighbourhood using unmanned drones.
It's harsh but unfair.
On a not-really-lighter note, it's Simpsons quote time:
"It was a Time magazine. Does that matter?"
"This could be bad."
"What?"
"Syrian hardliners are gaining influence."
Indeed.