A birch and a beech tree were looking down at a sapling on the ground. "That's one fine son of a birch!" says the birch. "No, no, that's one fine son of a beech!" says the beech. So they argued until a woodpecker flew by, and they asked the woodpecker to settle the argument for them. The woodpecker pecked the sapling, and looked up and said, "that is the finest piece of ash I ever stuck my pecker into."