Well, it may be different for me since I spent most of my life teaching myself about all sorts of animals, but to me, the House Spider and the Recluse look nothing alike. Besides, the recluse gets its name from being kind of hard to find. Widow spiders are sort of to themselves too, but sometimes you can find them out in places where you think, "What the hell do you think you're doing there?" They're not too aggressive unless they're directly assaulted or if they've got eggs to protect. They also are pretty noticeable thanks to their jet black (or dark brown) coloring with a bright red hourglass (or roundish spot, if it's an Ozzie Redback).
Though I can really understand being leery about both Recluses and Widows if you're the least bit unsure about what could be what, because their bites can indeed be nasty.
The only reason I'm so blaze' about it is because I've studied stuff like this for so long. (Pretty much from when I was old enough to read to now.)
A good spider to have around is the Cellar Spider. They're brown, but they're shaped nothing like a Recluse as their bodies are too small and their legs are too spindly (Something interesting to note is they showed one on TV going up against a very large venomous predatory spider and it looked like the Cellar Spider didn't have a chance... It won. Hands...er.. legs down. That was something to see.)
Oh and as far as worrying only about the venomous spiders... All spiders have venom. Just some spider venom is stronger than others. Just like I tell kids that all snakes can bite, but only a comparative few can kill you. The non-venomous bites don't exactly tickle though... especially if they're a larger snake or have sharp fish-eating teeth like bloody Water Snakes... man, they can be ornery...
Yeah... I've gone into professorial mode...
