Things That Annoy You

[Askold]

People keep spamming this knife ad all over the net but it really is useless.


So, when stabbing it makes a bigger wound that bleeds more? That's not helpful. No, it really isn't. If the victim will bleed to death in a few minutes, what do you think they will do in the meantime? If they aren't incapacitated already they will fight back so you will have to stab them again and again until they stop fighting. And in that scenario it does not matter whether you use this spiral dagger or a cheap Mora, hit a location that will disable the enemy or fight until they bleed out, but "minutes" is a really long time during a knife fight.

Besides, if your aim is to stab someone once and then run away it would be better that the blood stays inside the body rather than comes out through the gaping hole. The blood will cause all kinds of problems with internal bleeding but letting it out is the lesser evil.

Other problems:

a) You can't cut or slash properly and seeing as 99% of the time you use a knife for something other than stabbing motherfuckers this is a downside.
b) The handle isn't good. A perfectly round handle isn't as easy to hold as oval.
c) No added value for the price compared to cheaper knives. (Actually, a screwdriver is about as useful as a stabbing weapon.)
d) The name is a marketing trick, Jagdkommando don't really use it.

[Svata]

Seriously, outside of professionals, I have never even seen any manner of fight that lasted "minutes". Two. three at the very most, and that's start to finish, unarmed. I doubt any knife fight has lasted that long.

[Askold]

Seriously, outside of professionals, I have never even seen any manner of fight that lasted "minutes". Two. three at the very most, and that's start to finish, unarmed. I doubt any knife fight has lasted that long.

Exactly, the bleed out time will not matter.

[RavynousHunter]

Besides, who's going to carry that honkin' ass piece of shit around with them for self-defense?  Seriously, thing looks about as long as my forearm, its just not practical to carry, unlike a standard flip-knife, which you can keep in your pocket, or even clipped to your belt, with some of 'em.  Its also gonna be slower to attack with, given that it looks about as heavy as your average human infant, whereas a run-of-the-mill pocket knife weighs maybe a few dozen grams, at most.

0/10; all looks, no usability.

[davedan]

You also really don't want someone to bleed to death if you are acting in self defence anyway. Imagine convincing a jury that you didn't intend to kill when you are up on murder charges. Quite honestly you are probably fucked in the head if you use a knife for self defence anyway. A knife is an offensive and not defensive weapon.

If you are really in a such a rough place that you can't rely on your fists or your penis then you are better of with a lump of wood, a bat or a baton than a knife anyway. One it is longer and gives you greater reach. Two you are less likely to accidentally kill a motherfucker so you can swing more freely. Three you are far less likely to fuck yourself up with it than you are with a knife which could fuck you up if you slip over or if you just don't know how to use it properly.

Finally in almost all cases you are better off using your words and talking through the situation or running like you've just broken out of san quentin than fighting at all.

[Zygarde]

Also how much do you wanna bet that hilt is hollow? (For those who don't know hollow hilts are bad for knives cause they reduce the stability.)

[rookie]

Personally I don't like the idea of fighting knives. It takes all kinds of specialized training to get ok enough with it to use. It's actually easier and much more effective to take two quarters to the back and trade then in on a penny roll.

[davedan]

It's actually easier and much more effective to take two quarters to the back and trade then in on a penny roll.

I really have no idea what this means but I desperately want to know

[Sigmaleph]

Take two 25c coins to the bank, exchange them for 50c worth of pennies, which are given in the form of a roll:



I don't know what the exact self-defence applications of a roll of pennies are but I know they exist

[davedan]

I get it now. You can either use it in your fist to make the punches harder or put it in a footy sock and flog somebody with it.

Edit: although my preferred method of self defence would be to pull open the roll scattering pennies everywhere and to run away while they were picking them up

[dpareja]

I get it now. You can either use it in your fist to make the punches harder or put it in a footy sock and flog somebody with it.

Edit: although my preferred method of self defence would be to pull open the roll scattering pennies everywhere and to run away while they were picking them up

Watch John Oliver's spiel about pennies. News crews have tried this: they scatter a hundred or a hundred and fifty pennies on the ground and film people's reactions. They just walk right by.

[rookie]

Give that squirrel a cracker! I prefer gripped in my fist, but I've seen in the sock and cannot argue the results were satisfactory.

[Askold]

Davedan, when I am talking about knifefights I am talking about hypotethical scenarios knowing full well that the only times when I would carry a knife for self defense would be during a war, zombie revolution or something similar (and it would mainly be a tool with the "stab a motherfucker" as a last resort when all other weapons cannot be used.)

[TheUnknown]

It's the year 2016 and there are men who still think "master key/shitty lock" is a clever and accurate metaphor.

[davedan]

Davedan, when I am talking about knifefights I am talking about hypotethical scenarios knowing full well that the only times when I would carry a knife for self defense would be during a war, zombie revolution or something similar (and it would mainly be a tool with the "stab a motherfucker" as a last resort when all other weapons cannot be used.)

Ok I thought you were just being a finnish person. Zombie apocalypse still better off with a bat than a knife.