Something I just thought about that bugs the fuck outta me, the huge stink people make about how a restaurant's menu items "aren't healthy enough." I'm sorry, but the last time I checked, they didn't make zero-calorie bacon cheeseburgers, and if they do, they're probably made out of fucking cardboard and/or taste like shit roasted over burning tires. I know I'm coming across as an arse saying this, but I really miss the fucking days when I was a kid and what mattered most about the food that you got from a restaurant was that it was actually safe to fucking eat.
Nowadays, its all calorie counts and fat totals and salt concentrations and hundreds of fucking annoying diagrams and tables and shit I don't fucking care about, I WANT A FUCKING BACON CHEESEBURGER, YOU FUCKING CUNTS. It clutters up menus and annoys the fuck outta me.
Look, if you wanna eat healthy, that's fine, I understand that. But, for the love of baby Jesus, stop shoving your health food cock in my grease-covered menu items! You fuckers had your own section of the menu for a tonne of places, but NO, that just wasn't good enough for you, was it?! Now, I have to be practically guilt tripped by an inanimate object before I can order my delicious, salty, fatty, bacon-covered meals. Its like, "Oh, you want a fried cheese baconburger? DO YOU KNOW THAT HAS FAT IN IT?! AND CALORIES?!" Yeah, I kinda figured that, since anyone with a fucking primary school education knows that cheese and bacon are some of the fattiest fucking things you can eat.
But, no, you whiny little health pricks just have to stick your noses where they're not fucking wanted. I'm a fat fuck primarily because of inactivity, I know this. You know what? I don't fucking care. I'd like to lose a bit of this, sure, but its not exactly a priority for me. I'll have my extra big-ass soda, my double Baconator, and my large fucking fries! Get that calorie-counting bullshit outta my fucking menus, and let the healthy fucks have their Healthy Fuck side of the menu. Its like that Fatkins bullshit all over again, only this time, its actually becoming ingrained into our culture.
Epic Meal Time needs to start a fucking chain, fight against this bullshit.