Author Topic: The most badass movie about not Masterbating EVER!  (Read 397 times)

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Offline Skybison

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The most badass movie about not Masterbating EVER!
« on: January 19, 2019, 02:00:05 am »
It's called CONQUER: THE BATTLE PLAN FOR PURITY!  The 12 DVD box set released by the American Family Association to help you, yes you!, win the battle against masturbation.  Yes an entire 12 dvds of how not to masturbate!  Just what everyone wants.  And here is it's actual trailer

<a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GMMMEnpYcEM" target="_blank">http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GMMMEnpYcEM</a>

That is exactly how badass it is to not masturbate!

Now take the weapon in your hand, and beat the enemy!
« Last Edit: January 19, 2019, 02:04:26 am by Skybison »

Art Vandelay

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Re: The most badass movie about not Masterbating EVER!
« Reply #1 on: January 19, 2019, 02:17:15 am »
I've seen porn with less pandering than this shit, which is rather appropriate, I suppose.

Offline DarkPhoenix

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Re: The most badass movie about not Masterbating EVER!
« Reply #2 on: January 19, 2019, 09:39:23 pm »
Only three words:

WHAT.  THE.  FUCK?

Offline Chaos Undivided

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Re: The most badass movie about not Masterbating EVER!
« Reply #3 on: January 19, 2019, 10:03:02 pm »
No Kirk Cameron.

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Offline DarkPhoenix

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Re: The most badass movie about not Masterbating EVER!
« Reply #4 on: January 19, 2019, 11:21:50 pm »
BTW, anyone check the COMMENTS on that fucking video?  Holy shit...

Best one, though, is the guy who says he masturbated to this video, what with all the phallic imagery...

Offline niam2023

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Re: The most badass movie about not Masterbating EVER!
« Reply #5 on: January 20, 2019, 02:12:38 am »
Yeah, without Kirk Cameron or that guy from Old Fashioned or even the Hey Scotty Jesus Man guy this film seriously lacks Pureflix "star power".

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Offline Kanzenkankaku

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Re: The most badass movie about not Masterbating EVER!
« Reply #6 on: January 20, 2019, 04:14:50 am »
What could you even put on 12 dvd's when you can just say "Don't fap because I interperate the bible a very specific way and sex frightens me." How is that movie even that long?

Offline RavynousHunter

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Re: The most badass movie about not Masterbating EVER!
« Reply #7 on: January 20, 2019, 11:06:41 am »
...Maybe they used a really high resolution for the video?  God demands the finest in ultra-HD technology, after all.
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