Children annoy me, particularly my cousin's four-year-old daughter who never leaves me alone. I hate kids so much that I feel like I emit some sort of angry glow, and yet they all flock to me. This one is bossy, bratty, and obnoxious. She once ordered me to put another kid in timeout because she had to share with him. Order me again and I'll throw your ass in timeout.
Also, there is a bear on my deck right now. I know he always comes around this time, but he makes a LOT of noise, and any loud thumps outside at night always make me think SERIAL KILLER. Sometimes it's not even a lot of noise, but just the right amount to fucking scare you because you're not 100% positive it's a bear.
And he's pawing at the door. T_T