You know that ass zit I have? Well, it turns out it was actually a blister (it was late at night when I last posted about it), and not a regular blister that's gone once popped, but a blister that fights back with a vengeance. I've been trying to pop it once and for all for the past couple of days and it felt like I was trying to hack off a finger. Then I think "fuck it" and decide to just stab it as hard as I can with the a pair of nail scissors. Well, needless to say, I was in agony for the next couple of hours. Was it gone, though? Nope, still there. Only now it's not only leaking puss all over my upper ass crack, but it's actually called for reinforcements. Now sitting down is even worse, and I have to keep a wad of toilet paper wedged in my crack so I don't make a mess of my general surroundings.
Well, that's it. The blisters win. I've surrendered unconditionally, and allowed them to occupy and annex all provinces and territories of the Upper Asscrackia region. Hopefully the problem'll sort itself out over the next few days or so.
...Why the everloving fuck did I post this here? I could've sworn I put it in Things That Annoy You. I swear, every second post I make, I put it in the wrong thread. I must be going senile.