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Author Topic: Wishes Will Be Corrupted  (Read 591900 times)

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Offline Eniliad

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Re: Wishes Will Be Corrupted
« Reply #495 on: March 08, 2012, 06:03:25 am »


(Hey, not all corrupted wishes have to be bad - army men are kickass.)

I wish for two hundred pounds.

(Kidding. Think we all know where that one goes.)

I wish for functioning Linux drivers for my current video card, that actually fucking work, so that I can play Minecraft at a decent framerate on good settings.
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Art Vandelay

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Re: Wishes Will Be Corrupted
« Reply #496 on: March 08, 2012, 10:09:14 pm »
Granted, but your computer is now a Mac.

I wish I could control time.
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Offline Random Gal

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Re: Wishes Will Be Corrupted
« Reply #497 on: March 08, 2012, 11:14:20 pm »
Granted, but upon trying to travel back in time you get eaten by a Tyrannosaurus rex.

I wish to be in a perfect relationship.
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Offline e13

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Re: Wishes Will Be Corrupted
« Reply #498 on: March 09, 2012, 12:07:28 am »
Quote from: Random Guy on March 08, 2012, 11:14:20 pm
Granted, but upon trying to travel back in time you get eaten by a Tyrannosaurus rex.

I wish to be in a perfect relationship.
Granted. You have one perfect relationship. All of your friends and family sense the unnatural presence of this and shun you. Forever.

I wish I could get a raise that was over 10¢.
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Offline Meshakhad

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Re: Wishes Will Be Corrupted
« Reply #499 on: March 09, 2012, 09:25:18 pm »
Quote from: e13 on March 09, 2012, 12:07:28 am
Quote from: Random Guy on March 08, 2012, 11:14:20 pm
Granted, but upon trying to travel back in time you get eaten by a Tyrannosaurus rex.

I wish to be in a perfect relationship.
Granted. You have one perfect relationship. All of your friends and family sense the unnatural presence of this and shun you. Forever.

I wish I could get a raise that was over 10¢.

Granted. You get an erection, and your penis is slightly longer than ten stacked pennies.

I wish Rush Limbaugh would randomly be transported to Westeros, and introduced to one Asha Greyjoy. For those who do not know, Asha is a somewhat promiscuous woman who also commands her own longship and wields a battleaxe.
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Art Vandelay

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Re: Wishes Will Be Corrupted
« Reply #500 on: March 10, 2012, 01:19:43 am »
Granted, but he bites your knob off before he leaves.

I wish my lab reports would write themselves.
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Offline Captain Jack Harkness

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Re: Wishes Will Be Corrupted
« Reply #501 on: March 10, 2012, 12:37:36 pm »
Wish granted.  They sound like they were written by a dyslexic five-year-old.

I wish I had a less crazy semester.
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Offline e13

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Re: Wishes Will Be Corrupted
« Reply #502 on: March 10, 2012, 03:36:35 pm »
Quote from: B-Man on March 10, 2012, 12:37:36 pm
Wish granted.  They sound like they were written by a dyslexic five-year-old.

I wish I had a less crazy semester.
Granted. All your classes are put on hold and you're sent home for the remainder of the semester. You can continue where you left off after the hold ends. Sounds simple, right?

I wish I could see through walls when I willed it so, and then turn said ability off when I willed it so, always being able to do both.

Yeah.  :P
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Offline Captain Jack Harkness

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Re: Wishes Will Be Corrupted
« Reply #503 on: March 10, 2012, 04:33:29 pm »
Wish granted.  You can will it, but not without total concentration.  You see some kinky things you wish you could unsee.

I wish I could live as a female for one week.
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Offline Eniliad

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Re: Wishes Will Be Corrupted
« Reply #504 on: March 10, 2012, 04:40:37 pm »
Granted - enjoy your first period. :P

On a similar note: I wish I had multiple femmy outfits (that fit) I can wear.
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Offline Zygarde

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Re: Wishes Will Be Corrupted
« Reply #505 on: March 10, 2012, 05:36:41 pm »
granted but they all shrink in the wash


I wish that i could find a good looking gay man in New Orleans who isn't a dick.
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Offline e13

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Re: Wishes Will Be Corrupted
« Reply #506 on: March 10, 2012, 05:40:24 pm »
Quote from: Captian.Robinson on March 10, 2012, 05:36:41 pm
granted but they all shrink in the wash


I wish that i could find a good looking gay man in New Orleans who isn't a dick.
Granted. His name is Bob, not Richard. He's an asshole.

I wish I was two inches taller.
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Art Vandelay

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Re: Wishes Will Be Corrupted
« Reply #507 on: March 10, 2012, 08:16:33 pm »
Granted, but your legs are four inches shorter.

I wish I had more money.
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Offline jumpingjackflash

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Re: Wishes Will Be Corrupted
« Reply #508 on: March 10, 2012, 08:24:02 pm »


I wish for a silver trophy.
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Offline Her3tiK

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Re: Wishes Will Be Corrupted
« Reply #509 on: March 10, 2012, 09:49:18 pm »
Quote from: jumpingjackflash on March 10, 2012, 08:24:02 pm


I wish for a silver trophy.
Congratulations, you are the 2nd worst person in the country!
(click to show/hide)

I wish I had the money to finish my education.
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